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ref2018

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ref2018 last won the day on December 12 2013

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About ref2018

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  • Birthday 12/06/1970

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  1. Yikes... So much sex-negativity around this topic. Did you ask the question because you wanted real answers from real people, or because you wanted to be reassured you're not a freak? Would it help you feel better about yourself if I told you I'm 43 and the first time I squirted was a little over a year ago? Why is it such a blow to your self-esteem? I recommend looking within yourself and figuring out what the real reason/s are why this is such a big deal to you. I certainly don't think that there's anything wrong with you because you haven't squirted yet. I thought this was just a fun topic to discuss. It's unfortunate that you let this bother you so much. Should the rest of us stop talking about it? You're welcome. No one here has suggested that "thing" shouldn't be washed before it "goes any other place". You're SUPPOSED to wash "things" that go in "that place" because even if you can't see, hear, or smell the poop, there are bacteria in the lower digestive tract that can cause vaginal infections. I mentioned it in conjunction with a comment someone else made, not to try to tell you what you should or shouldn't do. I am truly sorry this disturbs you. I'm sure no one intended for that to happen.
  2. Giving/receiving love to/from more than one other person doesn't have to be "equal" and it doesn't have to be understood by everyone (especially people who are not part of the relationship) in order to be possible. If it's not your thing, don't do it, but just because some people can't wrap their mind around something doesn't render it false or illusory. I often see poly people saying the same thing about swinging: They just don't understand how one can have sex WITHOUT giving/receiving love. I am not either of those people. I can be in love with more than one person at the same time, and I can also enjoy sex with someone without being in love with them.
  3. This debate/argument about pee versus squirt and how someone gets annoyed by it being brought up "every" time squirting gets mentioned reminds me of a similar pet-peeve of mine. It's kind of hijacky, but I don't feel like starting a new thread, although if people really want to talk about it more, it could be split off into its own thread. More often than not, when I see a post (usually on reddit but other places too) about butt-secks, the person is concerned about (as Jack Morin delicately phrases it) "encountering feces". 100% of the time that gets asked, at least 2 people will say something like, "Don't worry, there won't be any poop because poop isn't stored in the rectum, it just passes through the rectum. Take a dump and wash your butt before you have anal sex and you won't get any poop on your hand/penis/whatever." I can tell those people have read more than they have experienced, because my personal experience has been that you WILL "encounter feces" regularly-to-occasionally unless you do a lot of other things to prepare in advance. I've actually had people downvote my posts and/or argue about it as if I dared point out something no one wants to admit. My poop may not smell like your poop, but they both smell like poop. No other body fluid/product smells like poop. Similarly, every woman's squirt and every man's cum may not smell or taste like every other woman's squirt/man's cum, but urine smells like urine. Cum and squirt alone do not smell/taste like urine, ever (if they do, it's because there is urine mixed in there TOO). There is a huge difference between pissing the bed and having a small amount of pee come out during a squirt-gasm. If you want to prove it to yourself, get a woman to squirt onto a towel, and have her pee on another towel. Place each towel into a zip-lock bag, close the bags, and wait about half a day. Open the bags and smell them (for extra fun, use identical towels and bags and don't label them). You will have no trouble distinguishing which one is the squirty-towel and which one is the pee-pee towel. That should satisfy both the curious and the skeptical. Or you could just take my word for it.
  4. I don't use the term "poly", I use "open relationship", but what I have does fit the definition of "polyamory". However, we are not all involved with each other, which is something quite a few people in my experience assume to be a "condition" of polyamorous relationships. Not everyone has even met everyone else yet, and things have been going on for years.
  5. Re: Squirting vs peeing "Squirt" gushes out all at once and has little to no odor. Pee trickles out and can sometimes be halted if noticed in time. It has the odor of pee. I used to wonder the same thing. There is definitely a difference and it's easy to notice if you've experienced them separately, and looked at/smelled the towels or sheets afterward. Yes, sometimes a little pee gets in with the squirt but especially if you have a really full bladder. #anterior fornix
  6. Oh i see. You are part of the Volunteer Internet Police Department. I just did you a favor and reported your post to the moderators in case they are looking for help running the forum. You can report problem posts that you feel are in violation of the rules by clicking on the little triangle with the exclamation point located in the bottom left corner of every post. Also, you spelled "grooovy" wrong.
  7. These lists sound a lot like what I take with me when I visit First Boyfriend. ("First" is not hierarchical, it is temporal)
  8. I did, but i spelled it with 3 O's. You cannot have too many O's.
  9. One of the things that makes this forum great is the wide variety of perspectives about all sorts of things. I think it's grooovy when people share their own point of view without feeling the need to scold someone else for sharing theirs.
  10. I think it is much more likely to happen and be successful later in life after experiencing a long-term relationship and/or familiar with alternative lifestyles than it is for someone in their 20's with limited experience in those areas. And OMG I just said an age-ism so i must need a spanking or maybe i need my spanking withheld.
  11. It's also great to spread on your toast like butter, and to make popcorn. But not if you have a tree-nut allergy. It will also dissolve things made of or containing latex.
  12. haha that crossed my mind just as your post scrolled onto the screen.
  13. I use the label "bi" as short-hand, but I actually feel more like a Lesbian "visually" and more like a Gay man "mentally". That means that I am attracted to and superficially "lust after" women's bodies, but I tend to connect better with men socially and intellectually. I have found that same je ne sais quois with women, but most of the time it hasn't led to more than infatuation (there was one that went "all the way" but alas the timing was fucked up and it was not meant to be). Men - I can name exactly ONE in my whole life (my current "newer" boyfriend) whose BODY is eye-candy to my brain; OTOH, I gravitate toward women with body-types similar to my own (which is somewhat narcissistic on my part, but in the best possible way), but if there's no click between our personalities, the initial attraction doesn't last long enough to go anywhere substantial. So yeah, "bi" it is. "Pansexual" sounds like I'm trying to make a "statement" or something.
  14. Right; I figured it might come in handy for future reference. So, "HWP" is really euphemism for "no fat people"?
  15. Height/Weight Proportional. There is a thing at the top of the site that says "Swinger Info". Click on that, and the FAQ, and there is a lot of basic stuff, including but not limited to a Glossary, that will bring you up to speed on vocabulary, etiquette, and site usage. You can also enter acronyms into Google and it usually brings up at least one or two Urban Dictionary-type pages that have the answers you seek. (and it seems that this site is programmed to hot-link certain words automatically. I didn't put those URLs in on purpose.)
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