GFE - Prostitution In The Lifestyle, Part II

[Spoomonkey]

LikeMinds made a comment that was really thought provoking for me (she is kind of good at that) on this thread.

I thought it deserved its own thread, so here it is.

If prostitution were legalized, how do you think this would affect the lifestyle - and how would those changes affect your experience with the lifestyle?

Personally, I think it would water down the club experience to say the least. If more women used the club as a place to conduct business - or if more women came as guests of men who had paid for their company - it would take away the excitement of really connecting with "real people".

What do you think?

Spoomonkey

PS - To clarify the terms: YMMV means "Your Mileage May Vary". I've seen it around here, but apparently it is a term used in prostitution that means that a "provider" might give you more or less "attention" based on chemistry and/or mood. GFE means "Girl Friend Experience" - or "I do a good job of pretending like I actually like you" - which I think would be one of the "watering down" affects of prostitution in swinging. Other interesting jargon can be found here which is where I found it... I swear...

[warkman]

We haven't taken the plunge yet, so I'm speculating that much more than a veteran, but I don't think the legalization of prostitution would necessarily be detrimental to swing clubs. It would be up to the individual club owners whether to allow that activity or not. I don't know if club owners would be attracted to taking a "consignment fee" or not. I personally wouldn't want to attend a club that would allow that. As Like Minds said, it diminishes the free social sex atmosphere of the situation. The whole point of swinging is being around and possibly connecting with folks that like the idea of recreational sex and not business sex. I would think some clubs would allow it, and some wouldn't. I would choose the clubs that wouldn't. Spoo's scenario of a guy arriving at a club with working girl in tow poses an interesting situation. Is it that guy's responsibility to pay her for all the other people she might have sex with?? What if he's pimping her? That seems like a really bad mix. If I were a club owner, I wouldn't allow it.

[Spoomonkey]

Originally Posted by warkman

It would be up to the individual club owners whether to allow that activity or not.

I think that it might just increase the number of clubs - and it would probably increase their visibility (which would suck). There would probably be clubs that focused specifically on that niche - know what I mean?

"Real" swing clubs would probably be even more private, and if they chose not to entertain prostitution, members would inevitably spend more time than is comfortable explaining to newbies (particularly single males who have gone to the "Pay Per Swing" clubs) that - no - my wife is not for sale...

Who knows - maybe they'd come up with a "not a hooker" handshake

Spoomonkey

[warkman]

Originally Posted by Spoomonkey

Who knows - maybe they'd come up with a "not a hooker" handshake

Spoomonkey

Yeah, I just don't get it. Most of the interest and excitement for me comes from finding someone who is as sexually attracted to me as I am to them. When it's not about money, I would think it much more gratifying - it's way hotter. Sex for money has its place, but not (imho) in a swing club.

[ANGEDKY(mr)]

Having managed an establishment (in my past adventures) were the lines between brothel, strip club and waterfront tavern blurred, my take on it is that the lifestyle would actually improve.

You would be completely and utterly amazed at the number of guys that stop by to get a couple of beers and to look at some pussy and (more often than not) a BJ if the mood strikes. All in the name of a cold beer after work. If you include the theories of supply and demand associated with legalized prostitution, here is what will happen. You now have a place where all the single guy's of questionable honor will congregate, plus all the cheating males and, not to mention, a certain percentages of the swinging rookies. recall just how often around here do we see the question, "What about getting an escort".

About a million and one brothels will pop up all over the place. They, like the adult toy/video store industry will span a range of classiness. From the 1000/hour Nevada type to the 20 dollar sticky floor places. Most, if not all will include a liquor liscense and that is where all the people we bitch about will gravitate to. Booze + $$$ = certainty of sexual activity

Who is left for the clubs? Us folks ,like the membership here , that want a little more than just 3.2 nano seconds (and a $20) to a wet noodle! I am sure there will be some club owners that try to incorporate both, but they will soon either fold or turn to straight whore houses for the same reasons listed in the other thread.

Think about it, which does society have more knowledge of, prostitution or swinging? Open the legal door and the common thought will be to gravitate either to prostitution (leaving us alone) or shun it. Those that shun it will either be the type we want to swing with, or morally replused and stay home (out of our hair). Thus the swinging life improves..win-win

[graygo98]

I agree with ANGDKY. If prostitution were legalized a new sort of bar/club venue would likely spring up to cater to people looking for true no strings sex in a non-threatening environment. But it wouldn't be a swing club, more like those "hostess bars" you see on the continent.

While there may be people that might hire a "date" so that they can be a part of the "swinging scene" I see the two communities -- swingers and guys who buy sex -- as being two different worlds. And why would a working girl go a club to ply her trade? I can't imagine she would have many (any?) takers. Better to hang out in the bar of a convention hotel.

A gifted Canadian journalist (Geroge Jonas) once wrote that prostitution wasn't about selling sex, but rather selling the "illusion of affection." In days gone by I went to my share of strip clubs and that sure seemed to be what the regulars were paying for. They would bring little gifts and remember birthdays , she would ask how his problem with his boss or wife was going... as the mark forked over $20 a song for a lap dances. I am sure that is also the motivation behind the GFE.

How many true lifestylers hunger for the "illusion of affection"? Most that we have met already are in exceptionally close and affectionate relationships. At least, the ones we seem to be most attracted to are.

[Spoomonkey]

Originally Posted by ANGEDKY(mr)

Having managed an establishment (in my past adventures) were the lines between brothel, strip club and waterfront tavern blurred, my take on it is that the lifestyle would actually improve.

Read this paragraph alone and I would have said, "you're nuts!"

But this post, and GrayGo's, that follows are thought provoking to say the least.

I wouldn't have thought of it that way in a million years. Put these together with Good Times post in the other thread (yeah, I am thinking starting two threads was pretty dumb - but what can I say? I'm a monkey?) I would say that so far the position of legal prostitution actually improving the lifestyle as a whole is pretty compelling.

Great discussion! Thanks for making me think!

Spoomonkey

[kush2112]

For us it would ruin the whole thing and we would give up on clubs 100%. What a turn-off it would be to have people like that come to clubs.

[good times]

I think that your assumption that if prostitution were legalized it would not be regulated or would be allowed in swingers clubs would not be the case. In fact, if it were ever to be more widely legalized the main reason for legalization is so that it could be regulated more and taxed of course. So if prostitution were to be legalized my guess is it would only be legal in licensed brothels similar to the way it is now in Nevada. So my opinion is that it would have no impact on swinging at all as the only prostitutes at the swingers clubs would be operating illegally as they are now.

[SW_PA_Couple]

Prostitution is legal in The Nederlands. The swinging lifestyle is very much alive in that country.

M

[BradAndJanet]

The way I see it, the only thing we lose are the towel sharks...

[Tybee Swing]

Originally Posted by warkman

Most of the interest and excitement for me comes from finding someone who is as sexually attracted to me as I am to them. When it's not about money, I would think it much more gratifying - it's way hotter.

I agree, and I think this is how most swingers feel. What attracts most swingers to swinging isn't something you can buy. It's hardly ever about just sex and only sex, it's also about the mutual attraction, connecting, the pursuit, etc. Most couples really like to connect with other couples. Most of us like genuine sex with people who are truly enjoying the experience. If we knew a partner was just there for the $$, it would be a turn-off for a lot of people.

I can see one way that prostitution would work for some couples, and that's to obtain the ever-popular FMF threesome with an attractive, bi, and single female. In fact, that's what we've seen on HBO, on that show about the Bunny Ranch - quite a few couples going there for a threesome.

I don't see how combining prostitution and swinging under one roof would be a good idea, though! Two very different motivations, it seems.

[sereneiders]

I guess it's very simple. If the club fee to enter (moreover for single males) exceeds the budget needed to hire a prostitute and pay the hotel room, then you won't have prostitution in swingers clubs.

[Tybee Swing]

Originally Posted by sereneiders

I guess it's very simple. If the club fee to enter (moreover for single males) exceeds the budget needed to hire a prostitute and pay the hotel room, then you won't have prostitution in swingers clubs.

$100-$200 and up for a cover charge to get in? I think that a swing club charging that kind of entrance fee would be out of business on the first week.

[singleagain]

kush2112 wrote "For us it would ruin the whole thing and we would give up on clubs 100%. What a turn-off it would be to have people like that come to clubs."

I am a single male. The new "friend" I have accompanies me to a couple of different clubs on occasion and we enjoy ourselves immensly. Prior to meeting her my trips to clubs were limited to certain nights and not much activity as I would be one of many average single males available to the few couples there. Let me hasten to add that I have been a swinger for almost 30 years and prior to my wife's demise I personally had never experienced the kind of rejection I get as a single guy, even by some of the same people we used to swing with. As soon as I showed up with a woman on my arm I was suddenly accepted again. All the clubs I attend have a "no prostitution" policy so I am very discrete and do not tell them that my new "friend" recevies several things of value for her time with me at the club. First, she gets to swing which she enjoys very much. Second she get the protection of a male escorting her so she doesn't worry about getting hit on by the dreaded "single guy". And third, she earns a sizable amount of money with which she supports herself and her infant daughter. There are several advantages for me as well. I'll leave all of them to your imaganation as I can see the flames coming now, anyway. For me, having a GFE prostitute on my arm when I show up at a club allows me to continue to live the lifestyle with a person I enjoy being with. For her, she earns a living while she gets all the recreational sex she wants. By the way, she never gets paid from anyone but me and she never approaches others at the clubs asking for money for sex.

With all that said, I think that allowing prostitution in a swingers club is generally a bad idea. With the exception of Nevada it would be illegal. That means police raids, arrests and public exposure for all included. Remember, we are in the minority. Most people think we are obssesive perverts.