Ladies: Do you require a warning?

[JustAskJulie]

I think I'm an oddball when it comes to this so I'm going to ask and find out just how odd.

Ladies, when you are giving a guy a blowjob do you require that he warn you first? If so, what do you do when he warns you he's about to come? Do you pull his dick out so that he doesn't come in your mouth? Keep sucking and swallow? Or something in between?

And the most important question... does your response differ when it's YOUR man vs someone you are swinging with?

[athena2910]

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

I think I'm an oddball when it comes to this so I'm going to ask and find out just how odd.

Ladies, when you are giving a guy a blowjob do you require that he warn you first? If so, what do you do when he warns you he's about to come? Do you pull his dick out so that he doesn't come in your mouth? Keep sucking and swallow? Or something in between?

And the most important question... does your response differ when it's YOUR man vs someone you are swinging with?

With my current lover (and for that matter, my past lovers) I can almost always tell when they're going to come, so no warning is necessary.

Sometimes I swallow and sometimes I don't. But I don't mind liking his cock after he's come, or letting him come on me. But I can't answer your most important question, since I'm not currently swinging. (But since I love to give bjs, I can't imagine I'd treat some other guy differently.)

Athena

[LikeMinds321]

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

Ladies, when you are giving a guy a blowjob do you require that he warn you first? If so, what do you do when he warns you he's about to come? Do you pull his dick out so that he doesn't come in your mouth? Keep sucking and swallow? Or something in between?

And the most important question... does your response differ when it's YOUR man vs someone you are swinging with?

I don't require it, but I've often asked him to tell me when he's about to come if I think it's going to happen soon. [If it's a longtime playpartner I know him well enough that either I don't have to ask anymore, or he knows enough to tell me.]

I like knowing when it's about to happen because it heightens my excitement. Coming in my mouth is no problem, so the only reason this would be brought up beforehand is if we want to discuss our preference for something else, since men often like to come on a women's breasts or face (which happened to me the first time recently and I still haven't decided what I think of that).

Swallowing is okay by me. If I would ever be repelled by the taste of his come I'd spit it out. But this has never been a problem.

My response is the same whether it's Mr LM or a playmate. The major difference is that I KNOW Mr LM so well that I know when he's about to come. Most playmates are hard for me to 'read' when they're about to come and this is why I ask them to tell me.

LM

[tribbles]

No warnings needed here but most do warn me. Guess someone trained them

I can tell with my hubby. I can tell with most guys but I don't care if they warn me cuz I most often keep sucking but let the cum dripple out of my mouth onto my hands to add more 'lube' that I keep stroking to the last second with.

S

[Amanda69]

Absolutely a warning.

One I have a strong gag reflex and contrary to what some believe a very small mouth.

Two I am I guess unusual in that I really don't like the taste of sperm so I prefer they do not come in my mouth. (my partner and I have come up with a great way to solve this by having oral sex in a shower, I can discretely let the cum come out of my mouth and still continue to suck him off)

Three I like when they come inside me (in a condom) as I love the feeling of the penis spasming inside of me.

I also find most men do give a warning.

[bear_and_babe]

I like it when a guy tells me he is getting ready to cum. I don't mind it in my mouth, but I don't swallow. To me it is like swallowing a big raw oyster! YUCK!! I usually just let it run down my hand and like another poster said just use it for more lube to keep stroking.

With Bear I can always tell when he is going to cum. I will sometimes swallow him if I know it is going to be a small load.

[JP51]

From the guy side, I always tell...give a warning...if just polite. That way the lady, even my wife can decide what she wants to do...sometimes is diffrent, sometimes she swallows, sometime I cum on her breasts etc...ditto with partners.

[JustAskJulie]

Ok, this question came up from listening to an episode of Swingercast (I'm hooked I'll admit it). Now granted these guys aren't expert swingers or experts on swinging and everyone has their own opinion. But she said something and it got me thinking that maybe it is the case and I'm just so completely different that I hadn't ever realized it. Her statement was something to the affect that it was a major "faux pas" if a guy didn't warn the woman he was about to come and let her tell him what to do from there. Now, I know couples who are adament about being told simply because she doesn't like come in her mouth, doesn't swallow or that's something they save for each other, or whatever the reason... but I'd never heard it as an overall swinging no-no. Personally, I think it's just one of those things that should be discussed up front if a woman expects it.

[prettylady]

Ok here I go, I am about to show the green behind my ears AGAIN.
I am just getting use to letting my lover (Dog) know about what I want. I am just getting us to looking him in the eyes and saying yes babe I want to swing. I have never been with a man so open and honest, I am still a little gun shy about saying what I want.
Now, here is where I show my green.
Geez if only you guys could see how much I am stuggling getting this out.
OK, how do you say, hey I need you to tell me when you are going to cum.
is it over dinner at the resturant? Do you sit down at on the bed and say ok here are my hard limits, and soft limits.
I know in the end that setting limits is the only way to go. But when and how do you approach this topic?
Do my questions make sence?
What color does red(my face) and green(my ears) make. That is the shade of me right now.
You guys are the best and I know you wont laugh at me....well ok maybe you will, but I know you will answer my question honestly.

OH so sorry Julie, I robed you of your thread. I will post this in new swingers so my question can be answered there. Surrender

Your friend,
Prettylady

[tribbles]

I find the concept of swinging no-no's beyond the simple rules of: Ask before touching and no means no, very confusing.

We are already way outside the society norm to be swinging in the first place. Do we think we have to all fit in some swingers mold someone else created?

If I was into fitting into molds in society, would I dare to step outside of them to be a swinger?

Any special 'rules' or desires I want, I have learned to speak up about. Period.

I don't expect a 'norm' of behaviors or looks or even attitude. We are all doing this as individuals and everything about it will be how we want it, not some mold or 'norm' made by anyone else.

Julie,
Knowing your experience level and that it is still possible to wonder if how you like it 'fits' into what is 'normal' is a bit scary.
Do we ever quit trying to 'fit in'? Or wondering if we do?

(We know we don't fit in, so many that makes it easier for us to just do our own thing).

S

[TNT]

I had to think about this one as there are few times that the man coming through a blow job is the way I want the night to possibly end.

I don't "require" a warning, but one is definitely nice. There are times I swallow and times I don't want to swallow, it greatly depends on my mood at the time. A warning allows me to have a split second to assess how I feel at the moment and what I want...either swallow, swallow a little with the rest squirted on my face, pull back and continue with a hand-job with squirting on my chest or...stopping and taking a break or stopping and mounting my partner.

Ted always gives a warning...bascially because we enjoy bringing each other to the brink and then backing off, taking a breather and then continuing the play. I like Ted's warning (not that I really need one from him)...there are times I hear it and choose to totally ignore it and continue to completion as he has the loveliest smile on his face afterwards and calls me an evil wench


Teresa

[Shynquiet]

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

I think I'm an oddball when it comes to this so I'm going to ask and find out just how odd.

Ladies, when you are giving a guy a blowjob do you require that he warn you first? If so, what do you do when he warns you he's about to come? Do you pull his dick out so that he doesn't come in your mouth? Keep sucking and swallow? Or something in between?

And the most important question... does your response differ when it's YOUR man vs someone you are swinging with?

My personal opinion....

I like giving blowjobs, when I do give them I DO require warning. Even from my husband. With hubby, I wait until he's finished cumming before I swallow, but for everyone else, no exception, I will not swallow. He either has to pull out and cum else where or respect my decision to spit. If they do not respect my decision then that's the end of any play time.... period. There is no negotiation involved with it.

[Amanda69]

I find the concept of swinging no-no's beyond the simple rules of: Ask before touching and no means no, very confusing.

tribbles while I have some understanding of why you might find some things confusing I am hoping you are not refering to the two you quoted.

Some things translate from the vanilla world to the swinging world "ask before touching (unless you know me well enough not to have to) and "No Means No" are such things. These are basic concepts that demonstrate respect for singles and couples.

[xxoticangel]

I can honestly say that I have never been surprised by a guy cumming during oral. I love to give oral and always swallow but do appreciate the courtesy of a warning. Some guys will actually try to pull away.

[greaser13]

I know this was directed to the females but as a considerate male I always would notify my partners and let them decide what they wanted. I feel it would be well just rude.....