Premature Ejaculation

[lookin_forfun65]

He should see a urologist. I worked in urology for 15 years, and like was previously mentioned, topical creams to lessen sensitivity a bit. Some may be found over the counter, or some might require a prescription, so he should talk to a professional about it.

Please tell him that it is common, and there is help.

[hotcpl4unfla]

I have the same problem. Mine is attributed to not actually having vaginal sex frequently enough with my partner. I love oral sex, and so does the wife, so we just go for it for an hour or so and finish off with intercourse. Of course by that time, she's just begging to cum, so I don't have to pump too long to set both of us off. Hence, my downfall in the group setting. I just can't last as long as the other guy....he's still pumping away long after the wife and I have had our fun. I have to admit, the wife and I get a chuckle out of it, since it seems like he is almost "desensitized" to it. We just stick to our oral/straight sex routine and haven't had any trouble. I have found that different positions can help. I can't last longer than 2 minutes going at it missionary style or doggy style. But if she's on top or reverse cowgirling it, I'm good well after she's cum. Of course, those positions don't feel as good as the others, but if staying time is what you need, I say try it. Now if the guy has busted a nut before the underwear's off, he needs to see a urologist. But you have to realize, men are visual creatures. Just the sight of another woman in the throes of passion in the same room as he and his wife is enough to set him off. Especially if the whole thing is new to him. I had the female half of one couple come up to me and tell me she wished her husband came a little quicker, since she was done and drying up by the time he decided to get off. She said it started to hurt and she was getting rubbed raw. So quicker isn't necessarily bad, providing he gets his other half off as well.

[nxgn1]

Man do I understand this. When my wife and I first started having sex I was so worried that I couldnt get it up. Well guess what I was right but it was really all in my head. Most I would say is fear and since it happens everytime it must really mess with his head. He keeps looking for it to happen and it dose it just makes it even worse. Here is a little reverse thought here why dont you tell him how much it turns you on to make him cum so fast. And when he dose just act happy or turned on by it. Giving him time and the ability in his on head to feel not so much under pressure to perform would probably help him. I know I had to get to the point that I had to stop being afraid I couldnt perform first. After that It came up quite easly. I know that prem ejac is saying he really exited just imagine women if you could come very quickly that turns a man on. Then change the situation in your mind and im sure it will help him.

[EternallySingle]

Most of the time premature ejaculation is mental. If it were your husband the solution would be simple:Tell him how great he is, how much you love him, and work him up to another erection. FIve or ten minutes later he'd be good to go.

Since he is just a guest, guess what. He's already nervous. He has a PE once and he feels he doesn't measure up, especially since he with another man's wife and is supposed to be helping her have the time of her life. Can't do that if you shoot too quick. Of course, hubby's right there to pick up the slack and what is he there for? Better to just pack it in and go home. Of course, when you call next week he is eager to try again because obviously you really like him, but what if it happens again? Well, you told him to take care of business before hand, which means he doesn't satisfy you. Man, he really wants to make a good impression and not look like a wimp so he can't say no. But are you just being nice to him? Well, he can have a couple of drinks before you all start. That seems to delay things some. Maybe if he tries...

Don't over analyse HIS problem. If he has a physical problem, its up to HIM to decide to go see a doctor. Unless you live as a triad (in which case he wouldn't be nervous about being with you since he would be with you as much as your husband) the only thing you can do is be a friend and try not to make him feel worse. The more you worry about it, the more he will believe something is more is wrong with him than ejaculating too soon. Thats where his embarrassment is coming from. His PE sounds like performance anxiety from the little you wrote. Combine being excited about a very kinky (for the rest of the world LOL) lifestyle with not having 1-on-1 sex on a regular basis and he's gonna be on a hair trigger. Relieve his anxiety by NOT trying to fix his problem. If you don't make it an issue, he won't dwell on it and be so anxious. If he's not so anxious, he'll start to slow down and everyone will enjoy it more.