Jump to content

SAVANDWIN

Registered
  • Content Count

    101
  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won

    5

SAVANDWIN last won the day on August 30 2011

SAVANDWIN had the most liked content!

Community Reputation

266 Excellent

About SAVANDWIN

  • Rank
    100 Posts Club
  • Birthday 11/28/1961

Personal Info

  • Relationship Status
    Couple
  • Location
    Alabama

Swinger Info

  • SLS Name
    SAVANDWIN

Recent Profile Visitors

The recent visitors block is disabled and is not being shown to other users.

  1. "Yes, some swinging couples do have a double standard. Why? They're willing to compromise their ethics to get what they want.: I agree , sadly, there is a definite double standard especially if it is a women playing as a unicorn. Some people are so desperate to fulfill their fantasies by adding a 2nd women to the bedroom activities they lose all moral fiber or convince themselves it is none of their business. To each their own but WE"D SHUN you both no IF'S, AND'S, or BUT'S about it. Swinging is about open honest communication between couple. You by definition are a cheater and so is she. You portrayed yourselves as a "couple" thereby lying to others and potentially dragging them into your drama. Just because you hook up with someone for the purpose of swinging does NOT make you a couple by any stretch of the imagination. My condolences to your wife she deserves better than you. Mrs Sav
  2. I do understand what is being said about your own fears and insecurities. But the fact remains you freely gave yourself to another and enjoyed yourself and now are concerned that your wife might enjoy the same. Perhaps those fears should have been considered before you decided to have sex with another. Since you either didn't think of them or decided to ignore that aspect I am merely suggestion you give a long hard look at yourself and your relationship, including "trust" .Swinging isn't for everyone and that's fine but to be ok with you indulging in your fantasies and your wife not being allowed to based on your insecurities isn't the best situation and very potentially can cause feelings of resentment. Something to think about. Mrs Sav
  3. I have a hard time with men who have enjoyed the company of another women but aren't comfortable with a wife enjoying another man. It just doesn't make sense to me and sounds terribly selfish. You say your wife trusts YOU and her BEST FRIEND to not develop feelings and you can't or won't give her the same respect? If a man doesn't respect me enough to give me his complete trust I don't afford him my trust. What's good for one partner has to be equally good for the other for this to work. Although everyone can have moments of jealousy, fear or insecurity unless you can get over yours only problems lie ahead. What you're saying is that YOU have more self control, you are capable of handling sex with others, enjoying it without affection or comparison to your spouse while she is not. Good luck and I hope you think long and hard about the double standard. Mrs Sav
  4. Hi, I never travel your direction, but have a number of girlfriends in AZ. We are on on the SLS website with pics, if your care to travel, we have some great girl get togethers. Some are Bi, some are Les.

  5. I wish you all the luck truly but I would caution you to understand that if you are in a swinger party environment many if not most will assume you are bi sexual. Not a big deal but you must be prepared to get hit on by men, your partner to get hit on by men and be able to handle that and defuse the situation politely , respectfully and without any drama. It is not uncommon for "some" men to be too touchy-feely as well with any women they see, inappropriate yes but also a fact of party life. Most people once they understand your situation will politely apologize and move on . I am not suggesting you avoid these types of get-togethers but just be prepared and comfortable enough to handle situations like that. Keep in mind that all women face these situations no matter their sexual orientation but the chances are multiplied in a swinger environment. May all your fantasies come true.
  6. First let me state that We are not insecure, we do not suffer from jealousy and aren't afraid of separating based on the issue of safety. We only swing together and only in the same room because We enjoy watching each other give and receive pleasure. We enjoy being with couples who share an incredible desire and attraction for their own partners and interact with them as well as with us during any play session. In a technical sense we don't do threesomes (never bring in just a 3rd) but many times during play it is MMF or FFM as one of us will sit back and watch for awhile. We see this as the best of all arrangements for us. Separate room play or separate dating has zero appeal for us. Unlike many we really have been very successful of finding like minded couples where the 4 of us shared sexual attraction. We've yet to have a "bad" experience in almost 5 years of active swinging. We make no judgments about other peoples play style or preferences but it isn't a place we are ever going. Mrs Sav
  7. Although I appreciate a man who finds his pregnant wife sexy and agree that some men might find someone else pregnant wife sexy we aren't going there. We were recently contacted by a couple and when we viewed their photos they had at least 6 supposedly "sexy Photos" of them together naked. This women had to be at least 8 months pregnant for us it was an instant turn off. The body of a pregnant women is a beautiful miracle but in no way does it arouse the slightest sexual interest for us, in fact has the complete opposite effect. I also agree that even the slightest risk of a sexually transmitted disease should be a weighed heavily when considering if swinging is a good idea.
  8. Getting hung up on "LABELS" in the lifestyle leads to misconception. There isn;t a class for " I love men but adore women occasionally" I'm voting for a category called Bi Playful....I like women BUT and thats a HUGE BUT I never consider the possibilities between her and I before we play. I do not seek out Bi or straight couples. I seek couples that appear to be a good match between us. I don't walk down the street and ever think "boy I'd like to do her" I never size a women up based on what I PREFER in a women and frankly don't give a rats ass if she an I ever interact sexually. That being said Mr Sav couldn't careless if I am Bi ,Bi friendly, Bi Playful or completely straight. His fantasy date doesn't necessarily include us girls going to town. As a matter of fact we NEVER seek or play with couples who state that as their primary interest.Labels are foolish and misleading but on sites such as this you pick a "label" deemed on what SEEMS appropriate. It's been said if you won't go down on a women you're still curious, if you've had more than one encounter your Bi, if you prefer men and women equally your Bi, if you and your partner only allow girl girl shes isn't Bi shes a lesbian ......seriously a confusing mess until you talk to each person as an individual. I've read so many "rules" on this terminology and frankly I am still confused. I am not longer curious...I enjoy playing with women occasionally But could not and would not ever consider a relationship with a female, would not and have no interest in strictly girl girl play and I do not share equal preference for women and men.......I LOVE men, the shape, feel and smell of them. I adore women and when the mood is right thoroughly enjoy all aspects of our play but still require, want and need a man. I've flipflopped between my status as Bi and Bi curious never quite sure what Label is appropriate. It is all based on the interrupter and without reading our profile the reader is left clueless and sometimes scared"Oh my god shes Bi and will attack me". My suggestion to those STRAIGHT people is to thoroughly read profiles, looks at photos provided, look for clues that this couples promary interest is girl/girl and ask questions of people you might be interested and IGNORE the label provided. You'd be pleasantly surprised to learn that 70 % of our play with other couples involved no girl /girl for many reasons but all our experiences have left us and them happy ( we assume) One of my sons is GAY, he's had sex with women so should if he was on this site should he be listed as Bi ....hell no he's gay pure and simple. My point is that people need to be very careful about labeling others, until you ask questions you will never know their true status or the reason behind the posted status. Worse than the difficulties I struggle with is the whole aspect of men and their status. What a stigma they carry for being so bold as to list Bi or curious. Mr Sav is straight no shadow of a doubt and no curiosities but as the mother of a gay son I completely sympathize with the labeling , judging and discomfort of other people. What I do know is that sexuality isn't contagious, people aren't going to force their preference on you if you're straight and noone is going to make you play bi if your preference is otherwise....as a matter of fact if your profile is clearly written the subject won't even come up. Frankly for anyone one of you who claims your wife is 100% straight but doesn't mind what a women DOES TO HER I'd re-evalutate that label. A 100% straight women isn't 100% sraight if she willing takes sexual pleasure from a woman but refuses to give in return that label is" selfish "!!!!!. For instance if you as the male had no issues with some guy fondling you and sucking your cock who you still consider that "straight behavior" just because you chose to not return the pleasure????? Don't think so. If you part take in 3somes with a 3rd male partner and have ANY contact without pause or concern how do you label that without others thinking your gay? My godness your penises were touching !!!! I read a post on another sight on 3 way postions and one gentleman posted he loved to go down on his wife while another was having sex with her......yup you got it ...backlash that he MUST be gay because some other mans Balls might be brushing his forehead at the same time. We define ourselves how we are comfortable letting see us when in fact they are grey areas we ourselves can not define. Labels are deceiving and although we all (lets hope) try to post with honesty our actions are misinterupted by many. Just some food for thought. Until we have more options to "define " ourselves publicly on our profiles to others I'll be flipflopping my status between BI and Bi curious and will continue to hope they're provide a label called Bi Playful. I am Bi Playful, I adore woman occasionally but will always want and desire a man. I can do wothout a womens touch but never without a mans. Mrs Sav
  9. The odds are that we get about 89% of emails from single males with a single "hook up" type line. I am not flattered to be part of you mass form letter email and generic info you've just sent to 200 others. On the flip side Mr Sav and I met online on a vanilla dating site and do you know that bastard sent me a "mass form letter" the difference was that this time I had reached the breaking point and gave him a come to Jesus meeting for having the nerve to waste my time filling my email box with his copied and pasted crap!!! Lo and Behold no one had ever called him out on it and well lets say the rest is history. We've been together for more than 4 years and stronger than ever. That being said I'm not making exceptions again...you send me a crass email or a damn form letter I'm done long before you've had a chance to begin. Is it a lot of work to get to actually meet someone yes but am I worth the effort Hell Yes . That being said if what you're doing works for you have at it but if it isn't remember this "If you always do what you've always done you'll always get what you've always got" ....in this case IGNORED. Mrs Sav
  10. Gordo, A sorry followed by the word BUT isn't an apology at all. You're entitled to your opinion but I wonder what makes you an expert on deciding who should swing or not based on the limited information provided in a forum seeking help. Everyone makes mistakes every single day but hopeful we learn and grow from them and move forward to become better people. Surely you yourself have made many mistakes in your life . If you made a mistake on your first day on the job should you be immediately fired and made to find a different career? If you upset your wife should she divorce you? Contributing something helpful is one thing to act all knowing is quite another. Perhaps swinging isn't for them but that's not really for you to decide nor judge based on a single episode. Mrs Sav
  11. Welcome to the classroom of swinging. Trust me no matter how much you talk with your partner or playmates new potentially problematic instances arise all the time. Until we are confronted with a situation ourselves we can't be sure how we will feel or how we might react. Swinging is a continual growth process, it takes a lot of communication both listening and hearing. So your first experience didn't go the way you had hoped but you learned something, chalk it up as experience. Next time use caution on the amount of alcohol being consumed , when we mix alcohol with unfamiliar territory someone is bound to stumble. Secondly might I suggest you seek out a true couple not just a partner for you both individually. Play on the same bed as your partner and be an active participant in their fun as well as your own. Next time one of you finishes before the other engage in their fun, make eye contact with your partner , lean over and whisper how hot you find it watching them, encourage them , tell them you love them and touch them the way you know they like to be touched........just get involved. When people enter into the lifestyle they have all these ideals in their head to fulfill but the reality is it is filled with potential pitfalls and no matter how much you communicate issues are going to arise. It is how you settle them that will make the difference. You learned 2 very valuable lessons already ;alcohol is best used in moderation when swinging and leaving ones partner is never a good idea. I am sure your husband learned his own lessons including that when one partner wants to go the party is over.........no discussion! You have many more lessons to be taught and each is individual to the couple, there really isn't a how to book , there are only suggestions of what works for others. When emotions are involved no text book has a sure fire plan for successful swinging. Know yourself, understand your partner and set limits that work for the both of you. Most importantly be ready to forgive each other when things go less than ideal. As for the forums you'll get a lot of good advice and many idiots who are just rude and mean...take it all with a grain of salt. Filter out what helps you and ignore the rest. Good Luck to you both.
  12. The disposable pads from Wally World are super absorbent, we have never had break through leakage and trust me I am / can be a super SQUIRTER. As I mentioned using 2 pads helps but it is more of a "which side of the bed will be on " thing. Leather couch or not I'd still be covering it......YUCK ! I do not want to have to clean any surfaces when the fun is over. It may not leave a stain but surely does/will leave a mess....but perhaps I am just a clean/neat freak. I see no point in investing "lots" of money on something I am merely going to throw away and has given us complete satisfaction for many years. A single sheet I do not mind tossing in the laundry but for a long time it involved 2 if not 3 loads of laundry to clean up afterwards. We use them at home, at hotels and most definitely at anyone else's home.
  13. We use the under pads from Wally World as well. But we use 2 pads to cover both sides of the bed and always cover the pads up with a sheet...the sheet is softer, keeps the pads in place and helps eliminate the plastic crinkle noise. We NEVER leave home at without at least 4 as well as 2 twin sized sheets specifically bought for that purpose , No one wants a wet bed, pool table or carpet...especially me the Squirter! They do come in a 30x36 which will give you good coverage on a king-sized bed. Less than 8.00 for a 12 pack
  14. I hear ya lol....................some things are best reserved for your spouse ! She loves and knows you well enough to overlook certain behaviors lol. If I get to know you so well I leanr things about you I NEVER wanted to know I'll be singing..........there's goes another perfectly good fantasy shot right to hell. Mrs Sav
  15. I wonder what happens when one of the 2 swapped couples becomes disenchanted with the other spouse. For me personally sometimes the more I get to know someone the less I like them. There are things I prefer you reserve for your own wife! I do not want to wake up beside you, I don't need to be involved in your day to day lives, hear about your office gossip/problems, your health issues, financial difficulties or for that matter what your wife did last week that pissed you off. We adore all our "friends" but we do not want to "date" any of them nor get toooo personal. Ya can only talk about sex for so long lol. The more you hang out with people the more flaws are exposed, yours and mine. Mr. Sav loves me unconditionally as I do him but I do not want to know "you" so well that I have to overlook your flaws while swinging. The only exclusive emotional attachment I want or need is with Mr. Sav. Sounds like a Hot Mess. We've never encountered it and frankly if we did we'd be extremely uncomfortable. But alas to each their own . Mrs Sav
×
×
  • Create New...