Sex at that time of the month

HappyCampers · 05-26-2002, 04:45 AM

Reading a recent thread about swinging and menopause reminds me of a question I have had since my early swinging days.

First of all, I never considered my period to be a serious impediment to sex. There is a little added mess to clean up and sanitary precautions that must be taken, but I have always done full vaginal penetration during my period. In my naivite, I assumed that most other women felt the same.

This lead to a real problem on my fourth (fifth maybe?) swinging experience. My boyfriend (now hubby) and I had planned a threesome with one of my close girlfriends. She was only 20 and her period was still a little irregular, and on the night of our date, she showed up and said that she couldn't because she had just started her period a week early. She expected me to understand implicitly, but I totally didn't get it. I ended up embarrassing her and myself really badly. Of course we talked and worked things out because she was a friend (in fact, we swing together about once a year even though we live on separate continents). Still, I learned an important lesson. Some women do NOT want to do the deed when they're on the rag. Can anyone offer a good explanation?

Does it feel uncomfortable, does it seem gross, is there just a certain stigma about menstrual blood? Maybe I am way off base with all of these.

Dayna (the friend) says she just doesn't feel sexy. Sometimes I feel a little blase too (bloated, etc), but I have found that 1 regular strength orgasm relieves cramps and tension better than 50 extra strength Motrin.

Any others out there feel the same as Dayna or me?

Julie and Randie · 05-26-2002, 11:11 AM

I only wish that hubby and I could be more like you! Neither of us really like sex during "that time of the month"...It's messy, feels weird...(too sticky)..and pretty much turns us both off. Okay, OCCASIONALLY we have sex in the shower during my period, but not very often.

Of course, I am one of those lucky girls who only has 3 day periods, too. Perhaps if it were a week long or so, we would learn to like it. For us, those thre days of abstinence leads to a regular sex fest once my period is over.

I'm interested to see what others think about this.

CanadianCouple · 05-26-2002, 04:35 PM

Neither of us are enamoured with sex during periods. Not to say we haven't (we have), but it's something neither of us are very comfortable with. Strangely enough though, J is sometimes VERY horny during her period (if cramps are absent), but she just doesn't feel right about engaging in sex during that time. She'd NEVER have intercourse with a different man while menstrating, that's out for sure. To make things more difficult, her period has always been erratic in timing and duration, and has become even more so as she's gotten older.

Dan

Lorrelei · 10-09-2002, 02:39 AM

I like having intercourse during my non-heavy days of menstruation. But I also enjoy receiving oral sex during my heaviest days! I have a couple of girlfriends who have insisted that I give them my "period schedule" so they can schedule the time to see me and go down on me during my heavy days. They love my blood! This really turns me on.

[ October 09, 2002, 02:40 AM: Message edited by: Lorrelei ]

ddrewd · 10-09-2002, 07:43 AM

I've had a lifelong aversion to blood, so for the longest time I'd never have sex during a woman's period. That is, until I had a horny girlfriend who wanted it when she wanted it. Period. (Sorry about that!

)

And as a true gentleman always assists a lady in need, I had to overcome my qualms and do the manly thing. It may not have been the most enjoyable thing I've ever done in bed, but the lady was satisfied, and that's what counts.

Drew

Perseus · 10-19-2002, 09:39 AM

For me, having sex during a woman’s period is not really a big deal, but I am not sure I could go down on her during that time. In fact, most of the ladies I have met won't do any more then 'play around' when their friend comes to visit. Of course this is not always bad, as it was during one of those times I got to fuck a girlfriend’s tits. They were quite large and it was very erotic for both of us. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="wink.gif" />

Cheers,
Perseus

thestars · 10-19-2002, 10:33 AM

Usually we do not do anything during that time either. But the shower does help keep things a bit cleaner. It is more of a clean issue , I think with most people.I have been told that if you use a diaphram duing a play time, will keep all at bay. I do not have the nerve yet to go in to dr and say hey i need one so we can have fun during the 1 week a month. Just much easier to postpone a week.
From the other posts, sounds more like the clean issue and the instilled value that it is nasty.
Also it does help the cramps.... and that is when the shower comes in handy.

**TNT** · 10-19-2002, 11:29 AM

We have always had sex while I was on my period, but the mess was something that we have always been real careful about.

Here recently I discovered a new product, well don't know how new it really is, but it was something that I had never heard of before until I read about it on another message board.

It's called Instead, and it is a little plastic cup thingy, kind of like a diaphragm, that you insert inside and it holds all the blood. IT'S GREAT! No mess at all. It's so good that no matter what kind of sexual activity you want to do, there is no mess. It definitely has taken all the worries about having sex during that time of month away for us.

Teresa

coolwetbreeze · 10-22-2002, 12:09 PM

Like teresa I have tried the product "Instead". I have never met anyone else that has ever heard of it...I came across it quite by accident one day in my Target store and tried it out. I haven't used it while having sex but I'm glad to hear that it works...that was the whole reason I wanted to try it in the first place...Ladies, if the thought of you reaching in and pulling it out with all that stored up blood will bother you then I would not recommend it for you...My daughter said No WAY!!
I am lucky enough to have a man that doesn't care if Its that time or not...I don't always feel sexy during that time but it sure is nice knowing that when I do want to and sometimes I really want to( must be the hormone thing going)that he is Up for it <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="wink.gif" /> I can't say that I would want to play with a new couple while I was on it though. Even if the guy says he wouldn't mind, I would.

dave_susie2001 · 10-22-2002, 02:03 PM

<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by coolwetbreeze:
 I have never met anyone else that has ever heard of it...I came across it quite by accident one day in my Target store and tried it out. <hr /></blockquote>Target is the only place we can find Instead. Susie loves to use them for her whole period weather or not we have sex. She says that it is neater and there is no odor.

We have tried sex with Instead. Oral is fine. No mess, and as long as she showers after putting it in, everything is is A-OK. Intercourse on the other hand isn't as good. I can't achieve full penetration, as I hit the plastic cup ring. I'm afraid that I'll "knock it loose" and we'll have a flow problem. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="eek.gif" />

But it does work, and it's highly recommended by the Mrs.

Rednski · 10-23-2002, 02:30 AM

Being an unrepentent pervert, when we were first getting together with our now poly like other two it was her time and she had been so looking forward to us and each of our mates were "off to the races" so one thing lead to another and we just used the alternative back entrance. And is something we still do from time to time whether it's that time of the month or not.

redhot_brat · 10-25-2002, 04:39 AM

Just thought I'd add a quick word of warning on this new product "instead" and sex during your period also.
There is a "disease" called endometriosis ---very painful to the unlucky women that have it.It is caused by endometrial tissue backing up into the body cavities instead of flowing down and out of the women as it is suppised to.
This tissue then begins to grow monthly same as it would in the uterus.This causes cysts,tissue masses,and alot of pain.
I don't known whether or not these two things would play any role in causing this backflowing , but as a past sufferer of endo I'd recommend looking into it further before using/doing either.
The worst part of having endo is there are many treatments for it , but no real cures.As long as you still bleed (cycle monthly) you can get it back at anytime.
After suffering with it for 12 yrs I finally had a full hysterecotomy done - no uterus-no endometrial tissue - no probelms!
Just a thought you might wanna consider.
Debra

Quin · 10-25-2002, 07:40 AM

Back when I had a uterus, while on my monthly flow I would turn into Super Nymphette. Thank goodness that this guy I dated for years didn't mind. I never minded the cleaning up afterwards. Can't say that would be the case today.

I just thank God every day for hysterectomies and the fact that I had one in 96.

Quin
<img border="0" alt="[Smiley_sex]" title="" src="graemlins/smilysex.gif" />

DragonsLair · 10-25-2002, 03:57 PM

My husband and I have had sex during my time of the month, on light days. Sometimes I feel very unattractive during this time and sex is the last thing on my mind. But other times, I want sex all the time. Luckily my man doesn't mind the mess either. Good for me.

He does sometimes want to run away the week before my period, tho. I usually get really, really horny that week. <img border="0" alt="[evil]" title="" src="graemlins/devil.gif" />

But I don't think I'd ever want to be with other people during my monthly visitor. It'd be too awkward.

DragonsLair

He is T. I am A. <img border="0" alt="[fun]" title="" src="graemlins/fun.gif" />

OhioCouple · 10-25-2002, 04:27 PM

<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by Quin:
Back when I had a uterus, while on my monthly flow I would turn into Super Nymphette.<hr /></blockquote>I neglected to post on this one, as I thought I was alone in how I felt. I had a hysterectomy in '87 so it has been many years since I have had a period. But for whatever reason my sexuality peaked during that time. I was always horny as all get out and my first husband thought it too dirty and nasty. So the only alternative was the go it alone type thing.

I didn't have my ovaries removed and kinda funny, when it comes around what would normally be my time of the month, I get these cravings for chocolate. I never indulge in sweets and quite frankly don't care for them. On the rare occasions that I do and the hubby sees me getting into the jar of M&M's (which are there for the grandkids) he knows that he is in for a "sweet" treat of his own that night.

Lori

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05-26-2002, 04:45 AM	#1 (permalink)
HappyCampers Registered Join Date: May 2002 Posts: 6 Location: Portland, OR	Sex at that time of the month Reading a recent thread about swinging and menopause reminds me of a question I have had since my early swinging days. First of all, I never considered my period to be a serious impediment to sex. There is a little added mess to clean up and sanitary precautions that must be taken, but I have always done full vaginal penetration during my period. In my naivite, I assumed that most other women felt the same. This lead to a real problem on my fourth (fifth maybe?) swinging experience. My boyfriend (now hubby) and I had planned a threesome with one of my close girlfriends. She was only 20 and her period was still a little irregular, and on the night of our date, she showed up and said that she couldn't because she had just started her period a week early. She expected me to understand implicitly, but I totally didn't get it. I ended up embarrassing her and myself really badly. Of course we talked and worked things out because she was a friend (in fact, we swing together about once a year even though we live on separate continents). Still, I learned an important lesson. Some women do NOT want to do the deed when they're on the rag. Can anyone offer a good explanation? Does it feel uncomfortable, does it seem gross, is there just a certain stigma about menstrual blood? Maybe I am way off base with all of these. Dayna (the friend) says she just doesn't feel sexy. Sometimes I feel a little blase too (bloated, etc), but I have found that 1 regular strength orgasm relieves cramps and tension better than 50 extra strength Motrin. Any others out there feel the same as Dayna or me?
	__________________ --------------------------- He and She

05-26-2002, 11:11 AM	#2 (permalink)
Julie and Randie Active Member Join Date: May 2002 Posts: 15 Location: Westminster, MD	I only wish that hubby and I could be more like you! Neither of us really like sex during "that time of the month"...It's messy, feels weird...(too sticky)..and pretty much turns us both off. Okay, OCCASIONALLY we have sex in the shower during my period, but not very often. Of course, I am one of those lucky girls who only has 3 day periods, too. Perhaps if it were a week long or so, we would learn to like it. For us, those thre days of abstinence leads to a regular sex fest once my period is over. I'm interested to see what others think about this.
	__________________ You only go around once, why not have fun??

10-09-2002, 02:39 AM	#4 (permalink)
Lorrelei Here to Stay Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 54 Location: MI	I like having intercourse during my non-heavy days of menstruation. But I also enjoy receiving oral sex during my heaviest days! I have a couple of girlfriends who have insisted that I give them my "period schedule" so they can schedule the time to see me and go down on me during my heavy days. They love my blood! This really turns me on. <small>[ October 09, 2002, 02:40 AM: Message edited by: Lorrelei ]</small>
	__________________ Lorrelei

10-09-2002, 07:43 AM	#5 (permalink)
ddrewd Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Jun 2002 Posts: 123 Location: On the road in Oklahoma Status: Single Male	I've had a lifelong aversion to blood, so for the longest time I'd never have sex during a woman's period. That is, until I had a horny girlfriend who wanted it when she wanted it. Period. (Sorry about that! ) And as a true gentleman always assists a lady in need, I had to overcome my qualms and do the manly thing. It may not have been the most enjoyable thing I've ever done in bed, but the lady was satisfied, and that's what counts. Drew
	__________________ Drew Coming to a theatre near you!

05-26-2002, 04:35 PM	#3 (permalink)
CanadianCouple Swingers Board Addict Join Date: May 2001 Posts: 1,139 Location: New Brunswick, Canada Status: Married Couple	Neither of us are enamoured with sex during periods. Not to say we haven't (we have), but it's something neither of us are very comfortable with. Strangely enough though, J is sometimes VERY horny during her period (if cramps are absent), but she just doesn't feel right about engaging in sex during that time. She'd NEVER have intercourse with a different man while menstrating, that's out for sure. To make things more difficult, her period has always been erratic in timing and duration, and has become even more so as she's gotten older. Dan

10-19-2002, 09:39 AM	#6 (permalink)
Perseus Long Timer Join Date: Apr 2002 Posts: 161 Location: Winter Park, Fl Status: S. Male seeking Couples and S. Females for good times and possible LTR Swing Lifestyle Name:Perseus	For me, having sex during a woman’s period is not really a big deal, but I am not sure I could go down on her during that time. In fact, most of the ladies I have met won't do any more then 'play around' when their friend comes to visit. Of course this is not always bad, as it was during one of those times I got to fuck a girlfriend’s tits. They were quite large and it was very erotic for both of us. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="wink.gif" /> Cheers, Perseus

10-19-2002, 10:33 AM	#7 (permalink)
thestars Here to Stay Join Date: Jan 2002 Posts: 40 Location: eastern nc Status: couple	Usually we do not do anything during that time either. But the shower does help keep things a bit cleaner. It is more of a clean issue , I think with most people.I have been told that if you use a diaphram duing a play time, will keep all at bay. I do not have the nerve yet to go in to dr and say hey i need one so we can have fun during the 1 week a month. Just much easier to postpone a week. From the other posts, sounds more like the clean issue and the instilled value that it is nasty. Also it does help the cramps.... and that is when the shower comes in handy.

10-19-2002, 11:29 AM	#8 (permalink)
TNT Julie's Helper Join Date: Jul 2001 Posts: 5,003 Location: baker, fl, usa Status: couple Swing Lifestyle Name:tblonde312	We have always had sex while I was on my period, but the mess was something that we have always been real careful about. Here recently I discovered a new product, well don't know how new it really is, but it was something that I had never heard of before until I read about it on another message board. It's called Instead, and it is a little plastic cup thingy, kind of like a diaphragm, that you insert inside and it holds all the blood. IT'S GREAT! No mess at all. It's so good that no matter what kind of sexual activity you want to do, there is no mess. It definitely has taken all the worries about having sex during that time of month away for us. Teresa
	__________________ Ted and Teresa No lifetime is enough unless you live it in such a way as to make it enough.

10-22-2002, 12:09 PM	#9 (permalink)
coolwetbreeze Here to Stay Join Date: Jul 2002 Posts: 58 Location: Texas Status: female of the couple	Like teresa I have tried the product "Instead". I have never met anyone else that has ever heard of it...I came across it quite by accident one day in my Target store and tried it out. I haven't used it while having sex but I'm glad to hear that it works...that was the whole reason I wanted to try it in the first place...Ladies, if the thought of you reaching in and pulling it out with all that stored up blood will bother you then I would not recommend it for you...My daughter said No WAY!! I am lucky enough to have a man that doesn't care if Its that time or not...I don't always feel sexy during that time but it sure is nice knowing that when I do want to and sometimes I really want to( must be the hormone thing going)that he is Up for it <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="wink.gif" /> I can't say that I would want to play with a new couple while I was on it though. Even if the guy says he wouldn't mind, I would.

10-22-2002, 02:03 PM	#10 (permalink)
dave_susie2001 Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Jul 2002 Posts: 284 Location: Michigan Status: Married Couple	</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Originally posted by coolwetbreeze: <strong> I have never met anyone else that has ever heard of it...I came across it quite by accident one day in my Target store and tried it out. </strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Target is the only place we can find Instead. Susie loves to use them for her whole period weather or not we have sex. She says that it is neater and there is no odor. We have tried sex with Instead. Oral is fine. No mess, and as long as she showers after putting it in, everything is is A-OK. Intercourse on the other hand isn't as good. I can't achieve full penetration, as I hit the plastic cup ring. I'm afraid that I'll "knock it loose" and we'll have a flow problem. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="eek.gif" /> But it does work, and it's highly recommended by the Mrs.

10-23-2002, 02:30 AM	#11 (permalink)
Rednski Registered User Join Date: Oct 2002 Posts: 1 Location: SW Washington	Being an unrepentent pervert, when we were first getting together with our now poly like other two it was her time and she had been so looking forward to us and each of our mates were "off to the races" so one thing lead to another and we just used the alternative back entrance. And is something we still do from time to time whether it's that time of the month or not.

10-25-2002, 04:39 AM	#12 (permalink)
redhot_brat Spicing up our Life! Join Date: Aug 2002 Posts: 24 Location: Mankato, Mn Status: Married Couple	Just thought I'd add a quick word of warning on this new product "instead" and sex during your period also. There is a "disease" called endometriosis ---very painful to the unlucky women that have it.It is caused by endometrial tissue backing up into the body cavities instead of flowing down and out of the women as it is suppised to. This tissue then begins to grow monthly same as it would in the uterus.This causes cysts,tissue masses,and alot of pain. I don't known whether or not these two things would play any role in causing this backflowing , but as a past sufferer of endo I'd recommend looking into it further before using/doing either. The worst part of having endo is there are many treatments for it , but no real cures.As long as you still bleed (cycle monthly) you can get it back at anytime. After suffering with it for 12 yrs I finally had a full hysterecotomy done - no uterus-no endometrial tissue - no probelms! Just a thought you might wanna consider. Debra

10-25-2002, 07:40 AM	#13 (permalink)
Quin Swingers Board Addict Join Date: May 2002 Posts: 1,136 Location: Ohio Status: Single Female	Back when I had a uterus, while on my monthly flow I would turn into Super Nymphette. Thank goodness that this guy I dated for years didn't mind. I never minded the cleaning up afterwards. Can't say that would be the case today. I just thank God every day for hysterectomies and the fact that I had one in 96. Quin <img border="0" alt="[Smiley_sex]" title="" src="graemlins/smilysex.gif" />
	__________________ One thing about me is that I'm consistant in my behavior, my thoughts, and my posting. I don't sell out or change for any reason outside of my own self wanting to. What you see is what you get: today, tomorrow and every day after that.

10-25-2002, 03:57 PM	#14 (permalink)
DragonsLair Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Sep 2001 Posts: 1,020 Location: Cleveland, OH Status: Married Couple	My husband and I have had sex during my time of the month, on light days. Sometimes I feel very unattractive during this time and sex is the last thing on my mind. But other times, I want sex all the time. Luckily my man doesn't mind the mess either. Good for me. He does sometimes want to run away the week before my period, tho. I usually get really, really horny that week. <img border="0" alt="[evil]" title="" src="graemlins/devil.gif" /> But I don't think I'd ever want to be with other people during my monthly visitor. It'd be too awkward. DragonsLair He is T. I am A. <img border="0" alt="[fun]" title="" src="graemlins/fun.gif" />

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10-25-2002, 04:27 PM	#15 (permalink)
OhioCouple Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Dec 2001 Posts: 6,619 Location: Ohio Status: Married Female	</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">Originally posted by Quin: <strong>Back when I had a uterus, while on my monthly flow I would turn into Super Nymphette.</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Helvetica, sans-serif">I neglected to post on this one, as I thought I was alone in how I felt. I had a hysterectomy in '87 so it has been many years since I have had a period. But for whatever reason my sexuality peaked during that time. I was always horny as all get out and my first husband thought it too dirty and nasty. So the only alternative was the go it alone type thing. I didn't have my ovaries removed and kinda funny, when it comes around what would normally be my time of the month, I get these cravings for chocolate. I never indulge in sweets and quite frankly don't care for them. On the rare occasions that I do and the hubby sees me getting into the jar of M&M's (which are there for the grandkids) he knows that he is in for a "sweet" treat of his own that night. Lori
	__________________ Remember that human beings are complicated creatures. We like our bedtime routines but dislike routine in our bed times. - Sallie Foley, M.S.W.

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