Wanting to move at a slower pace than my spouse

[Additude]

Well, it appears this is one "Level" the two of you do not connect on.

Looking at this objectively, I would say that if your man loved you, then he would understand and work with you on this situation. However it seems your man loves swinging more than you and is not willing to work you through it.

What I mean is, for me, if I were the man in your relationship, I think my mentality would be to take it at your pace understanding that your comfort level will increase over time and with that possibility as time goes on you would then understand my needs more and we could meet somewhere in the middle. Especially if I had discovered the love of my life in you, someone I connected with on so many levels.

Unless your man changes his staunch position on this subject you have four choices.

1. Give in and swing at his pace. No complaints if you give in tho.

2. Come to an understanding / agreement with him about your swinging relationship.

3. Keep on fighting about it and make yourself and him miserable destroying your love for each other.

4. Seperate from your current relationship with him.

It appears to me #1 doesn't work for you personally and #2 isn't going to work for the both of you. #3 is what your doing now....and that isn't working obviously.