Rocky146

I would like to thank all of you for posting replies to my post. It has made for some great insightful thinking on the most part. All I can ask of all you couples and ladies out there especially is to judge me on my own merits and not those of predators, opportunists, or just down right rude men. I am my own man with my own feelings, with my own outlook on life. I do not consider a lady that has sex with more then one man or swinging to be a whore. She is a lady first with an open mind and I assume intellect for the good things in life. I have read replies where men stood around stroking waiting to go in for the kill like a bunch of vultures. This is so wrong! A lady should have the choice as to who she invites in to partake of her fruits and that includes her partner. These men that do this to women should be joining gang bang clubs and not swinger clubs. Now I have told a few of you that I am not a bad boy type. I do not dress that part and do not like that persona that such these type of men portray. But it has been my experience that women mostly prefer these type of men in general over men that are good natured and respectful of the lady. Bad boy types for the most part like to have women as conquest and not as a lover or friend. Then women complain how bad men are based on these types. Not all men who dress the part of bad boys are predators though; there must be a few good men to be had. In closing, I respect each and every one of you for the feelings you have posted in response to my post. I may not agree with every one of those replies, but they are your feelings and I respect that. After all, I am asking you to respect my feelings and thoughts. Be safe, good luck, and be healthy!! Louie AKA: Rocky146

This is exactly what I mean, some men are preditors like these 4 you described. Now you pass judgement on all single me as being this way. Not right on both accounts! As the saying goes, "two wrongs do not make a right."

I could see where you felt kind of used in that swing club situation. I would not just go to a swing club though and set and wait for someone to ask me to join in. I would at least introduce myself to the couples and ladies at the club. Let them get to know me, then if they felt comfortable with me, let them make the move to ask me to join in or not. I think that is what you were getting at if I am not mistaking.

There has been some good responses to my post and some not so good. All in all though there has been some good information passed on. It is just so frustrating for a man like me to have judgement passed on me in such a negative way without anyone getting to know me first. I can not tell you how many times I have responded to ads on different sites to get replies, "sorry, no single men" and how low that makes me feel. I am not a predator or an oppertunist. I beleive that "NO" is exactly what it means. I love to make friends first before going to the bedroom. I do not want to just hop into bed with anyone, that is too risky for all parties concerned. To tell you the truth, swing clubs kind of scare me off a bit but not the idea of swining in small groups. It is so hard for me to explain at times but basically all I want is to be judge appropiately by my actions and not someone else's. Of course that has to be very hard to do with ads, swing clubs, etc.. I know that for sure but that does not mean I should not be able to voice my frustration and that is the meaning behind my post.

Yes sometimes I feel just sad that I can not break into the scene. I am not one of those bad boy types that a lot of women goes in for and I would think those type of men would have much better luck then I. I am a man that respects the wishes of others and understand the meaning of "no" but sometimes I just get so disheartened that I have to vent a little.

This type of man makes me mad as hell. You see, I am a single man swinger and this type of man you were talking about gives us single men all a bad name. Sure hope you will not pass judgement on us all single men. We are not all like that, especially me. To me "NO" is what it means and that is to be respected. I have been in a mfm relationship before and it is fun but respect is a total must. You did the right thing and you protected your wife from an oppertunist. He was just using the swinging scene to get a woman, one more mark on his belt of conquest. Good going, good luck!

Here is my rant and it very well may get me kicked out of sls. I think sls discriminates a lot towards single men. I went to fill out a personal ad and they kick back to me that it is required for single men to become paying members within 30 days and that they only allow a few select men into the site. So I went and logged in as a single female, guess what? It did not pertain to them that they had to become a paid member within 30 days and that only a select few single females were allowed in. What is it? Men are not considered swingers if they are not married? I think it is because a lot of these groups that calls themselves swinger groups consider single men predators without even getting to know the man. Men are men if they are married, attached, single, or whatever you want to classify men by. Personalities are different in each and every person rather they are married or what, female or male. I would suggest a name change of the group to something like Couples Only Swing Group. Then there would not be an argument from me here!! Get real people; get to know the people before you discriminate against them!!! I do not go through life intentionally discriminating against others and in turn I do not like to be discriminated against!!! I have read numerous posts on this site already how people flake out on meetings, my answer to them that are complaining about this is no wonder they flake out if they support discrimination, you do not meet their standards!!