Spotlight Interview #39 - RippleCpl

[JustAskJulie]

About the interviews

Swingers Board interviews are a way for us to get to know each other better. It is a way to acknowledge just how wonderfully varied a community we are.
Every Thursday, a new interview will start and the old interview will be locked.

Every SwingersBoard member is allowed to ask the amount of questions specified by the interviewee in the answers to the default questions. If they discover that they chose too high or low a limit, they may change their choice.

Try to keep this thread about the person being interviewed. If you want to comment about things you discover you have in common or just elaborate on a response, pm them and make a new friend or start a new thread about it. This is intended to be a friendly thread, so please don’t ask anything in a purposeful attempt to get a heated debate. Of course, nobody is required to answer a question that they do not want to.

The current person being interviewed will choose the next person. It is preferred that you pick someone that you do not know very well as the purpose of this thread is to get to know new people. If for some reason, the next interviewee has not been chosen in time for the new interview, I will pick the next person. If you would like to be added to my list of back-up interviewees, please pm me.

Also, please keep in mind that any answers you post are viewable to complete strangers. There is some risk in that. Again, all questions are optional.

The following are general questions asked at the start of each new interview.

Question limit (as the interviewee you may limit the questions on a per post or per user basis if you wish):
Gender (if not a couple):
If a couple, which one primarily posts:
Age(s):
Birthday(s):
Location:
Relationship status:
Swinging for how long?:
Prefer to swing with:
Favorite food(s):
Biggest Pet Peeve:
Brief Intro:
Picture:
Website (your own or one of your favorites):

[RippleCpl]

Question limit: 293
Gender (if not a couple): M/F couple
If a couple, which one primarily posts: Mr. RippleCpl
Age(s): Mr. 36 / Mrs. 30
Birthday(s): November / April
Location: Indianapolis, IN
Relationship status: Together 7 years, married 1.5 years
Swinging for how long?: 2 months
Prefer to swing with: Married couples
Favorite food(s): Chicken Tikka Masala / Ribs
Biggest Pet Peeve: People who take two parking spaces to protect their stupid cars.

Brief Intro:
In many ways we are average married folk, but in many other ways, we aren't. First off, we are a bi-racial couple; I'm caucasian and she is asian. Though we've both lived in America most of our lives, a lot of times the cultural differences between us are readily apparent. She is very practical and driven to succeed, while I am more impulsive and idealistic. Luckily, most of the time it works, in a complementary sort of way.

We currently do not have any children, though we do have a lot of pets (two dogs and 4 cats.) She is a Project Manager for a large corporation, and I work as a freelance video editor/multimedia producer. My ultimate goal is to make a movie. What her ultimate goal is, even she doesn't know.

We are very open-minded and adventurous, but also somewhat reserved and quiet. We don't smoke, drink, or do drugs (anymore). Trying to dance sober is a painful experience for us, and for anyone watching. When we are not working or surfing the internet, we are either watching some pretentious art film or eating at some hole-in-the-wall ethnic restaurant. We're both trying to get in better shape, and this May will run the Indianapolis Mini-Marathon (her first, my second).

That's it.

Picture: You can see some pictures of us on AFF (indyripplecpl is our handle)
Website (your own or one of your favorites): Aside from Swingers Board, this is my favorite site.

[northindycpl]

LOL Ribs!

So what brought you two into swinging? How has it been for you so far?

[JustAskJulie]

What kind of movie do you want to make?

[RippleCpl]

Originally Posted by northindycpl

So what brought you two into swinging? How has it been for you so far?

I (Mr. RippleCpl) started the whole thing. Before I met the Mrs., I had decided that swinging was for me. Prior relationships of mine had fallen apart, and the biggest factor (in my mind) was my desire to be with other women. I had always been in long term relationships and had never really gotten a chance to "sow my wild oats". So as soon as the Mrs. and I started dating, I mentioned swinging to her. She did the diplomatic thing and said "That's not something I can see myself doing right now." Well, being a sexual optimist, I took that to mean that in the future it may be a possibility. I casually brought it up again every once in a while, but after seven years, she still didn't seem interested, and we never really discussed it deeply.

So one day, I decided to get serious. We had a big discussion about our relationship and our sex life. Too make a long story short, she didn't agree to swing, but instead, agreed to let me pursue other women. Two days later, however, she watched the famous Oprah episode on swingers. She was struck by how normal the swingers seemed, and decided that she would give it a go.

And here we are, about two months later. Things have gone surprisingly well( I keep waiting for a problem to crop up so I have something to post about here on Swingers Board. ) It's been a total adventure, with even the not-so-fun times becoming hugely valuable learning experiences. Every new interaction, whether online or at a club requires us to get together and work out a strategy. It's kind of like playing chess.

[RippleCpl]

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

What kind of movie do you want to make?

It's hard to say. Basically, I'm just trying to come up with a good idea, and whether that idea will be a documentary, a black comedy or a sci-fi film, I cannot say. The first one I feel really comfortable with, I'll pursue. And hopefully, it will make people think and feel. I'm not a fan of the "Turn off your brain and relax" type of movie.

Here are some of my favorite movies (in no particular order):

eXistenz
Spider
The Rapture
Welcome to the Dollhouse
American Beauty
The End of the Affair
Chuck and Buck
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Together

[ALilOEverything]

How did you meet and fall in love?

Where all have you lived?

[Vespertine]

Originally Posted by RippleCpl

I'm not a fan of the "Turn off your brain and relax" type of movie.

Here are some of my favorite movies (in no particular order):

eXistenz
Spider
The Rapture
Welcome to the Dollhouse
American Beauty
The End of the Affair
Chuck and Buck
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Together

Wow! You have great tastes in movies!

Chuck and Buck has to be one of my favorite all time movies. I must have watched it a hundred and one times.

I like movies that make me think too. External Sunshine is definitely one of those movies. I was impressed at Jim Carrey's performance. It was refreshing to see him embracing a different type of role.

Questions...

How is your wife adapting to the lifestyle? Has she had any experiences yet?

Are you guys doing this as a couple or are you exploring solo options as well?

[LikeMinds321]

Originally Posted by RippleCpl

Luckily, most of the time it works, in a complementary sort of way.

First, I must say how impressed I am that you spelled 'complementary' correctly in this sentence. Rarely do I see people use the word properly.

American Beauty is one of my favorite movies as well.

1) Have you two worked out some communication code when meeting swingers at the clubs? Like when you aren't keen on someone who has approached you, you can't say it outright, so you have something one of you says to the other to convey what you are thinking?

2) Do you anticipate meeting more swingers through clubs or ads?

3) What type of swinging experiences are you seeking?

LM

[JustAskJulie]

How did your first swinging experience go?

Does she read the board with you?

[RippleCpl]

Originally Posted by ALilOEverything

How did you meet and fall in love?

We met at work. I (Mr.) would walk over to her department all the time to visit, and we started to eat lunch together. Soon after, she began to see me as dating material; not for her, but her friend. The three of us (me, her, her friend) went to a party, but I spent the whole time talking to her, and not to her friend. We started spending a lot of time together, but when I asked her if we were dating, she said "No, we're just friends." I didn't believe her, and it turned out I was right. She liked me a lot, but was afraid of what her family might think (I wasn't an engineer or a cardiologist.) We decided to go for it anyway, and somehow fell in love (though we are definitely not the kissy-kissy, baby-talking, "I wuv you!" type of couple.)

Originally Posted by ALilOEverything

Where all have you lived?

Mr: Indiana, Ohio, Arizona
Mrs: A secret location in Asia, Missouri, Indiana

[RippleCpl]

Originally Posted by LikeMinds321

First, I must say how impressed I am that you spelled 'complementary' correctly in this sentence. Rarely do I see people use the word properly.

Thank you, though it won't be long until you see me use "your" instead or "you're."

Originally Posted by LikeMinds321

1) Have you two worked out some communication code when meeting swingers at the clubs? Like when you aren't keen on someone who has approached you, you can't say it outright, so you have something one of you says to the other to convey what you are thinking?

Yes we have. A thumb squeeze means "Go for it." A pinky squeeze means "No way!" A squeeze on any other finger means "Keep going, I haven't decided yet." It worked quite well on NYE, but it took her a moment to realize I was signalling her.

Originally Posted by LikeMinds321

2) Do you anticipate meeting more swingers through clubs or ads?

Definitely clubs. Face-to-face meetings are where it's at. It's so easy to misread someone in an ad or an email or a chat. Plus, with clubs, you're all already there, you don't need to schedule anything.

3) What type of swinging experiences are you seeking?

Well, I think we are at the point where we would like to try a full swap with another couple. She had her first girl-girl experience on NYE, and I think she would like to pursue that more, but kind of as an appetizer and not the main course. I'd also like to have people we've met over to our house, so we didn't have to spend so much time away from our dogs.

[RippleCpl]

Originally Posted by Vespertine

How is your wife adapting to the lifestyle? Has she had any experiences yet?

Mrs. RippleCpl here. I think I've adapted to the lifestyle quite well, though I've noticed a few side effects from swinging.

1. INCREASED LIBIDO - I think about sex more than ever, constantly checking people out and depositing them in my memory bank for future fantasies. I've also found sex much more fun--with other couples and especially with Mr. Ripple alone.

2. IMPROVED SELF-IMAGE - I don't have a perfect body (rubenesque) and have always yearned for the Jennifer Aniston physique. Since we started visiting clubs, I've gotten many nice complements from people, which have certainly helped my self-image. I'm embarrassed to say that I'm starting to check out my hot bod when I walk by a mirror naked.

3. IMPROVED PHYSICAL APPEARENCE - Before entering the lifestyle, I didn't put much effort into my appearance. I rarely wore makeup, half-heartedly styled my hair, and wore conservative clothes that covered every inch of my body. Now one of my favorite pastimes is shopping for sexy outfits with Mr. Ripple. I wear makeup and perfume at least 5 days a week, and my hair always looks great!

4. BETTER COMMUNICATION - We now talk about our fantasies with each other, which we rarely did before.

5. I'M AN ALL AROUND HAPPIER PERSON because I am having fun.

Originally Posted by Vespertine

Are you guys doing this as a couple or are you exploring solo options as well?

All of our experiences so far have been as a couple. If I am having a good time, I want to make sure Mr. Ripple has a good time too (and vice versa). It's also a huge turn on to see someone else pleasing him.

Currently, we are not exploring solo options, though we have discussed it. I will consider a solo experience only if I know that he has someone else to play with.

[RippleCpl]

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

How did your first swinging experience go?

It depends on what we consider our first swinging experience. I (Mr.) kind of think our first experience was cam2cam cybersex with a couple in Florida. That went really well. The couple seemed nice, and I couldn't believe how comfortable my wife was with the whole situation. Along with Oprah's show, I believe that experience finally convinced her that swingers weren't all crazy perverts.

Our first club experience was also similarly satisfying. We only played with each other, but we met a lot of really nice people, and that left us both feeling really comfortable. The next time we where there, we met some of the same people, and they introduced us to other people that we ended up playing with. I've always hated "Networking" in the vanilla world, but when it comes to clubs, it's a must.

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

Does she read the board with you?

She's read the board a few times, but I think doing this interview will get her more interested (she's answering a question right now.) She's not much of an internet person. If she could go out to lunch with a bunch of women and talk about swinging with them, I think she would be in heaven.

[NotsoNew]

Hello -

Since you both don't drink, have you found it interesting in the club experiences you have had? When we go to clubs, we find that most people are drinking to some degree.

When you two decided to swing (not on cam), and met that couple at the club, did you already decide to play if you had the opportunity or did you need to regroup before you played?