Good ice breaker or opener to sex..

Tojo99 · 05-13-2006, 12:15 AM

My wife and I have had one awesome experience and are ready to try again (with the same guy.)
The first time she was VERY nervious and unsure how to start so after we met for dinner we came up with the idea of having her blindfolded and ready in bed when he came in.
That way she was unsure of who was doing what, and didn't have to go through the ackwardness of undressing in front of him.

This time we will skip the blindfold but are still unsure of a good way to start. I also need to mention that kissing the other guy on the mouth is out.

Without the kissing, we don't know really how to get the ball rolling once he comes in the room.

Once everyone's undressed and in bed there's no problem, we would just like a good 'opening' strategy.

Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

makingtime4fun · 05-13-2006, 02:54 AM

I know for me it was awkward to undress myself in front of other people. My former boyfriend did find one way to break the ice for all of us and that was to have them undress me. It was a good way to start foreplay and it helped to slow it down enough that you had time to move past the awkward moments before the sex starts. They usually spent about 10 minutes undressing me and then I would spend about 10 minutes undressing them. We had a lot of foreplay during those 20 minutes and all nerves were gone after about the first 30 seconds. I think it was better because the sex started while we were still dressed and that made it more sensual instead of just plain sex.

strathmore · 05-13-2006, 06:51 AM

If kissing is out...or anyway...
I find that, as the 2nd male in MFM, a nice slow massage for the lady works very well. It raises the comfort level and trust, as well as getting the juices flowing for all.

**BiloxiCouple** · 05-13-2006, 06:52 AM

Take your clothes off and have sex. Or leave them on and have sex.

Keep it simple

meandher2go · 05-13-2006, 07:25 AM

we have done the massage thing and its great.

the best ever was getting naked and quickly jumping into the hot tub. THATS a great ice breaker. then whatever happens ...........

Amanda69 · 05-13-2006, 08:51 AM

I vote for the massage...great way to start and helps relax everyone.

wiscpl · 05-13-2006, 11:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by meandher2go

we have done the massage thing and its great.

the best ever was getting naked and quickly jumping into the hot tub. THATS a great ice breaker. then whatever happens ...........

We prefer this method as most people become comfortable in this situation. When we have guests over we'll ask them (never been turned down yet) if they would like to use the hot tub with us. They can either use the bathroom to disrobe or do it right in front of us. facelick Once they are in the tub 90% of you is covered by water so you're still beng risky but completely covered. If hands begin to venture all the better.

intuition897 · 05-13-2006, 01:46 PM

The 'no kissing' rule makes it more difficult.

When you are kissing someone, your mouths are busy. For some reason, when your mouth is not occupied with kissing, there is this compulsion to fill the awkward silence with some kind of vocalization. Which, for me, is just plain wierd. I'm not a dirty talker, never have been, likely never will be. Or a talker at all. At least in bed!

I must get it all out of my system on here.

Humour works well, I think. Massages work well. Dancing, if you're meeting out at a bar or something, can be a nice prelude. Then it's just that much easier once you head somewhere more private. Playing a flirty game of pool, a dip inthe hot tub, a game of truth or dare, strip poker... Just use your imagination. This is supposed to be fun...all of it. Not just the screwin', but the flirting and seduction, too.

DGrey · 05-13-2006, 02:07 PM

Strip poker...works every time!

E

Tojo99 · 05-13-2006, 02:12 PM

Great ideas!
We really like the hot tub idea, however there won't be one availabe where we're meeting

The massage could work, however I'm worried about the lack of kissing. She's ok with kissing anywhere except the lips (she wants that reserved for me.)

After talking some we're leaning toward the slowly undressing each other.

Next Saturday is the day! We're already pretty excited!

strathmore · 11-28-2007, 02:14 PM

I realize a few months have passed, but how did it go?

Inquiring minds want to know...

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05-13-2006, 12:15 AM	#1 (permalink)
Tojo99 Active Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 11 Location: Central Florida	Good ice breaker or opener to sex.. My wife and I have had one awesome experience and are ready to try again (with the same guy.) The first time she was VERY nervious and unsure how to start so after we met for dinner we came up with the idea of having her blindfolded and ready in bed when he came in. That way she was unsure of who was doing what, and didn't have to go through the ackwardness of undressing in front of him. This time we will skip the blindfold but are still unsure of a good way to start. I also need to mention that kissing the other guy on the mouth is out. Without the kissing, we don't know really how to get the ball rolling once he comes in the room. Once everyone's undressed and in bed there's no problem, we would just like a good 'opening' strategy. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.

05-13-2006, 02:54 AM	#2 (permalink)
makingtime4fun Registered Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 6 Location: salt lake city Status: couple Swing Lifestyle Name:makingtime4fun	Re: Good ice breaker or opener to sex.. I know for me it was awkward to undress myself in front of other people. My former boyfriend did find one way to break the ice for all of us and that was to have them undress me. It was a good way to start foreplay and it helped to slow it down enough that you had time to move past the awkward moments before the sex starts. They usually spent about 10 minutes undressing me and then I would spend about 10 minutes undressing them. We had a lot of foreplay during those 20 minutes and all nerves were gone after about the first 30 seconds. I think it was better because the sex started while we were still dressed and that made it more sensual instead of just plain sex.

05-13-2006, 06:51 AM	#3 (permalink)
strathmore Venerated male slut Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 146 Location: Ontario Canada Status: Single Male (Widower) Swing Lifestyle Name:strathmore	Re: Good ice breaker or opener to sex.. If kissing is out...or anyway... I find that, as the 2nd male in MFM, a nice slow massage for the lady works very well. It raises the comfort level and trust, as well as getting the juices flowing for all.

05-13-2006, 06:52 AM	#4 (permalink)
BiloxiCouple Julie's Helper Join Date: Sep 2002 Posts: 4,002 Location: Biloxi, Mississippi Status: Couple with benefits and retired Swing Lifestyle Name:graceful	Re: Good ice breaker or opener to sex.. Take your clothes off and have sex. Or leave them on and have sex. Keep it simple
	__________________ *Live in the moment before they are gone.*

05-13-2006, 07:25 AM	#5 (permalink)
meandher2go Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 307 Location: mass Status: Couple	Re: Good ice breaker or opener to sex.. we have done the massage thing and its great. the best ever was getting naked and quickly jumping into the hot tub. THATS a great ice breaker. then whatever happens ...........
	__________________ .

05-13-2006, 08:51 AM	#6 (permalink)
Amanda69 Swingers Board Addict Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 907 Location: Mississauga, ON Canada Status: couple	Re: Good ice breaker or opener to sex.. I vote for the massage...great way to start and helps relax everyone.
	__________________ Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one's definition of your life; define yourself. "Harvey Fierstein"

05-13-2006, 01:46 PM	#8 (permalink)
intuition897 Canadian, eh? Join Date: Sep 2004 Posts: 2,633 Location: Kingston, ON Status: Couple Swing Lifestyle Name:intuition897	Re: Good ice breaker or opener to sex.. The 'no kissing' rule makes it more difficult. When you are kissing someone, your mouths are busy. For some reason, when your mouth is not occupied with kissing, there is this compulsion to fill the awkward silence with some kind of vocalization. Which, for me, is just plain wierd. I'm not a dirty talker, never have been, likely never will be. Or a talker at all. At least in bed! I must get it all out of my system on here. Humour works well, I think. Massages work well. Dancing, if you're meeting out at a bar or something, can be a nice prelude. Then it's just that much easier once you head somewhere more private. Playing a flirty game of pool, a dip inthe hot tub, a game of truth or dare, strip poker... Just use your imagination. This is supposed to be fun...all of it. Not just the screwin', but the flirting and seduction, too.
	__________________ Fear is a symptom of ignorance. Knowledge is the cure.

05-13-2006, 02:07 PM	#9 (permalink)
DGrey Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 386 Location: Exit 13A Thank you very much! Status: Married Female Swing Lifestyle Name:DGrey	Re: Good ice breaker or opener to sex.. Strip poker...works every time! E
	__________________ Erika & Dino i like your body...i lke what it does, i like its hows...i like kissing this and that of you. -- e.e. cummings

05-13-2006, 02:12 PM	#10 (permalink)
Tojo99 Active Member Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 11 Location: Central Florida	Re: Good ice breaker or opener to sex.. Great ideas! We really like the hot tub idea, however there won't be one availabe where we're meeting The massage could work, however I'm worried about the lack of kissing. She's ok with kissing anywhere except the lips (she wants that reserved for me.) After talking some we're leaning toward the slowly undressing each other. Next Saturday is the day! We're already pretty excited!

11-28-2007, 02:14 PM	#11 (permalink)
strathmore Venerated male slut Join Date: Feb 2006 Posts: 146 Location: Ontario Canada Status: Single Male (Widower) Swing Lifestyle Name:strathmore	Re: Good ice breaker or opener to sex.. I realize a few months have passed, but how did it go? Inquiring minds want to know...

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