Orgasm: How important is it?

[LikeMinds321]

I've been reading about men not always having an orgasm during swinging (for various reasons). I get the feeling it isn't a real big issue for men, maybe I'm wrong here.

I would like to know if women always orgasm, nearly always, or even if there are some of you who never orgasm?

I'd like to know how important women feel an orgasm is to their (and their partners) pleasure. Men, you too can let me know how you feel, both about your own orgasm, and about whether or not it's important to you that the woman you're with has an orgasm.

Is an orgasm required for you to feel your play has been successful?

Thank you for any insight you can provide.

Mrs. LM

[kandjboyntonbch]

As the male of my relationship, I can tell you that the little woman doesn't care in the sense of 'It MUST happen or ELSE', - when she wants to have an orgasm and it's not 'going' right, I either step up the pace or she brings hands into play! In short, it's as important and she wants it to be and we think that's healthy.

[69at47]

I don't get a nut every time, but that is OK. I get off on knowing that she is having an orgasm. I guess that is why I like to sharing girlfriends with other men/women. I really like it when a GF pulls out the toys and starts having some fun while I watch.

[MrsBliss]

I orgasm quite easy. When I am with my husband it is definately not the most important thing. If I really want it to happen than I will just use my hands and I wil orgasm anyway.

I think that when I start swinging that maybe the first couple of times I will be nervous and might be having problems orgasming, but it would be more important to me when just having sex instead of making love with my husband.

So the answer is Yes, while swinging I want to orgasm and to be honest one time will not be enough ;-)

Kiss!

[wildchld97]

For me personally (as a woman) it's not important to orgasm with another partner because I know that my husband will step in and take care of things....or I will take care of things myself.

I've learned that when we're with a new couple, I get a version of stage fright the first few times. Hubby knows this and he'll take over after a period of time.

From my experience, women were the ones who were more understanding and didn't put pressure on me...but the men were the ones with the egos who felt like they*needed* to have the me orgasm in order to feel like they've accomplished their mission. Don't get me wrong...it ALL feels great...but until I feel comfortable with someone they're just not going to bring me to that level and I'm ok with that and we expect others to be ok with it too.

[mrs good times]

It's difficult for me to have an orgasm anytime so I have never had one swinging. It takes me 20-30 minutes of constant stimulation and most men aren't up to the task so I or Mr. take care of me when we get home. Sometimes I wish it was easier but I'll keep practicing until I get it.

[tisha]

Its very important, after all, What is sex with the release ?
just my opinion. T

[fun_couple]

I always orgasm with my DH unless its the middle of the night & I'm being woken up... But he knows, I'll be o.k. with him getting off, so to speak quickly so I can get back to sleep. But with swing friends, it takes me time to get compfortable also... DH actually has had problems orgasming with swing friends, Only because he worries if I'm o.k. with everything, & it holds him back, (He never never had a problem getting it hard & keeping it hard for hours though!)

[Kermit]

Originally posted by fun_couple
I always orgasm with my DH unless its the middle of the night & I'm being woken up...

Are you saying you don't like waking up to someone pleasuring you? I'd have to say I find it to be one of the most enjoyable things. But I suppose I'm odd: some of my horniest moments have occurred when I have been half-asleep.
As far as the importance of orgasm, though... Piggy and I are pretty new to all this but I think the majority of our encounters have not resulted in either of us getting off. I get the impression that she doesn't really mind, but I will guiltily admit that it leaves things feeling somewhat incomplete, in my view. (But fun nonetheless, of course!)

[fun_couple]

What I actually what I am saying is...... If there is a time when I don't orgasm, it would be when I am woken up in the night. ( hubby is usually well on his way, if he wakes me up, & because I'm asleep, it takes me longer to be where he already is, So I'll let his do his thing & back to sleep we go.(But! this isn't always the case) I have had many many awsome middle of the night orgasms myself!

[JustAskJulie]

This is a really good question. I have always gotten the impression that the male orgasm seems to have much more importance put on it (by both men and women) than the females orgasm.

In club/ large group situations the liklihood of me having an orgasm is very low because I'm often too (easily) distracted by what is going on around me.

[RockrcplOrlando]

This is the hubby, and i just want to say i'd much rather give than receive. It also varies due to comfort level, the more comfortable i am with the woman, the more likely i am to try to orgasm.

[good times]

Like Julie I get distracted easily at the clubs, so only rarely have an orgasm there. but when we get home after the party, I usually make up for that oversight real quick.

[LikeMinds321]

Thus far, if I understand the posts correctly, woman may not orgasm during swinging and that is OK with them. I'm feeling so relieved!!!

Mrs. Good Times shared that it can take her a while to reach orgasm, same for me--and it has never come with penetration, not yet anyway.

I have been spoiled by Mr. LM, in that he has an orgasm every time, whether through vaginal or oral stimulation. I love to see him cum and I hope I can bring my male playmates to an orgasm as well; I like to please, but I now will be more understanding (and not feel bad about myself) if my playmate doesn't cum.

Mrs. LM

[LikeMinds321]

Found this old thread of mine and want to bring it forward for more comments.

I'll post again to get it started at the top of a new page and see what happens . . .

LM