Too Big

[28volts]

That's what my wife says anyway.The problem is my wife loves anal and when I try to penetrate after working it awhile,she cannot stand the pain.She says my head is to big. We have done anal in the past several times..a couple of years ago.She does not know why my head feels bigger now.We recently were at a party and my wife was enjoying anal from another man .I have told her I miss anal and we have tried to do it again recently,but my head is to big. She said his was smaller in girth. Still it's something that I cannot seem to satisfy her with. facelick..Please help me anyway you can.Can we use creams? Do I need to work at it longer? Anyone in the same situation,how did you do it? :whiteflag

Mr S

[MoonLightKiss]

There are some creams on the market that contain benzocaine that can be used to alleviate pain. However, I do not recommend their use at all. Pain is your bodies way of telling you that damage is being done to it. If you numb yourself to the pain then you do not know damage is being done until its too late.

As far as anal sex and how you go about doing it again with your wife. I honestly do not know what to say. If indeed you are thick and that is the source of the problem, I would say there isn't much you can do. My advice would then be, don't worry so much on whether you can do anal with your wife and find other things in the bedroom you enjoy.

Many couples have successful sex lives and enjoy swinging without anal.

[BiloxiCouple]

Just don't use a hard-on with her when you start. Keep it soft when you put it, then let it get hard. Shouldn't be a problem then.

[DGrey]

Pain doesn't necessarily mean you're doing damage to your body. Pain can be a subconscious response to physical stimulus as well. Have you tried different positions? A great deal of lube is necessary since it's not a self-lubricating part of the body. When it's just you and your wife in the privacy of your own home, a few glasses of wine wouldn't hurt either. I don't condone using alcohol use to relax though in swinging settings but at home, sometimes it can help. Also, we've found that sometimes a condom can help ease things in as well.

E

[MoonLightKiss]

I am sorry I should have been more clear. By pain I meant real severe pain. The kind thats nearly intolerable. Of course pain in certain situations are okay, even pleasurable. I was referring to the types of pain that can cause problems later. The tissues there are thin and while some pain is enjoyable, excruciating pain can be a sign of tissues tearing and mild bleeding later. Not a major problem but one that can happen. Which is why I hesitate to recommend creams that numb the area.

However, Dgrey is right, plenty of lube does help. The more you have the easier it might be.

[Tybee Swing]

Originally Posted by 28volts

She says my head is too big.

Anyone in the same situation, how did you do it? :whiteflag

Same situation here, and for exactly the same reason. Mr. Tybee has thick girth and a particularly very thick head. I cannot take it back there. Yes, tried everything, and the pain is too much. The day after, sometimes two days after is also painful and not worth it. He doesn't want to hurt me, either.

What we do about it now: nothing. Some things are just not meant for everybody, and not everybody can do everything. Because he's big, we can enjoy many positions that other-endowed may not be able to enjoy. There are pros and cons to everything, know what I mean? He may not get to enjoy anal due to his size, but he can enjoy many other things.

Originally Posted by 28volts

We recently were at a party and my wife was enjoying anal from another man. I have told her I miss anal and we have tried to do it again recently, but my head is too big. She said his was smaller in girth. Still it's something that I cannot seem to satisfy her with.

You can satisfy her in many other ways. If the anal just does not work for the two of you, you might just have to let that go. Or, get creative with it. One idea for you: Use a narrow and smooth toy back there on her. If you like, try using the narrow/small toy back there, while you're inside her pussy at the same time. This might be a way to satisfy her anally (seems important to you) while not hurting her and while getting a lot of pleasure yourself, at the same time.

If it makes you sad to see her enjoying anal with a narrower-endowed man, you certainly should share your feelings with her. Maybe this is something that you'd rather not have in swinging, if you can't partake of it, too.

Question: have you done any anal in swinging? Are there some women out there that are willing and able to take your size in their back door? If you can enjoy anal with other women, and your wife can enjoy anal with other men and you're both fine with that, there's one solution for you. It just depends on the two of you and how you both feel about anal in swinging, especially if the two of you can't work out having anal between you.

What we do about that, personally: Originally, we felt that we should leave anal out of swinging entirely. (We've never even had anal or attempted anal with anybody else other than each other, by the way.) We've re-evaluated that since then. I told him that if there's a woman out there willing to take him that way, he was more than welcome to go for it, as far as I'm concerned. As for me, I might try anal with a much smaller-endowed man, under the right circumstances, if my husband agreed and was very comfortable with it (since he can't get in there himself; it depends on how he feels). However, I don't feel like I'm missing out on anything in not having anal. I've only ever attempted/experienced it with my husband, I don't know how a smaller one would be in there, but I really don't care about anal, to tell the truth. So for me, it's a big maybe. For him, I'm all for it, if he can find somebody very interested. I'll cheer him on all the way, and I'll say a Hail Mary for her.

[28volts]

Originally Posted by BiloxiCouple

Just don't use a hard-on with her when you start. Keep it soft when you put it, then let it get hard. Shouldn't be a problem then.

Never tried this before...how do you push it in if it's soft? Or do you do it semi hard?
Mr S

[28volts]

Originally Posted by Tybee Swing

You can satisfy her in many other ways. If the anal just does not work for the two of you, you might just have to let that go. Or, get creative with it. One idea for you: Use a narrow and smooth toy back there on her. If you like, try using the narrow/small toy back there, while you're inside her pussy at the same time. This might be a way to satisfy her anally (seems important to you) while not hurting her and while getting a lot of pleasure yourself, at the same time.

If it makes you sad to see her enjoying anal with a narrower-endowed man, you certainly should share your feelings with her. Maybe this is something that you'd rather not have in swinging, if you can't partake of it, too.

Question: have you done any anal in swinging? Are there some women out there that are willing and able to take your size in their back door? If you can enjoy anal with other women, and your wife can enjoy anal with other men and you're both fine with that, there's one solution for you. It just depends on the two of you and how you both feel about anal in swinging, especially if the two of you can't work out having anal between you.

She enjoys feeling my head in the front door....just not the back.I use my thumb when doggie and at most two fingers when lickin. facelick That drives her up the wall .
I have told her about my feelings and doing anal with another woman has not come up yet. I am sure I would enjoy it ,but probably not as much as I would if it was her.We want to do a DP and I have always wanted to take her from behind, but I guess for now I will have to use the front door.
I would like to hear from the guys on this and how you felt or got over it?

Mr S

[prettylady]

Originally Posted by 28volts

Never tried this before...how do you push it in if it's soft? Or do you do it semi hard?
Mr S

Shoe horn
Your friend,
Prettylady

[menos]

Well, not knowing the relative size of both your parts , I'l say that there are both physical and psychological parts to anal intercourse. She may have a thing about you "hurting her" one time and therefore is abnormally tense and locks down and can't relax at the first uncomfortable feelings. Then too, you can releave the too full feeling by withdrawing every time and inserting very slowly until she is fully relaxed and hot for sex. She should also be very hot for sex from vaginal or oral play, as well as some ass play that carefuly streches her sphincter. Remember that the sphincter is normally stretched from the inside out, rather than from the outside in. Playing with fingers and expanding them on exit would help to facillitate her opening up. I'm sure that she has passed bigger diameter things than your cock! Work slowly and carefully and use huge amounts of lube until you both get it worked out. Good luck!

[screaminggood]

Doggie is more painful...try putting her on top facing away from you and let her work it in.

[twohots4u2]

Ahh! Where there is a will there is a way! Tina always was too apprehensive to try anal, as she thought that I, with my average size, would be too big for her. Then, one day while we were chatting about anal, she asked me, "Well, if it is so good, will you let me try my strap-on on you?" What could I say but, "Why of course, Honey." She did, I found that I liked it, she was surprised it felt good to me, and she really got a power trip from it.

However, it got her to really thinking about trying anal. So, she tried a medium sized dildo on herself several times to see what it would be like. The first time it was uncomfortable to her. The second time she said that it felt good. :rollseyes

Very soon after that we had an MFM with a guy who had a very large (6"X9") dick. To get her ready for it, he and I played with her for almost an hour, getting her super hot and giving her a mind-bending orgasm. That opened her up! She was able to take his large dick in her pussy, and then, after some lube and fingering, in her ass. She is small and we were all amazed that she could take all of him in her ass. She found that liked anal better than regular sex! The bottom line is that she is now a convert to anal.

We feel that the bottom line is for her to climax first to relax all the muscles, and then have fun.