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wwjdcb

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wwjdcb last won the day on August 1 2014

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About wwjdcb

  • Rank
    Contributor
  • Birthday 12/01/1974

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    couple
  • Location
    canada
  • Anniversary
    xx/xx/xxxx
  1. Well, put me in the shaved camp. I've been with my wife since we were teens (24 years now). Of course, she never shaved early on and it probably didn't happen till she was in her early 20's. From the first time, i told her there was no going back. I love the way it looks, as in- i can see the damn thing! I also appreciate the smoothness etc. She's kept it shaved ever since (save for those terrible times when she's getting ready for a wax!) I also shave my package and keep anything else trimmed short. We just find it neater and cleaner. To each his own though. We had a FFM where the other women was not shaved, only trimmed. I was actually surprised but it certainly didn't stop either of us from enjoying the experience. However, later while my wife and i were discussing it, i did mention that i didn't care for it as much. I'm really visual.
  2. Thanks for the replies. SW PA couple-your post did help. It is certainly nice to hear positive comments from someone who has gone through the same thing. Obviously in this situation, our minds race to our health first, then our own personal relationship/sex lives and swinging activities are far off in the distance.
  3. Oh, it keeps getting better. Well, after starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel, she felt something in her perianal area. Surprise! Genital warts from HPV! So she now has an incurable STI that is devastating to her. It appears she (we most likely) have been infected with at least 2 different strains of HPV. Whether this is from different times/people is anyone's guess. However, what is clear is the conversations we must now have with the 3 people we have been with. We are both in a mild state of shock. I mean, really, to be together over 20 years, faithfully, then only have sex with 1 couple (a few times) and 1 single woman and end up like this? I fully realize the risks we took-I'm venting of course.
  4. So the results came back as dysplasia (abnormal pre-cancerous cells) brought on by HPV. My wife will have follow up screens every 6 months for the next 18 months. The doc feels it should be cleared by then barring anything unforeseen. We haven't had the talk about our lifestyle future, but i am certain it will not continue. It has been pretty stressful, never mind all the issues with the procedures themselves (she had extended bleeding issues etc) By the time she is healed up, it will be about 8 weeks without intercourse! Of course the future is never clear but I think a healthy extended break would be the minimum for us. Thanks for all the replies on this, it was appreciated.
  5. Thanks for the replies. I'm giving the Dr. a little bit of a pass here. The following is all opinion (ours) and not necessarily facts. She (Dr.) found something abnormal and immediately suspected HPV or another STI as the root cause. She conveyed this, without naming anything, was not the norm in a monogamous relationship and my wife should have a talk with me. My wife was told to await results of the biopsy. Results came back inconclusive so the LEEP procedure was ordered and the Dr., at that time, did not seem as concerned with everything as she was the previous visit. We are now awaiting the results once again from the LEEP. Based on our research, the results could be simply abnormal cells caused by nothing in particular, abnormal cells caused by HPV (very difficult to prove without further testing), pre-cancerous cells caused by HPV, or cancerous cells caused by HPV. At this point, given the first biopsy results, we are not nearly as worried about the last 2 options while the first 2 options remain in play. We are confident in being option 1 or 2. The Dr. was not given any info on our lifestyle and I do not fault her for making the comments she did. Given the info she had, she did her best to protect the health of her patient. Of course we will be taking a lot of time to let this sink in and await the final test results. We never seem to do anything without a lot of discussion beforehand, so this will be no different. I just find it so damn frustrating. We've been together for 25 years. We got to the point where we were really solid with each other and able to share these experiences, albeit in a limited fashion (it is only a 1-3 times a year thing for us), and enjoy it. Now something like this comes along and threatens to wreck it for us. I guess I naively thought because of our very limited exposure, we would never run into issues. Thanks again for the replies, it is nice to hear others thoughts on this. Angelkin - I completely agree with you, as does my wife, but she is unwilling to disclose this info. As I stated, she is also in the medical field and actually working at the same facility as the specialist. I can only accept my wife`s perspective on this issue as she is the one whom works there and is privy to the conversations and gossip that goes on.
  6. Hey all. Hubby here. Recently my wife had her annual check up upon which she was directed to have a follow up concerning cells. During the follow up with the specialist, where she received a colposcopy, she was given a weird vibe when the specialist mentioned she should not "have" whatever is present if she was in a monogamous relationship - read: your husband is likely cheating on you. My wife is quite unwilling to discuss our private lifestyle with any doctor, against my recommendation. As she is also in the field, she feels it will diminish her respect level. Anyways, we felt based on the evidence we had so far, that she had or has HPV which are causing abnormal cells. She had a biopsy which came back inconclusive. She has since gone for another follow up which included a LEEP procedure. We are presently awaiting any results that may follow. While the early results are somewhat reassuring (no cancer, yet), this has obviously struck us hard. We are not active in the lifestyle but certainly enjoy things from time to time. If the cause of the abnormal cells is HPV, we have a very good idea where she (we) got it. We didn't use condoms with the last female partner we were with (our mistake). However, based on all the materials we have read, it is unlikely that condom use would prevent the spread of HPV in this particular scenario (MFF) as oral play and digital play was definitely in the mix and we simply won't take steps to constantly sanitize! This has my wife (and myself to a lesser degree) questioning our choices and our willingness to continue in this type of lifestyle. While our feelings to the act itself haven't changed, neither of us feels it's worth risking hers or our health. Although I can't say I would be happy with giving it up. Just wondering if anyone out there has had any similar experiences or has any thoughts on the subject.
  7. I'm sure everyone who engages in MMF is different and enjoys different aspects. However, a VERY common theme is the enjoyment of seeing their partner enjoying themselves from a different perspective. The voyeuristic aspect to a MMF is fantastic for those that enjoy it. I can't imagine how you would ever get past the way you feel on this. "It's different with men. I can't imagine saying to myself: 'He only gets her for a little while, I have her for life', honestly that's not very comforting. Men are territorial, possessive, collectors. We collect experiences, we possess things."- That may be true of some, not all. I've fucked my buddies wife and he mine and while it was great, i don't feel a possession of anything, save a fantastic memory. "Another thing I'd like to state and I've discussed this with my partner is the fact that when we have a FFM threesome EVERYONE is participating, we are all involved. I touch her, she touches her, we are all kissing, fucking,... with a MMF (normally) the energy flow is very closed off. It doesn't circulate." I've done both (MMF&FFM). I think the flow and circulation is just fine in a MMF. I thoroughly enjoy going from one end of my wife to the other while still seeing my wife enjoy herself or give pleasure to others. There again is what i was saying earlier-enjoying seeing my wife give and receive pleasure from others. I am 100% hetero and have 0 desire for any male/male contact. If i had to choose 1 threesome over the other, it would be MMF. I just enjoy the voyeuristic aspect and the endless possibilities another dick adds. I could never appreciate seeing my wife with someone i disliked or I didn't feel comfortable with but if it's someone we both approve of it can be great. Until you can feel similarly, i would suggest refraining from such activities. You won't enjoy them and it will create problems in your relationship. Remember, you don't have to change-it's not wrong to feel the way you do. Everyone is different and perfectly entitled to their own feelings and boundaries in this particular lifestyle.
  8. Thanks for the info. BTW, we are all instructed at birth to be nice, polite Canadians!
  9. Hey all. My wife and I along with another couple are planning a winter getaway. We are not active swingers but are planning to go to an adults-only resort somewhere. Neither couple is upset with nudity/swinging/whatever. While we do not plan on swinging,we're looking for a good time without kids. I'm looking for feedback on some resorts others have been to within the last few years. We are all right around 40 and are not interested in being the old people at a hard body 25 year old party etc. Nor do we want to be the odd people out because we are not partaking in swinging etc. Any suggestions?
  10. To expand further-No, we have never been with her before, we've spent a little time with her socially but that's it. There was some light discussion of the lifestyle earlier before she left. Basically, she had heard a few rumors which were actually untrue. Although, we were up front about our past experiences. However, there was no discussion about the three of us. My wife mentioned that twice before-many years ago, there seemed to be some sort of interest there, between those two. Regarding the "intruder" issue-We live in very small town in Canada, we are not really concerned with intruders-especially those with enough courtesy to knock on our bedroom door! It really is a different mind set up here, more so where we live.
  11. We are not active members in the lifestyle. However, we have had a number of full swap situations with friends of ours along with 2 MFM's with the male half of said couple. Lately, we had our first MFF. If you had asked me before to choose only one situation, i would go with the MFM. Pleasing my wife and being able to watch her enjoy herself is always my biggest thrill so the MFM is perfect for that. Like real life porn. However, after last weekend, when my wife asked me "So, choose-MFM or MFF?" I didn't know what to say. I always thought that i would be the "star" in a MFF and this didn't interest me as much. I was wrong. My wife was still the star and i enjoyed every minute of it! It is always nice to enjoy another lady as well. The best part was how the whole situation happened. We had a party and an old acquaintance unexpectedly showed up whom we haven't seen for a number of years. While she wasn't invited, we were more than happy to see her and catch up. The evening wore on and everyone eventually went home, including her. My wife and i retired to the bedroom and were having our own fun when i heard a soft knock on our bedroom door! My wife was somewhat put off as she was close to climax. I was stunned as i never heard anyone come into the house. I walked to the door naked to see what was up and was pleasantly surprised to see our old friend there. It was a matter of seconds before she was naked and the girls were playing and a great time ensued. We had so much fun we had a repeat performance the next night! It was a perfect situation and result for a new experience.
  12. I would estimate that from 17-32, i stayed hard at least 95% of the time and i had 2 orgasms per session. I'm almost 40 and i find i only stay hard about 75-80% of the time now, but still have 2 orgasms most of those times. On a good night, i'll stay hard the entire time having 3 orgasms over the course of 1.5-2 hrs. Not too often though, the wife is usually done after an hour or so.
  13. Talk to your wife first about the possibility of swinging. It really begins there. Be careful, a sexually charged kiss could be just that-a kiss. Something that isn't supposed to grow into something more. If both you and your wife are on the same page, you need to discuss it with the other couple. A real, sober, discussion.
  14. While we are not swingers, we have played on a number of occasions with 2 different couples. EVERY time we had consumed alcohol (all involved). My wife is simply more laid back when she has had a few. Now, none of us was blackout drunk or sick but probably over the legal threshold to drive. My wife nor anyone else involved has ever mentioned any regret other than "we have to do that sober, so we can be more focused". Inevitably, it doesn't happen again until the right circumstances line up and that usually involves a night out with alcohol involved. We have never planned. Taking the hard line in this area is really the safest route. You won't be at risk if you never involve yourself with someone who has consumed alcohol or drugs. Likewise, don't use if you plan on playing. That's the easy answer, although it is not the way we conduct ourselves. We don't get involved with strangers so i have no personal experience. To be perfectly honest though, if we were at a club and were getting hit on by a couple we found attractive that were drinking, we would do it. Now i'm not talking ridiculous drunk but not necessarily sober either. I have no interest in taking advantage of drunk women. I passed that up many times when i was young. But i would play with someone who was buzzed. I respect everyones opinion in this matter. There is no definitive right answer for everyone-just what your able to accept as far as consequences go.
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