The Lifestyle of Luxury???

[frenzb4sex]

I realize that not every one can go out and do things all the time, not only because of the trials of getting sitters, but also because the amount of money that is needed for this lifestyle. When considering what we term a normal night on the town with someone, we will spend probably between 75-100, when including dinner, drinks, and sitter costs. When you throw in a hotel room or a club, the price jumps up another 50-75 dollars.

We recently had been in contact with some of our friends that we hadn't touched base with in a while. We have known them for a couple of years now, and they used to go out with us every so often. There was a few parties that they used to attend and we went to one of them, and they weren't there. Lately, they have been a little distant with us. We were just wondering if they were taking a break, if it was us they were not interested any longer, or if it was just a coincidence, since we normally at least touched base every couple of weeks.

What we learned was that they hadn't done anything lifestyle wise for about two months. They said "while swinging is a helluva lot of fun, it's just too expensive of a ticket for us!"

The wife and I discussed this, and while we never have been to the point of not being able to spend things on necessities and bills if we do something lifestyle-wise, we do understand that sometimes having costs like this can be a burden on people. As they were under the impression that the "experience" entailed much of the things I listed above (i.e. a date), we talked to them about just getting together at our houses, hanging out, eating in, and just relaxing. They had said that no one really ever mentioned this to them, they felt like they all had to be "wined and dined" to even just be there with them. I found this a funny thought, because we have never been the type that has to go through certain motions, number one, just to hang out and get to know people, and two, because we don't consider ourselves "daters" in this lifestyle either.

Do you find that you are spending a lot of money in this? Has this limited you in your activity? Do you find yourself doing alternative things within the lifestyle to circumvent spending as much money (i.e meeting at home more often and cooking out, etc., or even possibly meeting at home and not therefore having to get a sitter, etc.)? Have you seen it where people have taken a step back just because the price tag, to them, was a little high? Is what we have experienced with this couple just an exception to the rule?

I don't consider that this lifestyle is necessarily one that you have to be well off to participate in, I am just trying to see from the masses if people have run into this in their swinging experience prior to as well, either personally, or through observation.

Tim

Swinging definately cost us more than hanging out with our Vanilla friends. It doesnt really limit the amount we swing but it definately costs more. We are not well off but arent living in a box either. Kinda middle of the road.

[TNT]

Sometimes we spend a lot of money on our nights out, but at other times we just meet at a friends house for pizza or home cooking. Not a whole lot of outlay, but a whole lot of fun.

[OhioCouple]

I would say that the first year or so we spent quite a bit of money. It was nothing to drop 75-200 for an evening/over night out, just to meet folks. Many times that included a hotel as the distance was better than 3 hours to drive home and it made no sense to be doing so at midnight. At that time tho, we did not want to meet up with anyone in our immediate area. When we felt comfortable meeting those closer to us, clubs came into the equation and pretty much cost about the same as it did before, however we were able to sleep in our own beds. We have now narrowed it down to only meeting with people that we either already know or those that we have a VERY strong interest in. I guess you would say that we have found a niche that works for us and while we don't go away often, the times that we do makes the money seem well spent.

I'm sure money is a huge factor for many folks with the economy the way it has been and it doesn't surprise me that the swinging form of entertainment would be one of the first to be curtailed. As for opening up your home to having others over, that is a choice to be heavily considered. For us we have to know them very well in order to invite them to our home and we would expect others to feel the same about opening theirs. It's a great alternative, if all are comfortable with it.

[Alura]

If you discount the cost of driving half-way across the country to a Meet Up! we don't spend much at all. Even the times we went to Dallas and Indy, we were able to turn them into business trips. The time we went to Dayton, the Meet Up! was sort of a side benefit while on a family trip to visit vanilla friends who also live there. We stayed with our vanilla friends so didn't even have a hotel cost, except en route, of course.

We don't much care for bars and we never go out dancing so that's an expense we don't normally incur, anyway. We don't go to clubs.

In our playing experience, we've always played at our house or our friends'. We don't do that to save money, although it's a nice benefit; we'd just rather play at home.

We're just old hick Okie fuddy-duddies!

Alura

[TXBLONDIE]

We think it's more expensive than just hanging out with "just friends". With couples, it seems the men are always trying to see who can pay first to impress the other couple, when really it's not about who spends the most money. Yes, if you choose to have your encounters at hotels that can be quite costly as well but who decides who pays? The invitor or the invitee? Seems like dating to me in a sense, but why not meet singles/couples that you can be up front with about who pays for what, just like being up front about your boundaries? We agreed to meet a couple at a swinging club that cost us $50.00 to get in because we are not members. Of course it was BYOB but they charged $1.00 for each setup. We waited for three hours and were stood up by the other couple. Never been stood up in our life, not even in highschool. But, would we take the chance again? Yes, we would. We would change a few things that I don't want to get into but, in this lifestyle, it's all about timing. I agree it's more expensive than the "normal" lifestyle, but then again, aren't we gaining alot more because of it????
HMMMMMM?????
Blondie and Mikie

[Joe_Ang]

We got ourselves into trouble spending money on socials and sitters last summer. We definately had to learn to limit our weekends. Our main club does allow a discount for setting up or tearing down, so we try to take advantage of this as often as possible, of course this just adds some time to the sitter costs... Definately not a cheap lifestyle, but moviegoing is not that much greater anymore.

[HotCoupleGnS]

We luckily save on sitters. My sister & I switch off every other weekend. But we haven't really gone out that much & did't really realize that it was so much! We are getting ready to go out & meet a new couple this weekend & we are finding out that it is expensive! The first couple we met off the internet, luckiyl, had small kids like us. So we could go hang out at their house & take our kids. They played together, & then would go to sleep together. This won't work much onger b/c our kids are getting older (3 & 1) but it sure was nice!

[good times]

I guess we are the lucky ones here. It costs us $35.00 (per couple) to get in to the club which includes well and draft drinks. The club is a ten minute drive from our house. We usually tip the bar tender $5.00. So our swinging night out usually costs us less than $50.00. In contrast if we go out with our vanilla friends $100.00 is often gone in a flash.

[JustAskJulie]

When going to the clubs most of the clubs we ever went to were BYOB with setups provided. So that's about $20 for drinks for the night. Then about $40 to get into the club, so that's $60. The clubs were all at least 2-3 hours away so tack on the price to rent a hotel room.... brings us to $160, dinner, breakfast in the morning.... $200 for the weekend, easily.

Now change that to just meeting a couple locally and you are looking at dinner out ... $30-40. on a rare occasion we might follow that with a trip to a local club/bar and add on another $30-40 in drinks.

I'd say if you have a club locally (so that you don't have to rent a room for the night) you definately have the advantage when it comes to cost. But I have always looked at it as a chance to get away... and you have to look at it regarding what works for you in regards to the cost and ROI. Some would look at it and if they put out that money to go to a club and get a room then didn't get laid they'd be pissed. But you can't go into it thinking that way. If you do then you may as well just go out and buy a hooker for the night. However, if you look at it as a nice night away from real life and some special time with your honey then it becomes much more worthwhile.

Granted there are few who can afford to do that every week or even every month. But that's not the only way to meet others or to swing.


Admission to Swing Club: $50
Hotel Room: $100
Drinks: $50

Seeing your spouse with a look of pure enjoyment/ contentment: Priceless.

[Alura]

Here's our favorite "encounter evening."

Out to dinner with our favorite couple, back to our place for an evening dip in the pool, a game of spin the spouse, sometimes still in the pool, inside the house for some "mixing it up," some spa relaxation and perhaps some more playing.

Dinner out: $30.00
Minus dinner if only us: 30.00
Extra cost for swinging: $00.00

Our favorite price!!!


Alura

[midnight hour]

It is a little costly for us but we only go to the social once a month and we turn it into our night if nothing else...after 10 years of not being able to go away from home overnight these wknds are precious to us..so Mr. Midnight works one night overtime and that usually covers it..<around 180 total out he makes about 220 overtime> We do talk and chat with couples in our hometown..so far no one has stood out as the one couple though. When we do the MFM the male is nice enough to pay for the room so that helps.

Midnight Hour

[Greg & Sheryl]

Originally Posted by frenzb4sex

Do you find yourself doing alternative things within the lifestyle to circumvent spending as much money?

Yes! Currently, we have not been to a swing club in several months for that specfic reason. As an alternative, we are occasionally inviting other couples to our home. We don't have any kids, so babysitting is not an issue for us. This is allowing us to save enough money for our biggest annual expense in swinging: attending the Lifestyles West Convention in Las Vegas.

Originally Posted by TXBLONDIE

With couples, it seems the men are always trying to see who can pay first to impress the other couple.

We wish we could find some of these couples. Greg would be quite willing to let the other gentlemen pay!