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J&BinNJ

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  • Content Count

    14
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Community Reputation

15 Good

About J&BinNJ

  • Rank
    Contributor

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    M
  • Location
    NJ
  • Interests
    theater, music, movies, reading, sports entertaining and dining out.
  • Occupation
    he: accountant, she: stay at home mom
  1. Sounds like a couple that contacted us. They had to be discreet and couldonly play in daytime. Once we emailed them and said we may be interested then they told us they were married, just not to each other. Needless to say we then turned them down.
  2. Thanks for all the responses. I would like to try this. I agree it would be a good test to see if I'd be jealous. My only thought would be, if I (or any woman) wasnt jealous with this (lap dances) is that any guaranty that I (or any woman) wouldn't be when you see your mate acutal having sex with another woman? I've never seen a lapdance in person, however from what I understand, the customer is not allowed to touch them is that true? If that is the case, I know I wouldn't be jealous of that, I'd probaly laugh the whole time.
  3. My husband and I are new. We haven't had any experience yet, however, we have been doing a ton of research. This forum has been a wealth of information for us and we thank you all ! As far as discussing boundaries, we have. After 25 years of marriage and being together for 34 years total, we learned to discuss EVERYTHING that we do and discuss it even more when it is something as important as this. Nothing is worth ruining all the years we have together. That said, I wanted to tell you that a couple contacted us last week via an ad we had posted. They seemed very nice and in fact, we had originally thought about contacting them, but they seemed very experienced and doubted they would want to take a step back. We are only looking for same room sex, right now at least and want to go very slow. Before this couple contacted us, we had already made arrangements to meet another couple who were also new and wanted the same thing we did (their profile was almost exactly like ours) so I thanked the other couple and explained our situation. Their reply was to tell us that it may not be a good idea to meet with other newbies because neither of us had experience. I thought that odd because our feeling was that we both knew exactly what we wanted and since neither had experience, we could all be very up front about what we wanted and didn't want, etc. We planned on being honest with this other couple even if it meant we'd never see them again. We met on Saturday and they were very nice, easy to talk to, in fact it was as though we'd known each other for years. They had the same outlook on everything as we did. We both wanted to get to know people before anything could happen-if ever. They felt the same and we had a great time that night, just talking and having some drinks. We will definitely meet with them again and we all agreed we are in no hurry for anything other than friendship right now and if and when it happens, great, if not, we have found new friends ! People we can talk to about this since neither of us can talk to our other friends, they'd have coronaries! So my point from a newbie standpoint is, newbies that are nervous and not ready to do a full swap may be better off with people who are new also that are not ready for full swap or an experienced couple who are willing to start slow (very slow at times) and not push them. I am sure most don't but I am sure some do. Especially once they meet or at least have the first date that isn't a full swap. they will expect the next date to go further. With the four of us, we know it may never go further and we are fine with that. Does this make sense? Anyway, thanks again for all the great info!
  4. LOL! It's taken YEARS to stop thinking like a good catholic couple! We're getting there tho!
  5. This is my first post other than our intro. This my be a stupid question, but here goes. I had seen in other places couples going to strip clubs or being told to try strip clubs when starting out in the lifestyle. Aside from it being erotic, what is the purpose? Or is that the only purpose? Five years ago my husband and I went to New Orleans for our 20th anniversary and went into one of the strip clubs. It was the first time I'd ever been in one soI found it kind of exciting and scary at the same time. My strict catholic upbringing and all ! While we were sitting there having a beer and watching the show, a half naked man came over and asked my husband and I if we wanted to come to the back for a "private" show. Well we said no because we were not sure what he meant by that! Of course we were too shy to ask what he meant by a "private" show. Now, 5 years later we are kicking ourselves for not finding out.
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