Opinions about Kissing?

[Stratecpl]

We've noticed that it seems many couples have a "No Kissing" rule. Many of the single men we've been in contact with always ask this question of us. Personally Ron and I have no problem with kissing others when we swap. In fact I love to kiss and we both feel that it's a vital part of foreplay. Really gets those juices flowing real fast for me. I'm not sure what most couples who don't kiss other partners reasons are, I'm sure very good ones and maybe many different reasons. I just know that for us personally it's ok to kiss others. When Ron and I kiss each other it's different. We both try to convey in that kiss, not just passion, but "feelings for one another as well" With others a kiss is just foreplay..nothing more. No special feelings involved Sorta like two actors kissing in a love scene in a movie only with real sexual intentions..haha. I'm curious..what are some other opinions of kissing..for and against..

Connie

So far, we've never had any problems with kissing with other couples. Like you mentioned, it's another part of foreplay with others. It's passion & love & lust between hubby & I! NOBODY can turn me on like the way HUBBY turns me on with his kisses! And his luscious lips....OMG!!! When he kisses me the way he does, I can feel my pussy swelling and the instant WET I get from his kisses! *Getting HOT just thinking about it....lol*

When we first got into the lifestyle, we said that kissing would only be between hubby & myself. Well THAT "rule" went out the door when we swung with our FIRST couple! *lol* Hey, we're flexible, and in more ways than one....

Again, it all cums down to each couples' preferences! Some couples find kissing to be intimate or sacred only between each other, and some couples don't mind and find it more erotic and enjoyable while swinging! To each's own....


Wife of CyberMWCouple

Sex without kissing? I am not sure I understand that. Is it because the face is where love is proclaimed and intimacy is at its deepest? If so, wouldn't that preclude oral sex as well? I suppose I could understand the difference between sharing your pussy with another man and sharing kisses with him if that is the reason. But why would you share oral sex and not kisses? That seems to spoil the reasoning for me.

Different strokes for different folks!

Some couples "save" kisses/oral sex/etc. only between themselves and not shared with other couples/partners. As in the choices of soft swing vs. full swap...Again it's a matter of preferences/choices.

Kissing is no exception....As long as we all except each others' preferences/choices and are non-pushy, and have an open communication between all involved, we shouldn't have any problems enjoying our sexual experiences.

I've never really thought about the "kissing" issue till now, especially since we've never had any kissing issues with the couples that we've swung with so far. We've all been very "gracious" with kisses! *lol*


*Blowin' kisses* ;-Oxxx
Wife of CyberMWCouple

[This message has been edited by CyberMWCouple (edited 01-18-2001).]

I suppose I can accept it either way so long as they don't tell me to "kiss off!"

I find it interesting that when we are with our friends on a non-swap evening the guys will always peck the other wife on the cheek to say hello or goodnight. But on the swap nights the hello kiss is much, much, more. That tells me that they understood the talk we had with them about how we didn't want them to automatically expect sex everytime we were together. The guys obviously talked and orchastrated that little peck on the cheek thing. It's a nice touch that I really appreciate!

Funny you mentioned the "hello/goodnight" kisses....I guess it's the little things that we sometimes over look every now and then....

The couples that we "see" (whether it be for sexual or non-sexual get togethers), we sometimes greet each other with hugz & kiss on the cheeks, and sometimes it's non-physical greetings too, it all depends. But the guys usually greet each other with hand shakes....

When departing each others' company, we usually end with hugz & kisses on the cheeks (females), on the cheeks or lips or both (females/males), and of course hand shakes between the guys.

And depending what couple we're with at the time before leaving, the guys may give us females a few juicey kisses, maybe gropes while hugging (usually by moi *lol*), more juicey kisses, and more.....Well, you get the point, most of time all of us just don't want to end our "date"!

It all depends on the mood at the time, the "trust" factor, and the respect we all have for each others' relationship! What we "do" with one couple, may not be right for/with another couple....Another reason why communication is very important between everyone involved, in ANY relationship!

Interesting point on the kissing subject here, AmyS....


Wife of CyberMWCouple

[JustAskJulie]

The kissing issue is like pretty much everything else that people choose or dont choose to do.. purely a personal decision. I've talked with several couples who have the no kissing or no tongue policy (they may kiss on the lips but not openmouthed). The reasoning I've heard for it is that they feel it is too intimate.

I, like you guys, don't really follow the logic there as I see kissing just as I do sex, not as a love issue but as a physical issue. But then I have different boundaries of things that I will only do with my husband. I guess each couple has to come up with what their boundaries are and for some that is "no kissing"... which to be honest is a VERY HARD rule for me to stick with, when with those couples.

Julie http://www.swingersboard.com

So far with the males that we've swung with, THEY'RE the ones that initiate the kissing with me! And VERY passionate kisses too! And I enjoy it too! But I can also go without kissing when swinging with other couples, but it just never happened yet! It's the "thought" that counts, right?! *lol*

I enjoy SEX and I enjoy KISSING, and EVERYTHING else (within MY boundaries *lol*) that goes with SEX!


Wife of CyberMWCouple

You have probably answered this question before and I just missed it, but what are your boundries? And Julie, what are the things you will only do with your husband? Forgive me if I'm asking you to be repetitive. Point me in the right direction and I can go there to read your answers.

My husband and I don't really hold anything back when we trade partners. But we only trade with our closest friends. We have known them for years. They were in our wedding. But we have done everything with them that we do together. I don't think we will open up to another couple but if we did our rules might be different. When you have been friends for a decade before you start swinging with a couple ... well... there just was no thought of holding back on anything. It all just ... happened.

Originally posted by AmyS:
You have probably answered this question before and I just missed it, but what are your boundries?

Well, I don't do anal, no strap-ons, no pain, no humiliation, no bathroom play, just to name a few, but you get the idea...

Whatever is UNcomfortable to me or both of us, that's added to my/our "boundaries list".

What's YOUR boundaries, what's UNcomfortable to you/both of you?

And THAT'S SO COOL, that you two have this "open" relationship with another couple, let alone with a couple that was in your wedding!


Wife of CyberMWCouple

BTW...I answered your email. Thanks for writing us!

[This message has been edited by CyberMWCouple (edited 01-19-2001).]

I guess I never thought about boundries. We started by talking and teasing and then actually planned out our first experience in advance. We used a hotel because of our children. We've had oral sex and intercourse with our friends. But that's pretty much what we do as a married couple anyway. I mean, we just made love with them. Pretty straight forward. I wrote the story and posted it on one of the message boards some months back but I can't remember which "strand" it was under. I'll look for it and let you know where to find it.

[Stratecpl]

Boundaries......

We're pretty easy..haha. The only things we won't do are Bi, potty games, animals, kids, S/M, and humiliation.

Will do's are anal, mild B/D, kissing, swallowing, any kind of position we can think of and then try to invent new ones.

Connie

I guess I'm just an old fashioned girl... I kiss. I suck. I swallow. I screw. And I'm going to do bi for the first time TOMORROW NIGHT. But no B/D or anything to do with blenders or car batteries.

[JustAskJulie]

Originally posted by AmyS:
You have probably answered this question before and I just missed it, but what are your boundries? And Julie, what are the things you will only do with your husband?

My sexual boundaries in general are the same ones mentioned by others - no pain, humiliation, etc. I would try some light b/d with the right people.. would have to be someone I trusted.. As far as what I will do with hubby that I won't do with others.. that is Anal. He's the only one I'll do that with.. and I dont even do it with him that often.

Julie http://www.swingersboard.com

Originally posted by AmyS:
I guess I'm just an old fashioned girl... I kiss. I suck. I swallow. I screw. And I'm going to do bi for the first time TOMORROW NIGHT. But no B/D or anything to do with blenders or car batteries.

You GO g/f (girlfriend)!!! We can't wait to hear ALL about it too! *Thumbs up @cha*

BTW....We don't do blenders or car batterires either, or anything in that sort! I guess that makes us "old fashioned" too, huh?!

Hubby & I have done the anal thing maybe once or twice, but we can do without it. I've never tried it in the position that Julie does it (lowering herself from on top, having control of the "strokes"), sounds interesting though... We've also done some light B/D, but never with anyone else. Again, it's all in that trust factor thing....

*Thumbs up @ Stratecpl for sharing their "Do's & Don'ts"....* We don't do animals or kids either! THAT'S a no-no for us too!


Wife of CyberMWCouple