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JakenReenie

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About JakenReenie

  • Rank
    Contributor

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    Couple
  • Location
    The frozen wastelands of New Hampshire
  • Interests
    Travel, nudism, golf, gourmet cooking, fine wine, martinis, nude beaches & the obvious.
  • Occupation
    A means to an end

Swinger Info

  • SLS Name
    JakenReenie

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  1. Several years ago, Reenie and I went to Key West for Fantasy Fest. Had a great time all week. We were still feeling pretty horny after a week of debauchery so she decided to give me a nice little blow job while I was driving us back to Ft. Lauderdale. We had rented a huge Lincoln Town Car so it was pretty easy for her to stretch across the seat and really do me right. I had my shorts off and she was naked. This was working very well, it was just past dark and we were on the Inerstate so we felt pretty secure..... so much so that I didn't realize until way too late that we were at a toll booth. My wallet was in my shorts on the floor so I had to scramble around to get it. (Believe it or not, I still had my seatbelt on.) Reenie had thrown her clothes into the back seat. The attendant got quite an eyeful but she never let on. We never finished the job, not so much out of embarrassment, we were just laughing too hard.
  2. I can't believe that nobody has posted before today about last Sunday's episode of the Simpsons. It was their halloween show and they did a parody of the film Mr. & Mrs. Smith. Homer and Marge are contract killers each unknown to the other until they discover that they have been competing with each other. At the end, Marge kills a guy and Homer tells her, "Honey, I just love watching you do a guy." To which Marge responds, " Homee, I'd love to watch you do a guy." Reenie and I laughed our asses off and were pretty thankful there were not children around to hear it.
  3. We don't make too much of age differences. We're both mid 50's and have been playing for 15 years. In that time we've encountered people in their 20s to people in their 60s. Occasionally, Reenie makes noise about some guy being too young but that always seems to be in casual conversation. In the heat of the moment, I've never seen her turn a guy away due to age Sometimes it does seem to be awkward to be playing with somebody younger than our kids but we seem to get over it quickly. I remember somebody (I think in this forum) once said: "If we could have made them, we ain't gonna do them." Noble philosophy but not for us.
  4. One thing Reenie and I have learned over the years: When the warning bells go off and the red flags go up, heed them even if you're not quite sure what they mean. Where there's smoke, there's fire and your brain understands that more quickly on a subconscious level. Every time we have had an uncomfortable feeling about a person or situation, it's turned out to be correcct. I guess you coult call it "creepdar"
  5. On the 15th hole of four different golf courses over a period of a few years. We'll be adding to that total. You haven't lived until you've done it in a moving golf cart on a bumpy fairway.
  6. Almost all of our playing is at home or at someone else's home. We love to entertain, wine and dine our guests, and then we all enjoy the ultimate dessert.
  7. Reenie and I have just one rule: We never, ever, ever, ever fuck on the first date...unless we feel like it.
  8. I've tried all three and, for me, the Levitra is far better than the other two. It produces a stronger erection, better control, and a quicker recovery time than either Viagra or Cialis. Again, this is just my experience. Yours may be different. A quick commentary on their advertising: The Levitra commercials feature a dark haired cutie with incredibly seductive eyes talking about how Levitra makes the experience so much better for her man. Well, I think a come-on from her would make a dead man get an erection. I think a much more effective commercial would feature a Roseanne Barr look alike saying: "If he can get it up for ME with Levitra, you know the stuff works."
  9. Oh, God. At the risk of showing our age, here goes: With the couples we have met over the last few years, sex, performance, sexual prowess, etc. was barely mentioned if at all in correspondence and in the initial meetings. I don't know if that's because we're a couple of old fart New England Yankees meeting similar folks or if it just wasn't that important at the time. With the couples we have met successfully, (that is, something developed), at that first social meeting, we laughed, we discussed past experiences, we laughed, we discussed our lives and jobs, we laughed, we ordered more drinks, we laughed and we decided we were comfortable enough with each other to get together again for some fun. I honestly think that if either partner had bragged about their sexual prowess in that first meeting, Reenie and I would both have been completely turned off. We want to interact with swing partners as people, not just play connect the body parts. And we value friendships more than sex (although sex is right up there too). Maybe that's why we have friends who have dropped out of the lifestyle and still maintained their friendship with us, and in some cases, come back to the lifestyle. And maby that's why we have so many great fucking friends.
  10. Different strokes for different folks - I can guarantee that if we met a couple to scope them out and the male started bragging about his abilities in the sack, the meeting would be over then and there. We value compatibility over sexual prowess.
  11. [quote name= But.. as for the REST of you guys... I must lodge a complaint ...!!!! I know that there have to be more than five stories out there with all the times people write that stuff in their profiles that there must be some interesting things to share... and things we can prepare each other for. Soooooo.... if you can think of anything to post, I would love to read it! OK, OK, don't get your panties all in a bunch, I'm writing as fast as I can. I think that in this case the term games is synonymous with misrepresentation, and we could write a book on people who misrepresent themselves. We have seen: 1. Wankers. Guys who pose as couples just to get off on it. Most of them seem to be picture collectors. We got much more careful about sending pics after somebody sent us OUR OWN PIC claiming it was them! Others go so far as to talk on the phone to set up a meeting, claiming that the wife is in the shower, or just ran out to do an errand or some such foolish thing. We won't converse at all unless both are there, we each converse with both partners and both partners agree to a face to face meeting. 2. Literary Artistes. People who send endless e-mails with ridiculous questions and unreasonable requests before meeting. The worst of these that I recall was a couple who after a long drawn out email exchange decided that they would like to attend a small gathering we were hosting. The day before the event, the husband asked me to send him a list of all of the names and addresses of people who would be attending so they could be sure they wouldn't run into anyone they knew. I responded that I would be happy to comply just as soon as he gave me permission to send their name and address to all of the other people first so I could get their permission. Funny, we never heard from that couple again, although they still remain active on Swappernet. 3. Ageless Beauties. I don't care who you are and what kind of charmed life you've led, a 10 year old picture is not representative of who you are now. Everyone wants to present themselves in the best light, but there is no excuse for being off your description by 10 years, 50 pounds or 6 inches. (We're talking height here, get your minds out of the gutter.) 4. Everybody was a newbie once. This hasn't happened often but we've had couples who have greatly exaggerted their experience only to get completely cold feet once things started getting intimate. We were once playing with a couple and everything was going fine until the woman looked over and saw Reenie riding her husband and started sobbing - talk about a woody killer! That's our idea of gameplaying. I'd like to think we'll never experience it again but I'm not holding my breath.
  12. Jake is 53. Reenie is 58 although we don't act, feel or look our ages. Been together for 16 years, married for one month, (may not see two when Reenie finds out I told her age). Started playing with other couples in '92 and have been loving it ever since. Julie, This would make a great poll question.
  13. OK, Reenie and I claim to be the latest authorities on this subject cuz we just got married last month, after 16 years of being together. It wasn't a swingers' wedding although 3 swinging couples were there, and a new recruit was found ....... and therein lies the tale..... We did a sit down dinner for 50 people in a nicely restored old inn in town here. One of our swinging couples was seated at a table with a single woman who is more of an acquainance than a really close friend and how she even came to be at our wedding is a tale in itself. In any case, she asked Bob how he and his wife knew us. Bob muttered something about meeting though mutual acquaintances years ago. She kind of pressed him on it and eventually he, being under the influence of one too many Manhattans, just blabbed the whole story. Not only was she fascinated with the whole concept, she wants to be invited to our next party. I was horrified when I heard what happened, not only because he told her everything but my sister was sitting at the same table, and I've known since we were kids what big ears she has and what a busybody gossip she is. There's not a doubt in my mind that my entire family now knows of our "other" life. But at 53 years old, I'm really not going to get too excited about it. I'm going to save that excitement for the new addition to our group.
  14. We've never had any bad experiences involving roughness, violence or other physical assaults but we did have two incidents involving theft. Once, at a house party, there was one new couple among 10 couples who have known each other for a few years. We had a little gathering in the living room in the middle of the evening (with most folks in various sates of undress) to celebrate a birthday and we took a few photos. The next day, I discovered all my cash had disappeared from my wallet. (I had left my clothes in one of the bedrooms as always.) Three other guys discovered the same thing. When we looked at the birthday pics later, the female half of the new couple was nowhere to be seen in any of them. Several years later at our own home, we had a small gathering, 4 couples, 2 of whom we had known for years, and a couple we had met twice. The woman knew that Reenie was taking perscription pain pills for a recent surgery and asked for one. Reenie gave one to her from her purse. Next day, all but three of the original 60 pain pills were gone from the bottle. The sneaky little bitch went through her purse some time during the evening. These were not pay at the door parties where anybody with the admission fee gets in; they were private, invite only parties where we thought we knew who we were inviting. That kind of behavior is really depressing and can cause you to lose trust in people. We are now much more cautious in how we deal with new people. It sucks that it has to be that way because this was two scuzzball couples out of several hundred that we've met over the past fifteen years. (Reenie is over my shoulder insisting that I clarify that statement. I didn't mean we have fucked several hundred people over fifteen years. Sorry, Dear, I'm sure it's no more than a few hundred. ) We've met one or two couples who have decided to engage in an argument in our presence but we weren't in bed with them at the time (thank God) and we extricated ourselves from the situation pretty quickly. And in one bizzarre occurrence, we were at a house party where a guy was so jealous and rude that he was bullying and intimidating any guy that talked to his wife, actually positioning himself between her and any guy who came near her. Needless, to say, they didn't stay long and we never heard from them again. I still can't figure out why they were there in the first place. As we think back on it, we've been fairly luck compared to the experiences some folks have had.
  15. There are 6.5 billion people on Earth. There may be even more life forms elsewhere as Earth is just a tiny speck in a universe which may have more stars than there are people on Earth. So, do you really suppose that the Creator of that has time to worry about who you fucked and when? The first commandment: Thou shalt not kill, a reasonable proscription as is Thou shalt not Steal. When we start getting around to coveting and adultery, it gets a bit shaky. Here's how to break 3 commandments in one quick afternoon: You're looking out your window at your neighbor's brand new in-ground pool and you're jealous. Strike One: Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's goods. Your neighbor's gorgeous wife struts out of the house naked to tan by the pool. You get an instant woody at the sight and start drooling thinking about what you'd like to do with her. Strike Two: Thou shalt not covet they neighbor's wife. You decide to stroll over to compliment her on their lovely new pool and her lovely naked body, she offers you a drink, one thing leads to another and next thing you know, you're banging her right there in the chaise lounge. Strike Three: Thou shalt not commit adultery. Go to hell, do not pass Go, do not collect $200. But don't worry about it. All your friends will be there. As Oscar Wilde said: Heaven for the climate; Hell for the company See ya there.
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