When are you no longer considered a virgin? Opinions needed

[herpob]

When are you no longer considered a virgin? Opinions needed

Originally Posted by theflamekasters

the mrs. lost hers at 15 i think, my first sexaul encounter was at 8, and my losing it story was rather interesting, and not sure how to vote on this subject. I was 15 or 16 and had been dating this girl for a while, we had taken a true love waits class, and decided to wait, now in the mean time we did everything else, so one night when we where in my room, my mom in the living room we are playing, and she say fuck me in the ass, so i did, i shot my load in her ass. Now the mrs. and i have debated it much, did i love my viriginity then, or was it at 19 when i was in college?

Originally Posted by herpob

This would make a GREAt topic for discussion if it has not already been done. I teach health and this is a VERY common subject that comes up with all the kids, especially the girls. I am going to search the topic and see if it has been posted. I'll link it back here if possible.

Did you have sex in high school?


As posted from a member “theflamekasters” I got a great idea, just what does everyone consider a virgin to be? Or better yet when do you think you are no longer a virgin?


When are you no longer considered a virgin?

Are you are no longer a virgin if you have had any kind of sex?
Are there are different degrees or levels of virginity?

I know we can be Oral virgins, anal virgins, 3some virgins, MfM, virgins, fmf virgins, group virgins, or orgy virgins, but that is not what I am talking about.


Let’s begin with a definition of virginity:

Virginity is the state of being a virgin. Historically, virgin referred to a young woman/male with no sexual experience (see Etymology), but in modern usage, the term can apply regardless of age or gender. Both historical and modern definitions vary in regard to what kind of sexual activity or experience determines virginity, and whether it is a physical, psychological, or spiritual state.

Soooo...

When are you no longer considered a virgin?

I did my best here and welcome any ideas...

[herpob]

I personally felt like any intercourse ended virgin status. But after reading the definition I am beginning to lean toward any sexual experience.

[Malachista]

If Tab A enterd Slot B or slot C.....of course all gets way more comlicated with lesbians....

[JustAskJulie]

Originally Posted by herpob

When are you no longer considered a virgin? Opinions needed



I know we can be Oral virgins, anal virgins, 3some virgins, MfM, virgins, fmf virgins, group virgins, or orgy virgins, but that is not what I am talking about.

and don't forget bi-virginity....

Why not? It seems that by today's defination you do exactly that. As more and more young people are doing EXACTLY what flamekasters did and sex doesn't include anything other than vaginal intercourse evidently. It's kinda hard for me to look at these things and really understand the logic that is used today. When I was growing up, we were more likely to have vaginal intercourse than to even think about letting a guy stick it in our ass (as an alternative) and back then I didn't even really like the idea of oral sex.

I guess for me there is just what you posted above, multiple levels of virginity. And beyond that evidently you can also regain your virginity by just claiming it and not having sex for however long (another piece of logic I completely don't get).

So when did I LOSE my virginity? When I had vaginal sex for the first time.

[sexcupid]

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

So when did I LOSE my virginity? When I had vaginal sex for the first time.

I agree with this.

As for the Mr of theflamekasters...I would say you were no longer a virgin after the anal penetration in h.s.

One of the girls that I knew throughout high school and into college called herself a 'technical virgin' because she had never had vaginal penetration...but as she put it, there's still plenty more to do than just that.

It's a fine line...and maybe it's partly my upbringing (the downfall of us all...)...but to no longer be a virgin as a female was for penile penetration into the vagina (why? because that's what seems to be universally accepted as losing your virginity...some girls do anal to be a 'technical virgin' so if being one when you get married is that important because of religion or culture). The sticky wicket comes in that for the guys, either anal or vaginal penetration would suffice to take the virgin status away because you are actively having sex (not a handjob, blowjob, etc).

Virginity used to be "proven" by evidence of an intact hymen (a perforated piece of skin across the opening of the vagina).

For example, in some cultures a bloody sheet is displayed the next day to imply that the virgin bled from a torn hymen. The certificate from a gynecological exam has also been offered to establish an "intact" hymen.

However, hymens vary considerable down to almost non-existent, start in a "torn" condition (so menses pass through), and can be easily be torn from exercise, sports, tampons, masturbation, yada, yada, yada. Some girls can do PIV and never be aware they had a hymen "get in the way" of penetration.

This gets us back to the unusable definitions "a virgin has an {virtually} intact {virtual} hymen unpenetrated by a {virtual?} penis". Or, "a virgin has a penis which has never penetrated a {virtual} hymen".

And then there's the wonderful flip side of the coin -- "Tonight, honey, I'm a virgin!"

[herpob]

Originally Posted by sexcupid

I agree with this.

As for the Mr of theflamekasters...I would say you were no longer a virgin after the anal penetration in h.s.

One of the girls that I knew throughout high school and into college called herself a 'technical virgin' because she had never had vaginal penetration...but as she put it, there's still plenty more to do than just that.

It's a fine line...and maybe it's partly my upbringing (the downfall of us all...)...but to no longer be a virgin as a female was for penile penetration into the vagina (why? because that's what seems to be universally accepted as losing your virginity...some girls do anal to be a 'technical virgin' so if being one when you get married is that important because of religion or culture). The sticky wicket comes in that for the guys, either anal or vaginal penetration would suffice to take the virgin status away because you are actively having sex (not a handjob, blowjob, etc).

I agree with you guys and Julie.

Well I have always felt vaginal penetration was the the end. Then for years all the girls in high school were talking about all anal sex they have so the remain a "virgin," heck they were having more sex than I was and I'm married. Now I am teaching in middle school and they have all sorts of sex doing all sorts of crazy things (much like we adults here ) so they are having even more sex than ever before. These kids are just as experienced sexually as I am now minus vaginal for most of them, but with regards to all else - holy cow!!! They log more hours than me anally and orally, group, and orgy in a weekend to hear them tell it. They just can't be virgins even if they never had vaginal, they are WAY to experienced.

I am definite about the degrees of virginity and yes thanks Julie for the "bi-virginity" & that was me until recently, now I'm working in the husband since he worked so hard on me for all those years - pay back is fun...

[herpob]

EVERYONE - don't forget you get vote on more than one thing if needed.

[Trace Ekies]

It seems simple to me...

If you found some way to act out some fantasy that you've harbored for some time, either a little while or a long while and the other person or persons is or were not your spouse then you are no longer a virgin.

See, it's simple...

Trace

I re-read the list and decided that if you got into the lifestyle with the intent of having sex with someone other than your spouse and you performed any of the things on the list with someone other than your spouse you have lost your virginity...Period...

If you believe you haven't then Mrs. Ekies and I have some work to do.

If you follow the list item by item then you could, theoretically, lose your virginity with each and every step...

Try to get your head around that...

[herpob]

Originally Posted by Trace Ekies

It seems simple to me...

If you found some way to act out some fantasy that you've harbored for some time, either a little while or a long while and the other person or persons is or were not your spouse then you are no longer a virgin.

See, it's simple...

Trace

I re-read the list and decided that if you got into the lifestyle with the intent of having sex with someone other than your spouse and you performed any of the things on the list with someone other than your spouse you have lost your virginity...Period...

If you believe you haven't then Mrs. Ekies and I have some work to do.

If you follow the list item by item then you could, theoretically, lose your virginity with each and every step...

Try to get your head around that...

EXCELLENT!

[Just Passing By]

Virginity is a specfic term that means what it means.
The more relavant question instead ought to be "what is sexually active ?"
Most of list would count. Anything that involves another person and one of you have orgasm, definitely. Anything that involved another person, and at least one set of genital touched "with intent" , yup.
Non genital erogous zones in play, could be argued.

[SecretAsianMan]

In my own tiny little view of the universe:

A classical "virgin" was one who had not yet successfully engaged in intercourse (vaginal or anal) with another partner. This could be through penile-vaginal or penile-anal ...and not even necessarily needing a natural-penis. (I would certainly not classify a gal who's been fucked with a strap-on or penetrated by a dildo to be a "virgin")

However, since I define it as "with a partner" - doing oneself with a dildo/vibe wouldn't technically qualify as losing one's virginity

Just as a guy masturbating with an artificial vagina would still be a virgin in my little universe.


This is, however based on "classical" views of virginity ... there are "other" types of virginity which can be broken with each new ground broken in one's sexual explorations. For example, if one has never been anally penetrated before - in that realm, they would still be considered virgins no matter how often they had vaginal sex prior to that.

[normals]

The word Virgin brings back fond memories of ideals and expectations during a horny youth.


However it seems to me that your sexual development is a continuum perhaps starting with dreams or just pleasant sensations

The original definition of "untouched by a male" English oxford dictionary many years ago was either a euphemism of the times or just downright confusing.

I struggle with the modern version of Virgin as a replacement for "first" or something that you have not yet done.

For me Virgin has a very specific meaning in that sexual continuum and that the state before a vagina is fully penetrated by a penis. When it sinks all the way in and is home for the very first time is when Virginity is lost. It is a moment in time.

This is reasoning is partially based on the procreativity of the action and the moment of realisation that happened.

Other forms of sexy entertainment including from You show me yours and I'll show you mine" to oral, anal, etc are important and good but in my humble opinion do not constitute the loss of a virginity.

I don't want to get to a point where we sully the word and thus the moment (because we don't have a good replacement word for this special moment) by "being a virgin" to a particular bend in the road or taking the "virginity" of a new kitchen chair.

[Edison Carter]

Susan here-- How about we eliminate the use of the term 'virgin' for anything sexual. It has a ridiculous connotation, especially for women, that we should be well past by now.