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bear_and_babe

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    216
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About bear_and_babe

  • Rank
    Swingers Board Addict

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    Couple
  • Location
    PA
  • Interests
    Working on our house, yard work, walking, reading, fine dining, crusing and just haning out
  • Occupation
    Bear is a computer geek and Babe is a stay at home mom
  • Swinging Experience
    2 + years

Swinger Info

  • SLS Name
    bear_and_babe
  • Favorite Club(s)
    The Farm Travel Club, The Cottage

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  1. It could be that he does not have just one reason to get out of the lifestyle. It could be a lot of little things that have added up to his decision and he is having a problem figuring out how to voice that. I am also thinking of getting out of the lifestyle and I can not come up with just one reason. For me it is a lot of small things that have added up to how I feel about things. I think you are right in how you are going to handle this. I know that Bear will support me in my decision, no matter what it is. Our communication has also improved with the lifestyle and I know that is the one positive thing that we will keep. Good luck!
  2. Don't worry Prettylady, I am in the same boat you are. I will never be the classic beauty, but damn it I am cute! And I am ok with that. Bear loves me no matter what. But when it really comes down to it, looks are in the eye of the beholder. What is pretty to one person may not be so pretty to another.
  3. On my side of the family, my one brother knows we are in the lifestyle, he is also. But I will never tell my other brother, he would not understand and really get on my case about it. My step-mom knows. She figured it out on her own. She even wants to come to the club with us. That would be too strange! And I never want my dad knowing. He still thinks I am a virgin. My best friend knows, and would really like to get into the lifestyle also, but she just lives it through me. On Bears side of the family, his sister knows and she also wants to try our club, but her new husband is not ready for that. They had a lot of questions, and were supportive of our choice to be in the lifestyle. No one else in his family knows, and that is how it will stay. It would just cause me problems as they have never liked me from the start. Bear did tell his best friend that we are in the lifestyle and he did not speak to us for a year. He asked a few questions, then just stopped listening to the answers. Instead of trusting us and listening to what we had to say, he just believed all the vanilla misconceptions about swinging. He said some very nasty things to us, so losing him as a friend was not all that hard. He has since tried to come back into our lives, but I am just not ready to forgive. If a vanilla friend were to ask me if I was in the lifestyle, then I would not lie, but I don't feel the need to come out to everyone.
  4. When I first learned about the lifestyle, from good friends of ours, my first reaction was that they were going to ruin their marriage. So for me my biggest misconception was that the lifestyle was only for people who were looking for something that was missing in their marriage or that their marriage was not going so well. But most of the couples I have met in the lifestyle have very strong marriages.
  5. I have to ditto Tybee Swing on this. I like a smaller penis. Bear is very big around and sometimes we have to wait 2 or 3 days between playing because I get too sore. As long as I can tell the guy is in me, then that is big enough for me!
  6. I have read almost everything else on PCOS. But until you walk in my shoes, or anyone else who had PCOS you really don't know what you are talking about. I have busted my ass trying to loose weight, and yes I do eat right, I have been following a diabetic diet for years. Saying that weight loss will help things is true, but with this insidious disease loosing weight is so much harder then it is for the normal person. Not only do I have to deal with the weight problem, I have had to deal with infertility, miscarriage after miscarriage (x6) and now the worst thing to happen, I have developed diabetes, do to no fault of my own. This damn disease is the cause of my problems. There is nothing I can do about it. So with all due respect, please stop trying to be an arm chair doctor and telling Poly Cystic women that the root of their problem would just go away if they lost weight.
  7. Intensity_too- I am so sorry that you have this horrible disease. I know how hard it is when people give you the looks thinking if they would just stop eating they would lose weight. Unless you have this disease you really don't understand what our issues are.
  8. So far I have kept my big mouth shut on this thread, until now. But I agree with ShellyM on this. I am a larger woman, I know I have posted that before. But SuAndBud I would like to inform you about some of us "fat" people. I happen to have a "medical condition" that one of the side effects is being overweight. I have been fighting this condition for more then 25 years. I have PCOS. Even my new family Dr. did not know what this was. And like I told him, I will bet you that you eat more for breakfast then I eat all day. I have no appitite to speak of, if I could eat a salad every day for the rest of my life I would be happy. But due to low blood sugar, I can't do that. Bear gets worried about me because he thinks I don't eat enough. I do exercise, but due to my condition I don't loose weight. I would never wish this condition on anyone. I not only have to deal with everyone thinking I eat way too much, I also have to deal with a host of other side effects of this condition. I am telling you all this in the hopes that you might learn that not every fat person is that way because of what they eat or because they don't exercise. Not every fat person lives on McDonalds and candy. Not every fat person is fat by their own hand. Some of us were handed a raw deal with our genes. But I will agree that a lot of overweight people do it to themselves. Just not everyone. As for swinging, I understand that not everyone will find me attractive, and that is ok. I don't find everyone I meet attractive either. To each his own.
  9. Bear and I are that couple also. We can talk to anyone, but are also having trouble "making that turn". There have been times where we talked to a couple all night, and just when we say we have to leave then they say something like, "Aw, we were hoping you would want to play". So I guess we are not the only ones having this problem. I will be very interested in what others say to turn the conversation to playing.
  10. I like it when a guy tells me he is getting ready to cum. I don't mind it in my mouth, but I don't swallow. To me it is like swallowing a big raw oyster! YUCK!! I usually just let it run down my hand and like another poster said just use it for more lube to keep stroking. With Bear I can always tell when he is going to cum. I will sometimes swallow him if I know it is going to be a small load.
  11. It is very hard to turn someone down without making them feel bad. We also struggle with what to say. The only thing we have come up with that is the truth and something that people really can't argue with is, "Sorry, but we just don't feel that we have a sexual spark". And depending if we like the couple, we might say something to the fact that we really like them, but we just need that spark that is missing. Then again, any rejection is going to hurt.
  12. 1. Do you use the same email address to surf adult/swinger websites that you use for your family? No, we have a separate email address for our swing activities 2. Do you post facial nude pictures on sites where they can be seen without any sort of joining process (ie. in your Yahoo Profile)? We have face photos on our SLS account, but not full nude photos. After reading this thread I went and checked on our Yahoo Profile and we did post a face photo, so I did take that down. 3. Would you post said facial nude pictures in combination with information stating that you swing someplace (like a Yahoo profile) where people can see it without any sort of joining process (free or otherwise). No, we do not post any full nude photos anywhere. However after reading this I did go back to our Yahoo Profile and took off any reference to the Lifestyle. 4. Do you use your real names (as a username or as part of your email address) when dealing with people online in regards to adult activities? We use our real first names at the club and when emailing people who are in the Lifestyle, but use our nick names in our email address. I guess we are very naïve we just don’t worry if someone finds our names connected with the Lifestyle. Some of our family knows that we are swingers, my brother is even in the Lifestyle. My father is the only person I don’t want knowing what we do and it is very doubtful that he will ever find out. We do have a teenage son and if he were ever to find out, then we would just be upfront with him about it. We don’t really worry too much about Bear’s job finding out either; he is not in a position where it would affect him. Besides, he works with geeks and most of them would think it is cool! I am a stay-at-home-mom right now so I don’t worry about it. But I agree that we should be a little more careful with our public profiles.
  13. I refer to myself as being a BBW. For me it is just a discriptive term to give a general idea of body type. I am comfortable with myself, but I also understand that not everyone likes us big women. But I guess I should do what Dave suggests and be truthful and call myself a BCW (Big,Cute,Woman). I will never be beautiful, but I am cute!
  14. You are right, you are not being politically correct, but who cares? You are attracted to who and what body type you are attracted to. As a BBW I understand that some people will not be attracted to me, but that is cool, there are enough people that are. There is no reason that anyone has to play with someone they don't find attractive. If big, skinny, short, tall, black, white, purple or whatever is not your cup of tea there is no reason to force yourself to go there.
  15. Cost is one of the factors in our decision to keep our swing activities at swing clubs. I know a lot of people knock clubs, but we have found that it is more cost effective for us. If we go on a Friday night the cost is under $50. We tried the "one-on-one" dating and just got tired of getting stood up and all the hassle to set up a time and place to meet. And when we go to a club, even if we don't play Bear and I have a good time dancing, playing pool, hanging out in the hot tub and just being together. I know not everyone is into clubs or even have a club close by. I guess we are lucky that it only takes us 15 min. to get to ours.
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