I see posts from men about how they have hurt their wives by their interest in swinging, but I would love to hear from ladies who have been there.
For the past couple of months, my husband and I have been actively talking about trying swinging, at my urging. The fantasizing has resulted in a couple of months of daily sex, and great fun.
This morning, after a sunrise bop and a couple of naps, he got ready for work--he always works on Saturdays. As is my frequent custom, I came upstairs as he was dressing and playfully asked if he would like a complimentary 20-second blowjob. He wasn't up for it, and I certainly didn't take it personally. We talked about it a bit, and I assured him I didn't mind, not one bit. He was all downtrodden-like, and said, "I'm sore, I just put talc on it..."
As he was leaving, he was still in downtrodden mode, and I said, "It's bigger than that, isn't it?" And at first he said, "I don't want to get into it now." Then, as he went out the door, he said, "I have never been able to satisfy you sexually, not ever. If I had, you wouldn't be so interested in having sex outside our marriage. I will do it if that's what it takes, though."
Wow! Obviously I need to drop this topic, but I also need to know what to say to him to heal what is a seriously big wound.