jassummer

Just to clarify... I ment the three of us. Her, her bf and me. Sent from my HTC One S

I'm not much for long winded stories but here we go. For several months the wife and I have been dating. We negotiated aside trends for an open marriage and we have both enjoyed and benefited from our efforts. We've learned the difference between envy and jealousy and how to deal with negative emotions in a VERY adult way. What we've dealt with up till now has mostly been closer to the poly side of things as we try invest a degree of emotions in our outside relationships, and this works for us. Last week we went to an awesome club, meet some great people and fulfilled a few fantasies. Although everything with other people was quite soft. We did put on quite the show for others in the group room and even received a few cheers from an activity observing crowd. Last night we ventured into something a little wild for a first swapping experience. We met with a man, had a few drinks then things got a little hot. He was bi and we took advantage of that fact (I was curious). Last night we learned a few things. I learned that what I thought was attraction to males is really just appreciation fir their physique. At no point did I do anything that made me uncomfortable, in fact I rather enjoyed myself. I learned I give great blowies and that a man's cock feels very nice, but that men and playing with men doesn't do anything for me sexually. My wife and I decided to call my sexual preference cock-friendly-straight. I would definitely play soft again with another man in the heat of the moment, but I'm not seeking this anymore. We also learned that seeing each other with someone else is a great turn on. I watched my wife do another man and kiss and it felt great. I worried that negative emotions might surface, but none did. I think previous experiences, from our open marriage, with negative emotions and working through them as a couple has made it very easy and intuitive to be with other partners in a swing situation. So.... We had a blast, but no more bi-mmf play. It isn't for us. HOWEVER, I can't wait to hook up with my wife's bf for some good times. He is experienced in the ls, that really makes me comfortable with him. All three of us are sexually aggressive. I think this might be the making of our next adventure. Until later, J & S Sent from my HTC One S

So I just posted the rules of our open marriage (The Terms of Relationship), but then realized that they don't mean much to playing, so the Mrs. and I decided to write down our play rules do we had a go-to list.... Play Rules 1. No means no. 2. No partner in a committed, monogamous relationship can be considered for play. 3. Respect your playmate's rules. If a conflict exist follow the most conservative rule. 4. Ask permission in group settings. "May I?" 5. Condoms are mandatory for vaginal and anal intercourse. 6. Any partner has an unconditional right to stop playtime for any reason. 7. No rules may be negotiated after playtime starts. 8. If at anytime an emotional bond develops all parties must be informed and consenting. If this condition is met then The Terms of Relationship becomes effective. If this condition is not met then the relationship must be severed.

We have a predominantly poly set of rules in which an emotional relationship is the expected norm. Having stated that, the rules mostly apply to our swinging experience also. We call it our terms of relationship. The unspoken rules are: Come home to each other, and we reserve the right to put our foot down for any reason at any time. Terms of Relationship 1. The goal is to experience compersion for each other and to further develop our own personalities while maintaining multiple emotionally and physically significant relationships. 2. Jealousy and envy are issues that will occasionally need to be dealt with. Honest two-way communication, compassion and compromise should be the emotional tools used for dealing with these negative feelings. 3. Other partners are not allowed into the home until a mutual agreement and acceptance is reached between all parties. 4. We will openly inform each other about advances and setbacks in our relationships. 5. Physical expression is a natural part of any romantic relationship. It should develop at a normal and respectful pace. 6. The first sexual encounters should not happen too early. And should be discussed prior to fulfillment. If the first sexual encounter is spontaneous then we will discuss it with each other within forty-eight hours. 7. Absolutely, under no circumstance is fluid bonding or barrier-free sex allowed with other partners. 8. Short-term relationships will be any relationship lasting less than three months. 9. Long-term relationships will inevitably develop out of healthy and honest short-term relationships. They will be defined by a significant commitment between all parties and may require a renegotiation of the terms-of-relationship. 10. Persistent-long-term relationships may develop to the point that we wish to include the partner in our primary relationship. This decision is akin to marriage and all parties must be equally enthusiastic and share a commitment to the primary family goals.