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Tnlovers

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  • Content Count

    24
  • Joined

Community Reputation

15 Good

About Tnlovers

  • Rank
    Contributor
  • Birthday 07/29/1970

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    Couple
  • Location
    Tennessee
  • Interests
    flying ultralights, sex
  • Swinging Experience
    very new

Swinger Info

  • SLS Name
    tnlovers
  • Favorite Club(s)
    Pleasure Grove Resort
  1. yes we get out more now. It's much easier to plan things now that the kids are getting older. This thread is somewhere around 3yrs old. It used to be very difficult to arrange things. She has been open to some play and I have had 2 experiences or so one was full swap so she is trying. I just love her more than I love the lifestyle and will not put our relationship in danger so I choose to tread carefully rather than be pushy to play myself. We talked last night and she isn't against it but needs time to ease into it. I understand that. When we first did the mfm. I had a huge range of emotions going on. and horny was at the bottom of the list. When you come from the background we did to just go from that, straight to seeing your spouse get banged requires some adjustment time. Although we have been on this site a while, we started playing in 07 having maybe one encounter every yr to yr and a half so its not like she is getting all kinds of fun and I get nothing. Basically she had 2 mfms then wanted to try letting me play.We had a full swap,then we went to a lifestyle resort where she played once and that is it. So i would still classify us as newbies even though the time period has been quite a while. Hope that helps clear it up a little. tnlovers
  2. I don't think so. We have done a lot of talking over the yrs and she doesn't want to keep playing if it bothers me. She is just not as comfortable as I am about the lifestyle. I love what It does for her libido and It has been my idea from the start. So if anybody has the control it would be me.(although i don't like to think of it like that.) She has stated from the start that I can veto at any time. My personal assessment is that with more exposure to the lifestyle she wil become more comfortable. You have to understand. 6 yrs ago we were both VERY religious and she had never been with anyone but me. She has come a long way from" Halelluyah to Hit it harder harder".
  3. A long overdue update. We have had one full swap since my original post about a year ago. She wasn't crazy about doing it again, I think it is a lack of self confidence or fear of losing me. I am her only real family as her other family members have died so I think she is just afraid of losing me. She said it was ok but a sense of "Protection or Whatever" came out. (she never didn't tell me till we were on our way home or I would have stopped.) So for now we are mainly going to do mfm while keeping an open mind about full swap for me and continuing to expose ourselves to the lifestyle and the people that have made it work successfully.
  4. yes it is mainly due to the kids. We have three children and it is difficult to get a sitter for three. You are right Tybee swing in that is exactly what she said about this trip (o by the way we are going to Destin now) She said she just wanted some one on one time with my undivided attention. Which she definately will get(winK Wink). She is definately trying and I applaude her for that.
  5. Thanks for all of the replies thus far. We are talking about it regularly. She stated she didnt mind something happening just wanted it to happen naturally. She mention maybe a smaller venue than pleasure grove to start with. Desire good to see your on here. You are on my friends list on sls. Thanks for taking the time to reply. Maybe you can help us get a better boaters group started next summer LOL..
  6. I think I recall her mentioning something along those lines briefly a few years back when we first started discussing this. It was another year or so before we actually tried our first MFM. It was mentioned in passing and very brief but that may have been something I should have paid more attention too, She said it almost jokingly and I just chuckled and said yeah right. Guess I should pay more attention to the little things. I am curious how did he relieve your fears. I have expressed my love and attractiveness to her and we have so much history together, Could sure use a woman's point of view
  7. I read over my previous post and feel I may have given the wrong impression or context to the above quote. We rarely are able to get out by ourselves. I mean like once or twice a year. She had stated that she wanted to spend some time as just a couple. Which i think is perfectly reasonable. I think her comment may have had more to do with just wanting some couple time than jealousy about looking. She has never had a problem with me looking as far as I know. ( I have perfected the art of the looking but not being obvious game. I am ok with continuing with MFM It really fires up our sex life for months afterward and is good for her ego. I think after a while in this lifestyle with more exposure she may be more comfortable with who she is
  8. I am happy where we are at but deep down. I guess I feel it shows that she after 16yrs of marriage and 3 kids still is concerned that I am apt to leave at some point. Which is totally untrue. I love her incredibly( although she can drive me nuts at times too LOL) and would never do such a thing. I agree I dont think I would want to be in the playroom with us either right now. I really don't want a fmf although it is a fantasy(Isn't it for every guy.) I just at some point would like to have the option for a soft or full swap to be on the table. And if I were to sychoanalyze myseld it isnt about the swap as much is it is about her ability to trust me not to hurt her. She had an incredibly difficult childhood having pretty much raised herself and I think as stated before that she may have self esteem issues related to that. In fanatsy, the things she is not open to are the very things that drive her the wildest in bed. one of her fav's is imagining placing me inside the other woman as we swap which is pretty hot and bold. I think that given the right opportunity she may be willing to try some of the things. When we started out Mfm she was dead set against it then there was no stopping her. Sorry for rattling on just trying to give as much background as I can so I can get the best advice possible.
  9. to answer spoonmonkey first. it really wasn't part of the original agreement I guess. We talked about it and she said she wouldn't rule it out but at this point she wasn't ready. I told her let's just play the threesome thing out and see where it goes as she gets more comfortable. That was a year ago. What brings this subject up today is that I made a comment last night about going to pleasure grove lifestyle resort in Ga. and she stated that she wanted my full attention not wandering eyes. I think I may try taking taking her someplace vanilla first as we don't get to go out much.
  10. My wife and I have had a few MFM experiences. I would like to attend a swing resort such as hedo or one more locally. I have expressed that I dont feel the need to have sex with another. I however would like the option on the table at some point in the future should we continue with the mfm hotwife scenario. Simply because I had very limited experience when we met and married and I am curious just as she was curious what it would be like to have sex with other men since she was a virgin when we met. I think maybe that she is insecure or has a low self esteem. I don't know why she is 5'10 very long legs and is still hot after 3 kids. She enjoyed our threesome experiences and it made her feel good that she had the undivided attention of 2 men. Which made her feel special. My question is how can I address her jealousy issues in a way that will help her. I would like to eventually try standard swinging. but that is not my main concern at this point. I want her to feel good about herself to a point that she would have no jealousy. I may be totally wrong that jealousy comes from insecurity so any other angles would be appreciated.
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