How Do Ya Know?

[OhioCouple]

Actually I am not asking for advice here, rather I'm offering it....

For reasons I'll not go into, I'd like to just say something, something that everyone (in my opinion) should just say to themselves... "STOP" , that person just might need me.

If you have the opportunity to make the difference in the life of a child. Seize the moment.

If you have the opportunity to make the difference in the lives of your family or the elderly. Seize the moment.

If you have the opportunity to make a difference with your friends, neighbors, community, etc. Seize the moment.

Never forget to Seize the Moment , sometimes you never get more than one chance.

O

[wrnakedru]

Absolutely!

How many times, when an ending has come to a life that many knew the situation - is the phrase heard, " I thought about calling you, but didn't want to intrude at a bad time. And really didn't know what to say."

A call that says "Just wanted you to know I'm thinking of you"
is sometimes just the hug that person needed right at that moment. If it is not the best time, they can thank you for your call and leave it at that. Or you may have called at a time they really needed someone to talk to, but didn't want to impose their situation on any one who may not care to hear it.

How many times, when a tragic circumstance has occurred to a child, have neighbors, parents of classmates, teachers, said "Well, I thought things weren't quite right - but didn't want to cause a problem if none existed." A child who is being mistreated often feels the treatment is what they deserve, because they are "bad". They do not tell anyone about it as they feel they are to blame. There are people trained to investigate. Make that call. The child doesn't know to, most often, and even more often, wouldn't if they did know. They are the first to defend their abuser. Help those who cannot help themselves.

That elderly person who seems so grumpy when you see them at their mailbox - try inviting them in for a glass of lemonade. Chances are your home is cooler than theirs - and they would enjoy the opportunity to see a different set of four walls. How many times at this time of year do we read of the elderly who have passed on in their too hot home, and their passing has gone un-noticed by neighbors for a sad length of time. Find out if that neighbor has relatives, someone who gives them that morning call everyday to say - "How are you feeling this morning." Make yourself that person. One day we may be in a similar situation. Take the initiative. Make a new friend, one who may need you more than you know.

When you see a person out who has obviously taken care in their appearance, compliment them.

When you receive extraordinary customer service, express your appreciation.

If it's really extraordinary, let their boss know.

Takes time? Yup, it does. All of these things take time.

But you will have improved the quality of someone's day - maybe even improved their life.

Guarantee each will improve the quality of our own days - and lives.

Thanks Mrs. O, for reminding us!

[OhioCouple]

Ya, know...you have such a way with words, wrnakedru.

Excellent posting. It conveyed everything that my heart couldn't put into words.

Seizing the moment means more to me now than ever.

'Cause ya just never know....

[wrnakedru]

IF I KNEW

If I knew it would be the last time
That I'd see you fall asleep,
I would tuck you in more tightly
and pray the Lord, your soul to keep.

If I knew it would be the last time
that I see you walk out the door,
I would give you a hug and kiss
and call you back for one more.

If I knew it would be the last time
I'd hear your voice lifted up in praise,
I would video tape each action and word,
so I could play them back day after day.

If I knew it would be the last time,
I could spare an extra minute
to stop and say "I love you,"
instead of assuming you would KNOW I do.

If I knew it would be the last time
I would be there to share your day,
Well I'm sure you'll have so many more,
so I can let just this one slip away.

For surely there's always tomorrow
to make up for an oversight,
and we always get a second chance
to make everything just right.

There will always be another day
to say "I love you,"
And certainly there's another chance
to say our "Anything I can do?"

But just in case I might be wrong,
and today is all I get,
I'd like to say how much I love you
and I hope we never forget.

Tomorrow is not promised to anyone,
young or old alike,
And today may be the last chance
you get to hold your loved one tight.

So if you're waiting for tomorrow,
why not do it today?
For if tomorrow never comes,
you'll surely regret the day,

That you didn't take that extra time
for a smile, a hug, or a kiss
and you were too busy to grant someone,
what turned out to be their one last wish.

So hold your loved ones close today,
and whisper in their ear,
Tell them how much you love them
and that you'll always hold them dear

Take time to say "I'm sorry,"
"Please forgive me," "Thank you," or "It's okay."
And if tomorrow never comes,
you'll have no regrets about today.

[Elusive BiFem]

Another group we need to STOP for is our "bus stop friends."

Bus stop friends are those that pass in and out of our lives daily. People we might stand next to while waiting for the traffic light to change so that we may cross. The person pumping gas next to us. One of the groundskeepers at the local business we visit - maybe he' sweating out there in the 100 degree heat and doesn't even speak English. But just a friendly smile and a nod of appreciation towards the flowers will brighten his face.

Think about it. How many times has your day been brightened by a stranger just momentarily passing through? Mine has. Lots of times.

We may not all have many "great" friends or even family near by. People move, interests change. But we can all have lots of "bus stop friends." Who knows? You and I may be bus stop friends even now. -EBF

[OhioCouple]

EXACTLY, EBF...

I can't tell you how many times that my day was brightened by a warm smile and a nod, or a simple comment. I could have been having the worst of days, and some stranger would just do some itsy, bitsy tiny thing that just made me smile. Almost Immediately my day didn't seem so bad anymore, 'cause I had the warm fuzzies for a moment.

Dwelling on negativity is so very easy to do.

Ever noticed how you can go on and on and on about things for hours, days, weeks, months, even years and then someone can stop all that in a heartbeat with a smile or a kind and simple one sentence comment?

Quick story from my lessons learned.

Next door to me lives two sisters who never married. Just recently they celebrated the eldest's 90th b'day, of which we were invited. I can't even begin to count the people who showed up for it. Cars were lined up throughout the blocks. It almost resembled a county fair or something. They hosted their own party to celebrate not her 90th b'day, but all those that have touched her life and how fortunate she was to have had all these people in it.

I can't count the times that she has just brought over some homemade something or other as a small thank you for changing a light bulb, picking up limbs out of their yard after a storm, (even though they came out of our tree), putting their papers on the chair on their porch so they didn't have to travel down the sidewalks to get it, snow blowing the walks and driveway, raking their yards, cleaning their gutters. It wasn't just us either. The community as a whole just goes by, sees it and it's always a race to see who gets to do it first. *warm smiles* Early morning phone calls that just say. "Can you meet me by the fence?" (Which in our case is the Lilac bushes) just to be welcomed to some fresh baked pastries.

After a more than usual bad winter this year, they made gift boxes for all that had helped them through it. And the eldest insisted on walking each gift to every home that had helped them out over that period of time. She wanted to thank everyone personally. For some she walked nearly two blocks. It's quite something to see a 90 year old, 4 ft 3" woman with an arm load of bags on a mission to deliver. Dressed to the nines.

I wanna be like her when I grow up.

(Okay, I lied about a quick story...but believe me I shortened it.)

[bccpl77]

My eyes are swelling with tears of guilt. You are so right OhioCouple. We do have to seize the momment. I'm tired of all the shoulda, coulda, wouldas. It's my own issues that do this to me. I've been recently battling with myself to go knock on my neihbours door. They are one of the sweetest 70 plus couples that I've met and some of the best neihbours I've ever had the pleasure of having. The husband planted our vegatable garden two years in a row. We didn't even know it then all of a sudden there was corn growing. Then every once and a while we would find a bag of vegetables on our porch. He snowblowed our driveway once but everyday he did his yard he would at least make sure the spot for our garbage cans was clear. His wife always has a sweet smile and friendly words for me. When I asked her what I could do for them she said " Just share the baby". That makes me sadder because I'm aware that they don't have family around these parts. They're lucky if their son and only grandchild can make it out for Christmas. We've had such busy lives that I haven't been able to get to know them all that well but now my life is a little easier and I have no exuse. I guess I don't want to be a bother to them.
I'm going to take this post as a sign and bite the bullet and get to know my neihbours. All of them. I'll take it as a big kick in the butt

[Elusive BiFem]

Originally posted by bccpl77

I'm going to take this post as a sign and bite the bullet and get to know my neihbours. All of them. I'll take it as a big kick in the butt

Don't you just love this Board? Swinging or not - there is so much here to be taken when we need it. - EBF

[bccpl77]

Originally posted by Elusive BiFem
Don't you just love this Board? Swinging or not - there is so much here to be taken when we need it. - EBF

I whole heartedly agree. More that I could ever post to. My post is much shorter than I would have liked. If you can believe that.

[OhioCouple]

Originally posted by bccpl77
I guess I don't want to be a bother to them.

Thing is you probably wouldn't be a bother to them, bccpl. Just the other day, I called them to ask if I could borrow some milk. I hadn't had time for the grocery yet and my recipe called for it. All I needed was 1/3 of a cup. I crossed the 'fence' and they were so delighted that I would even ask. They were getting ready to pour an entire pitcher for us and were giggling when I got there. After two glasses of fresh squeezed lemonade, some homemade cookies and delightful converstation, I left with my borrowed milk. They just were tickled to death that I would call to borrow something. Never mind that dinner was a little later than usual that evening. It was an hour well spent.

It only takes a moment to brighten someones day. And quite often I've found that your day is brighter because of it. I'm a learnin'.

[bccpl77]

Originally posted by OhioCouple
Thing is you probably wouldn't be a bother to them, bccpl.

I know you're right OhioCouple. In fact I'm downright positive. That's why I feel so guilty.
But like I said I'll bite the bullet and let you know how it went. I know it will be good.
Guilt is such an interesting emotion isn't it? Seems the more you try to ignore it the more intense it gets. It keeps you in line and makes you do what's right.

[BradAndJanet]

This is a wonderful thread, everyone!

I hope no one thinks it Pollyanna-ish of me, but I really do believe in, "Practice random acts of kindness and senseless acts of beauty."

It only takes a second to smile at a stranger, give a compliment, hold a door or say, "Thank you!", but it can make a big difference in someone's day if you do. You see, they'll spread it around, and it will come back to you in time.

I've copied the below from the Pay It Forward Foundation website (perhaps you've seen this before):

Trevor, the 12-year-old hero of Pay It Forward, thinks of quite an idea. He describes it to his mother and teacher this way: "You see, I do something real good for three people. And then when they ask how they can pay it back, I say they have to Pay It Forward. To three more people. Each. So nine people get helped. Then those people have to do twenty-seven." He turned on the calculator, punched in a few numbers. "Then it sort of spreads out, see. To eighty-one. Then two hundred forty-three. Then seven hundred twenty-nine. Then two thousand, one hundred eighty-seven. See how big it gets?"

I truly believe in this philosophy, and it literally brings tears to my eyes when I think of how wonderful this idea is! You see, life is hard enough with all the obstacles that are thrown in our path by the whims of fate. Why should we make it more difficult for each other? We could do so much more for the human condition if we would just make the attempt to help each other through it. It's easy, really, as illustrated above.

Mrs. O, you make a good point too, about making sure that you tell those close to you that you love them, every chance you get. Like the poem wrnakedru posted, you just never know.

So, with that in mind, let me just say, "I love you all!", my friends. Now, let's go out and do some good for somebody!

-B

[OhioCouple]

Originally posted by bccpl77
.... I'm tired of all the shoulda, coulda, wouldas.

This sentence has been gnawing at my mind all day.

Only I remember it as in a bit of reverse sequence..."shoulda, woulda, coulda". Chuck Barris wrote a book a kazillion years ago, ya know the guy who hosted and created The Gong Show. (Does that date me or what? lol) The book was titled "You and me Babe". I was fourteen when I read that book. I remember 'cause it was 1975 when we moved from Colorado to Ohio, and the week before we left, we spent it in Estes Park. I bought that book to take with me. I must have read it ten times during that week. The story is one in which a man meets and falls in love with a woman while they are dirt poor and then he suddenly becomes rich and famous through his creation of game shows and it detracted from his everday life with his family and friends. He became so wrapped up in the importance of 'who he was' rather than what he 'should have been'. The feeling of importance empowered him to achieve more, and the more he did so, the less important those around him became. The bitter reality was that he lost what was most important to him. His wife and daughter and all of his 'common' friends, because they no longer felt they held importance in his life. His realization, when he was left alone, was that he had all the money to make him comfortable for life, many times over, yet his life was so empty as he didn't have any true friends or his family. His reflection was 'shoulda, woulda, coulda'...if he'd only known how it would all turn out...

I have to wonder today, if it wasn't a reflection of his own life.

[Elusive BiFem]

Originally posted by BradAndJanet
This is a wonderful thread, everyone!

I hope no one thinks it Pollyanna-ish of me, but I really do believe in, "Practice random acts of kindness and senseless acts of beauty."

So, with that in mind, let me just say, "I love you all!", my friends. Now, let's go out and do some good for somebody!

-B

And I hope you think it is OK if I think you are Pollyanna-ish because I think that is one of the greatest things you can be.

For me...at night...when I finally put my head on the pillow to sleep...if I've had a Pollyanna day, I sleep well. And I know others do, too.

So here is a huge Texas hug to one of my best Pollyanna-ish friends, Mr. B.

[jen]

I am sitting here, this time not with my head tilted to one side, but with my heart so full and so warmed from these posts and the kindness they express.

I'm in awe and feel so inspired by the good hearts I encounter here on this board.



please imagine really cute pinkish colored heart beating here

The special people who actually do - exactly what these posts "speak"...for me everyday.

Its great to go somewhere everybody knows your name.

There has been so much kindness aimed my way that has come just straight from the heart... it amazes me. I smile so big from so many of you daily...what an awesome feeling.

I have to stop cause I'm getting melty...

Thank you.

please imagine being squeezed!!

Squeeze