How do you all feel about kissing?

[NaughtyKitten]

I'm new here and through my perusal of many threads I found that some people don't kiss their play partners (passionate, deep mouth type kissing). Is that common? For me that is a big part of my sexual fantasies. I love kissing and miss the feeling of a first kiss. I love kissing hubby but it is not the same feeling as a first kiss. That electric feeling is such a turn-on for me. How do you all feel about kissing?

---NaughtyKitten

[MrNorthIndyCpl]

NaughtyKitten,

I think the issue for many is that kissing is an extremely intimate act, a casual survey (mainly me just asking anyone I thought would be open to answering) led me to understand that sex for fun is one thing, but true or perceived intimacy of a significant other with someone else can be threatening to many people.

John

[northindycpl]

Personally, we don't kiss playmates. A playfull peck or lick here and there is fine, but we reserve the passionate stuff for each other.

I still feel the first kiss butterflies when Mr. Indy really kisses me. He does it perfectly, and I can't imagine what it would be like to not feel that with only him.

[DaveNSheila]

Hello and Welcome to the board. With us we are ok with kissing. S like you, loves to kiss. With that said. We let kissing be a part of our play with partners. For us we have little things that are special to us and us alone and we can tell how it is meant when we get together. D

[LikeMinds321]

I love kissing.

So does Mr LM.

We could not imagine enjoying sex with others if kissing wasn't a prelude.

Because we know that other couples are not comfortable with this, we state in our profile that we love kissing. This way, the people who aren't open to it won't contact us.

LM

[EvilMJ]

I definately love kissing. It sets the mood for me. I can't imagine trying to have sex with someone without kissing them first...it would just seem to strange. I can see where some might feel kissing is initmate but I am of the mind that when I am with my husband it is making love, when I am with a playmate is just sex. I keep a clear differentiation between the two.

[DBL D]

Probably one of the first things we hope the other couple likes is kissing. facelick

We can't imagine playing without doing it! Likes others have said: there are other things we know we do with each other that only we do. I guess it's nice that people have something special just between themselves but we feel that kissing is essential for a great swinging experience.

Now, if went to an on-premise (Or even off-premise) club we might think twice about it until we got to know the people but it doesn't take long to think twice sometimes.

Male D

[CandTinLorainCo]

For us like some have stated....kissing is as important as the rest of it! We both love kissing and do as much as we can.

-C

[starlinn]

I would have to agree with the indys, although this is a "kink" in the chain right now with us. I love to kiss, but those deep intimate kisses that hubby and I share, I feel are for us, and us only. Having my neck, shoulders, and other areas kissed are quite erotic for me. Pecking and light kissing is also erotic. Hubby, on the other hand feels that the kissing is a prelude to great sex, and turns him on. Here is my fear, if hubby is kissing and so in tune with another partner, he will forget about me. Being that we are new, I do not know this to be true, but it is a concern for me.

[DBL D]

Originally Posted by starlinn

...Here is my fear, if hubby is kissing and so in tune with another partner, he will forget about me. Being that we are new, I do not know this to be true, but it is a concern for me.

I see your concern and find it slightly amusing (not laughing at you- just found it funny) that you would find that kissing is the key to whether your husband "remembers" you when you are going to have oral or some other kind of penetration during your playtime. Seems like the latter is what most people are more worried about as far as "someone" remembering your status in the situation, but as time goes by you may find that you become more comfy with certain activities and the strength of your personal relationship is what will continue to define those things as okay in the future.

There surely are people out there who may say "I love how he F***ks me and he can do it without kissing me!!!" but we find those unions a bit too sterile for us.

Male D

[Rombi's Girl]

I love kissing. My partner and I rarely kiss for very long (I mean over 10 seconds), and I too miss the days of making out and kissing for an hour at a time when your relationship is new. My big thing is being turned on by kissing. It's an important first step in the seduction process.

First, let me say that he and I respect all boundries of any couples that we play with. But personaly, I find it hard to relate to the philisophy "fuck my wife/husand just don't kiss her/him". If you are "ok" with someone else having intercourse with your partner, why the artifical kissing limit?

Fine, fine. Save the special things for your partner. I respect that, I do. But the only limits that we have are:
*safe sex always
*same room unless at a house party, then it's a "no locked door" policy
*three "yes"s and one "no" still means "no"

This means if I want to swallow or not, it's up to me. This means I don't have to look over and check to make sure that the other two are using a condom. If I want to neck with the other man, and he doesn't want to with her, that's fine with us, if it's fine with them. And the 3 "yes"s rule means that no one takes one for the team.

The first house party we went to together raised an interesting point. Namely, there was a couple there that was really into us. I was very much NOT interested in the male half of the couple, so I told my partner how I felt. And I said that if there were agreeable, just the wife and my partner could play together. The other couple was OK with it, and off my partner and the wife went to play in a room. Well after about an hour or so, I went looking for my partner and encountered a locked door. Mind you I didn't want to make it a threesome, I just wanted to know that they hadn't fallen asleep, and if finished, could let others use the bed as space was kind of limited. Needless to say that very evening the "no locked doors" became a hard and fast rule with us.

My favorite "new" rule of ours is an idea that I got from reading some posts here on the board. When going to an on-sight club, my partner and I have fun together there first ensuring that I actually do have an orgasm. Because it was just way too frustrating for me to go home, well, frustrated after an evening of play without any release.

Thanks for letting me share.

Peace,
RG

[NaughtyKitten]

Originally Posted by Rombi's Girl

I love kissing. My partner and I rarely kiss for very long (I mean over 10 seconds), and I too miss the days of making out and kissing for an hour at a time when your relationship is new. My big thing is being turned on by kissing. It's an important first step in the seduction process.

Yes, yes, yes! Thank you for stating my feelings exactly!

Thanks for all the great replies from everyone! Keep them cumming.
I'm glad to know that others share my love of kisssing. I know that I am new here and my rules may change as we move on but right now this is a hot button issue for me. I understand if that is something a couple wants to keep private but I don't think it would work very well for me. Kissing gets me in the mood. Plus I don't get the tongue in my p***y is ok but not in my mouth but c**k in my mouth is fine, idea. Sex is a very intimate thing, more so to me than kissing so if we can share one why not the other?

I'll stop ranting now. I'm just glad to know I'm not the only one that wants to kiss my play partners. I would of course respect others if that is their preference. They might not get to play with me though.

---NaughtyKitten

[Dynamar]

Originally Posted by EvilMJ

I definately love kissing. It sets the mood for me. I can't imagine trying to have sex with someone without kissing them first...it would just seem to strange.

Dito to what MJ said!

[bear_and_babe]

We we first got started in the Lifestyle, I thought that we should keep kissing to just us. Then a friend, who was in the Lifestyle asked me if I was crazy! That I was going to miss out on a lot of fun if I limited myself like this. I am so glad I listened to her, because if I hadn't I would have missed out on some very good kissers! For us, kissing is the first hello, and the first step to getting to know someone. And I also don't understand how it would be ok for me to suck a guy off, but not ok to kiss him.
While we would respect a couple if they have a no kissing rule, we would have to pass on playing with them if they had that rule.

[DaveNSheila]

I posted earlier about kissing will give an example. When we went to go meet this couple for the first time and the first time we played on the way there we were setting up our rules. I asked S about kissing and she said that is very intimate and wanted to keep that between us. I stated the fact that ok you can have another mans dick in your mouth and your p*ssy but not kiss him? She saw the point and said ok. She really likes to kiss and that is what helps turn her on. I kiss and use it to help build things up and get things going. Well when we were with that couple and play started she realized real fast that it is almost impossible to get things going without kissing. It is almost natural to start kissing someone that you are going to be intimate with. Now when S and I kiss we can feel the passion that is building between us, which is no different than when we make love. I can put my c*ck in someone elses p*ssy or mouth but the feeling is alot different. The love that we share for each other is there and it is known. D