Erection Questions

[Arrival5]

Okay, here is my situation; the sexual M.O. for me and hubby generally consists of lots and lots of foreplay (oral sex, masturbation, toys, toys and more toys) all directed towards me with the result of my having several orgasms, and then to finish off the night we do something -regular sex, anal sex, blow job or hand job to get him off. Once that happens we are done for the night - meaning his orgasm is more like the encore.

Believe me, I am not complaining at all - I love the attention, I love getting off facelick , and he seems to really enjoy assisting me (Technically he "fucks" me with several of the toys we have - but that doesn't really count for his pleasure IMO). I just feel bad that he gets one shot a night and that is it. Ever since we got out of college (we have been together for 15 years, married for 11 years.) he seems to only have one orgasm in him a day. Maybe we are starting too late in the evening and the one orgasm just wipes him out. Although we have tried to sneak in a blow job or quickie in the late morning, early afternoon with the hopes of picking things up later in the evening, but that rarely has worked. Exhaustion sets in by bed time and we never seem to find our way back.

I have wondered if one of the ED drugs could help us. We weren't sure if the doc would give him a prescription since he can in fact get an erection - he just can't get a second or third or fourth......and we thought that wanting multiple erections may be too greedy a reason to ask for said drugs. I, however, am ready to get greedy and go into the docs office and ask for them myself. It just feels so unfair for me to have such a mind blowing, crazed, orgasmic night and all he gets is this one 5 to 10 minute shot.

What do you guys think? Have any of you men out there had a similar problem and did ED drugs help? I read a lot of the forums about Viagra and such, but most of the men who posted seemed to not have a problem with multiple erections in one night - just the intensity of those erections, and ED drugs helped them have better hard-ons.

Also, if we were to try any drugs, do you have any recommendations? Hubby suffers from the occasional migraine, so I am a little leary since I have read that certain ones can cause bad headaches.

Thanks for any advice you can give me!!!

[DGrey]

I'd try some Horny Goat Weed first...we've had great results with it. D was the same way with only having one shot but not anymore. I take it to combat the dryness and occasional lack of drive from being on the Pill.

E

[2jersey]

When we were age 20ish, Mr 2jersey would have two orgasms most evenings and Mrs 2jersey would also have two. Now we are age 40ish, and Mrs 2jersey
has two during 'foreplay' and a couple more during intercourse - yet Mr 2jersey has only one per day. Neither of us is longing for the 'old days'.

As a male ages, he enjoys giving pleasure more and more - and orgasms are somewhat less important.

We don't know anything about ED drugs, so can't address your main question.

[sereneiders]

IMHO you're being more Popists than the same Pope here.

I believe it is a mistake to suppose every people feels the same way about sexual response and the ways they get satisfied, and more important, to forget the well know differences between males and females.

I am much like your hubby, I enjoy long plays, enjoy very much providing pleasure, but I am a one shoot guy (Exceptionally it happend I had a second round), but for me this is what is NORMAL and satisfying, and I don't know of the theoretical "more satisfaction" I am supposedly missing, because I never had the "multiple orgasm" experience. I only heard of such a thing from women.

This is like missing to eat candies. For this to happen, you have to be able to taste a candy as to be able to like candies in the first place, and just then we may begin talking about missing them. For someone who ever had a candy, the whole "missing candy" stuff is meaningless.

The same applies to the "orgasm" concept, I know how it feels what I call an orgasm, but I cannot tell nor suppose you feel the same I do when you feel what you call an orgasm. I gess it is the same, or something pretty close, but in fact no one can tell for sure (as no one can tell if we see colors the same way, we believe we do because we both agree something is red and something else is blue, but then the colors stuff is just about a naming convention and not about subjective perception).

Perhaps your hubby may ask himself the same question I do to myself about this subject. Since none of your multiple orgasms render you useless for any further sexual activity, what prevents me from supposing your orgasms are less intense than the ones I have (or your hubby have)? If this were true, your hubby could feel sorry for you, because you wouldn't be feeling the same great thing he does.

But I bet you'd be laughing at such a supposition, because you already know you have blowing mind orgasms, that you don't require them to be even more blowing than what they already are (unless wanting to end up like Igor in Woody Allen's "All you want to know about sex..." movie), so my toughts are meaningless for you. I am talking about my very personal candies, ones you wont be ever able to taste, nor to miss.

And the opposite is true as well. You're talking about your personal candies, ones that your hubby wont be ever able to taste, and even less to miss.

But what I feel is something to worry about is the pressure you two are putting on this issue, a pressure that may end up convincing some of you or both that you're not the one able to please him, or that there should be something wrong with him, and such a conviction actually may end up spoiling your sex life. So I'd suggest you to let it go.

[DBL D]

Some of my single orgasms count for 10! And then I am completely drained...shakey even. It just so happens that when we are with each other, usually we have other things going on. We see each other so often that we really can be around each other and not have sex...Then there are those times on the boat or where it's planned or scheduled, that we have more time...and if we aren't too blown away by the monkey sex we just had, we'll go for a while.

As long as you both are happy. I mean what's he gonna say? He's probably not programmed to thinking that you actually can have more than one orgasm/day. If you can work the situation right and he has two in a day.... Wow Surrender ...he'll be rejuvinated! And you'll look pretty cool.

Male D

[JandT_Elkhart]

To answer your most direct question about ED drugs. I just went to my Dr and said,
"Ya know, I don't really have any problems the FIRST time, but on some special occasions I'd like to be able to do it a couple times. Is there any reason I can't get a prescription for those special times?"

Dr. gave me a sample of 5 50mgs, and a scrip for 5 of the 100mg Viagras, told me to cut them in half (they are cheaper at 100mg) and I was on my way. A year later he refilled. I'm almost another year in, and have 1 100mg left... you can tell I don't use them very often

[DGrey]

I should add that D uses the Horny Goat Weed not to be able to cum more than once in a night he was having a problem with not being able to get hard after cumming. Problem is, is that when he gets really excited, or if we switch off and he plays with me for a while, he cums pretty quickly but still wants to play. Now, he can get a second erection, play the rest of the night and sometimes have a second orgasm and sometimes not.

E

[Arrival5]

Originally Posted by JandT_Elkhart

To answer your most direct question about ED drugs. I just went to my Dr and said,
"Ya know, I don't really have any problems the FIRST time, but on some special occasions I'd like to be able to do it a couple times. Is there any reason I can't get a prescription for those special times?"

Dr. gave me a sample of 5 50mgs, and a scrip for 5 of the 100mg Viagras, told me to cut them in half (they are cheaper at 100mg) and I was on my way. A year later he refilled. I'm almost another year in, and have 1 100mg left... you can tell I don't use them very often

Thanks for your response. I assume that the medicine has worked for you the way you wanted it to. In my original post I never really said how my hubby feels about all of this. He doesn't seem to have a problem with the way things are (me-multiple orgasms, him-one orgasm.), but he has mentioned that it would be nice to have marathon sex on certain occasions. Such as when we have a rare opportunity to be away from our kids, or when we go on a solo vacation together. (We really want to go to one of the Hedo resorts or Desire - a perfect place for marathon sex.)

I really don't have a problem with our day to day sex life. I feel blessed to have the partner that I have. We have such a great connection and trust that I think is essential for an incredible sexual relationship, and he really knows how to please me. I think I just need to get more comfortable with the fact that part of his pleasure is seeing me get off and him knowing that he is the one responsible for my euphoria.

Women are by nature peacemakers and very giving individuals. We like to please others, sometimes at our own expense. With that said, it's rather ironic that women were blessed with the ability to have multiple orgasms. It puts us in the situation of abandoning these instincts and allowing someone else to serve us. It is really not that surprising that such a large percentage of women haven't had an orgasm in their lifetime - maybe some of these women just can't let go of their natural instincts to please others and just lay back and enjoy themselves. I could delve deeper into this and point out that most women can't orgasm through intercourse alone, so they HAVE to be pleasured in other ways to reap the ultimate reward. My point is that in the bedroom nature forces us into a role reversal where the man is doing a lot of the work and the woman just lies back and enjoys herself - much like a man sitting in his lazy boy, watching a football game, knocking back a cold one while his wife slaves in the kitchen to make him something to eat. Just a little food for thought....

[2jersey]

Newsweek
May 15, 2006 issue - Aging boomers aren't the only ones using Viagra—college men are, too. In a new anonymous survey of 234 sexually active male students at three college campuses, researchers at Children's Memorial Hospital in Chicago found that 6 percent have used erectile-dysfunction medications. While about half of the 18- to 25-year-olds said they took Viagra, Cialis or Levitra to treat erectile dysfunction, says researcher Najah Musacchio, others popped the pills because they wanted to "have more sex," "have more fun" or simply "to try it." (For men with normal erections, a drug won't make their erection stronger, though it may shorten the recovery period between sexual bouts.)

[JandT_Elkhart]

I have to disagree about not making the "normal" erection stronger. I normally get VERY hard without it... had several comments about it from swinging partners. But with 50mg of "V" it gets so hard it almost hurts. And the head gets bigger.

The other side-effect, at least for me, is it reduces the feeling a little bit. I can go longer, once even to the point of having to fight to have an orgasm.

I am very pleased with the results, other than a very slight headache the next morning (more of a feeling like being stuffed up from allergies with a slight headache). In swinging, I am always a bit nervous and this 50mg helps a LOT, knowing FOR SURE I'm going to have no problem at all to get and maintain an erection!

[xxoticangel]

I have noticed a similar situation develop in our love making the last 3 years or so. When we have sex at night hubby is usually only able to achieve one orgasm. This is probably caused by stress and being over tired. The times we have marathon sex it happens when we start earlier in the day. If we can start with morning sex and continue throughout the day he is still, even at 42, able to have 4 or more orgasms before we go to sleep. Also, because he works out early in the morning his testostrone (sp?) is higher in the morning than later in the day.
As for ED drugs...he has used them and has a perscripton for viagra. Accoring to him, taking them is like being 18 again. While he might not be able to orgasm as quickly the second time he still remains hard and can keep going until I say stop. We usually reserve the use of ED drugs for playdates and special occasions. This past Saturday he took 1/2 a viagra around 7 pm and we were able to engage in some very interesting playtime until midnight when I threw in the towel because I had to work early Sunday morning.

[TLO7777]

Originally Posted by DGrey

I'd try some Horny Goat Weed first...we've had great results with it. D was the same way with only having one shot but not anymore. I take it to combat the dryness and occasional lack of drive from being on the Pill.

E

Are you taking a supplement of pure horny goat weed or one of the brands which includes other herbs like maca? (twin lab and pinnacle for instance)

Also, are you taking it daily or just before recreational athletics?

Horizontal Mambo-ist,
Dante

[Additude]

I just told my Doc that sometimes I can't get it up and the wife is starting to complain and wanted me to ask him about it at this visit. Which is not true, I just wanted recreational hardons.

He gave me several samples each of Viagra and Levitra.....

Then wanted to put me on an ED study....supplying me with free medication. I volunteered, but he later told me the study didn't take place.

He still gives me samples of Viagra when I ask. Levitra gives me a major headache.

Just ask your Doc.

As for the one male orgasm and it's over stuff, I think this is a fact of nature. I mean that's the way nature and evolution has it planned. The normal human male E-Jacks once and that's it.....making way for the next male and so on. There was an episode on Discovery channel, maybe it was the Health channel or something a few years back and said it's natures way of procreation and survival of the strongest.

Human social structure and "Marriage" outlining the rules of sexual intercourse is man made.

I'm sure it's different for each male, some guys naturally orgasm more than once. I watched a guy orgasm 5 times in the course of a couple of hours once.

[Gan]

I was having a rough span of time at work and would come home just exhausted. Mentally as horny as ever, but just not really ready to play. It started to wear on both of us, so I ordered some C. online. Awww man.... didn't go down for the whole weekend and truth to tell, it was getting a little much after the third day. We started making jokes about taking fluid breaks. It was fun to try and a little experimentation over the last year to use up the remaining 5 pills, kinda evened things out a bit.
Like taking a decongestant to avoid the stuffy nose feeling