Why do women lie about their past?

[Cpl2share]

Due to my (Mr. Cpl) upbringing and experiences as a child and young man, Mrs. Cpl did lie about her experiences. Since she was only 16 when we started dating, this was probably a good idea. She also misled me to believe that she was older than that. hard to know if she is at Tech school or high school when I am working in a different town, and she hangs out with post high school people. Be that as it may: She finally started letting things trickle out after about 10 years together. As an earlier poster stated: A woman knows what to do to preserve her ineterests. If I had known how slutty she was when we started dating, she would have been nothing more than a conquest to me. After a while, feelings did grow, and I began to love her. I was still young and possesive enough that I felt threatened any time another man looked at her. "Oh my god, she might leave me for him." After many years, two children, death in the family, and my family hating her (if she wasn't such a slut she would not have gotten pregnant out of wedlock: that's a preacher for you, double standard). Her family hating me (Mrs. Cpl's mother even tried to hook her up with another guy while we were married) we realized that this IS forever. I realized that if my family treating her like shit ( and since that didn't work me & the boys too) and her moms undermining us, did not split us up, othing and no stud muffin would or could. We are now to a point in our lives that nothing else matters. We are happy and can be completely honest and open with each other. I can say that the only time I lie to her now is at Christmas and her birthday. But then again if you knew how she snoops, you would too. I can also say that I do not beleive that she has lied to me about ANYTHING other than chrismas and birthday gifts in at least 10 years.

[havefuninsun]

Why do women lie? Well first, as long as there are no lingering issues with having sex in our past (disease, emotional scars, etc.), is it really anyone else's business?

I've lied before because I didn't want to appear easy or slutty. And believe me, my number are way low before meeting Mr. Fun (now, the numbers have doubled since meeting Mr. Fun, because of our fun! LOL). He is still amazed at the low numbers.

I have never asked him how many people he's been with. I don't think I want to know. Some men get turned on with knowing how many numbers ... he loves to hear about past experiences I've had. I don't think I'd have that same feeling.

[cubnamy1995]

I think a lot of women lie because they have to. Granted, most of us dudes in the lifestyle don't get too hung up about it, but in the vanilla world, it's a whole different ball of wax.

How many women have been called skanks or sluts back in high school because they slept with more than one guy? If your lady was not the brundt of those comments, she sure knows somebody who was. If a woman is labeled as promiscuous, she immediately loses respect from a lot of men, often including the one she loves. Men in the vanilla world don't make it easy for women. They want women to look like prostitutes, but not act like it, except with them. God forbid a woman enjoy sex as much as a man and not apologize for it.

That's what's great about this lifestyle. My lovely wife can be as big of a slut as she wants to be, without judgement, derogatory remarks or public scorn. She doesn't have to lie because she knows she's accepted as a human being.

Fuck away ladies, and God bless 'ya. If you want only one man in your life or the entire fifth fleet, more power to you!

[2BeDeviled]

(Mr BeDeviled) Unless of course a thoroughly detailed description of those "kisses" is what turns her man on!

[2BeDeviled]

(Mr BeDeviled ... Highly Embarrassed) the above post should have been after "midnight" on page two ... I'm very used to a hierachially formatted forum ... sorry for the mistake

[threes_company]

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

I remember hearing that it was a rule of 3. Women typically cut their number down by a third, while men tend to triple their number. I think most women are ashamed to admit the number of people they've had sex with.

Me personally, I don't even answer anymore, because I can't give an honest answer other than "I don't know". I stopped counting when I started swinging, and at this point I'd have a hard time sitting down and figuring out just how many there were before that.

i totally agree with your post. When i met my bf he asked me how many men i'd slept with before him and i told him 16. The problem was one nite i got drunk and during a drunken phonecall he asked me the real number and i simply replied " you dont want to know!". A few days later he kept bugging me about so i told him. The real number was 43. He then got agro at me for lying about how many people i'd slept with. Its a no win situation!!

[it'sso]

Never having been much in demand, myself, why would I look for a woman to share my life with who nobody else would want?
Never asked because I never cared.

[NotSorry]

I don't like that question when there is an agenda... The number of people I have slept with does not give you relevant information about my character. If you are asking that question and I sense that you will use the answer to judge me then I am not telling. The only situation in which that question is appropriate is one in which I feel respected no matter what my answer is.

[athenagirl]

I don't think it's anyone's business how many sex partners one has had. I think it's a question that should not be asked. Now if someone wants to volunteer that information, that's something else.
Athenagirl

[threes_company]

the older guy i'm seeing at the moment asked me this last nite and i was a bit hesitant in telling him it was pretty close to fifty. He was a bit surprised because of my age but he seemed quite accepting of it which is what i like about him. He said it was great to see a woman who embraces their sexuality and isn't afraid to let social norms get in the way of them satisfying themselves and other people. I just thought that was a really great way to look at the concept.

Then afterwards he said.. "so am your lucky half century???". To me it had a bit of a double meaning because he was close to the 50 man i've slept with and he is also 50 years old! .. i said to him "babe lets celebrate the half century!" hahaha

[ncmd_couple]

Actually, it was my wife that asked me that question. My response was, "well...." and I had to think about it and start counting on my fingers. I didn't ask her because it didn't matter to me. Still doesn't.

S

[celtic239]

We have been married for 28 years and I have steadfastly followed the "don't ask, don't tell" policy concerning her sexual escapades before we got married. I figured if I did ask she would just lie anyways.

[BiloxiCouple]

For an example. Women with an active past are considered sluts and men with an active past are considered Don Juans.

[ownerspet]

Originally Posted by duwannaball

I heard on the radio the other day that women when asked how many sexual partners they have had, usually say about 1/2 of the real number.

I'm curious if this is the case for most women in general, and if so, why lie?

I've also heard this and I can only think that it goes back to what society as a whole has done: It seems like over the years from what I've seen the social circles among many women have imposed the thought or idea that sex with multiple partners for women is a bad thing. I also realize that this is just the opposite with men, where as sex is almost viewed as a positive aspect of a guy in many male social cirlces.

As a result of the different views of individuals of different genders: Many women have had this value installed in their subconcious mind (at a minimum) from an early age, but at the same time hormones are hormones and women want to have sex just as much as men.

This misinterpreted view of sex with multiple people rarely prevents women from having sex with different people over the years, but when many women are asked, "How many partners have you had?", the view/idea/thought that "too many sexual partners is bad" would most likely hang in the head of most women in similar societies.

At the same time our society discourages lying or else some women might be inclined to go to the extreme and say "just one" or "I'm a virgin". So on top of one society imposed ideal of "women who have multiple partners are bad" (which to set the record, I don't agree with this), you also have a more deeply rooted moral dilema (don't lie) that conflicts with the sexual ideal.

As a result of the "don't lie": Most women probably won't go to the extreme, with the answer of 1 (unless it is only 2 or 3), because that's too big of a lie. However, because of the idea that society or someone has imposed in the values of many women (that multiple sexual partners for women is bad), most will still reduce the number, when answering "How many sexual partners have you had?" So it will most likely fall in the middle or about 1/2 the actual number. The lie is to be viewed as less bad, and as I implied earlier, the lie is some how not as big as it could of been, so some think the lie is justified as "it's not totally lying."

Many guys lie when answering the question now. But, I think more guys would be too macho to admit it, but if society had imposed the view on the opposite gender, we would probably be more inclined to tell the same lie. So as you can see I partly blame society. However, I don't advocate lying, but I don't agree with the sexual ideal that sex with multiple partners is some how bad. "practice makes perfect", right.