First soft-swing experience

[hotcpl4unfla]

Well, at long last my wife and I have entered into the "lifestyle" We have known this couple for about 2 years now, and we went and got a hotel room the other night. First, the two ladies put on a show, with body painting , black lights and white lingerie. What a sight that was. My wife, who has been bi-curious for a while, fingered the other girl and licked her nipples while I was sliding in and out of her. It was just a very erotic experience for us all, and the wife and I loved it so much we can't stop talking/thinking/dreaming about it! We are not hardcore swingers, so we will never "swap". But watching my wife suck on this other girl's nipples and vice versa drove me/her wild. One question for the newbies out there though: I noticed I was SO turned on by the whole experience I was ready to cum in less than 2 minutes! The other guy pounded away on his wife for a steady amount of time, since I think he was "used to" this activity (they have been with a dozen other couples). Have the newbies found the first experience to be overstimulating? Did it taper down the next time? What kind of things can I do to calm down and ease the sensitivity? Has anyone used Zoloft to help calm their nerves to last longer (I heard it can be used for that purpose)? Thanks in advance!

[J & K]

You say, "We will never full swap". That word Never will change in time or just stick to your rules which will often change as you learn. We too have said never and haved changed them nevers into doing.

Now your question for newbies. Enjoy being excited! Consider yourself lucky to get it hard for the first time around somebody. Some guys would be glad to trade you spots on them times when Jr won't play.

Maybe next time before meeting give yourself a little hand job about 2 hrs before hand. Might help---never know---lol.

[OhioCouple]

I think your experience is quite normal. A live sexual act is SO much more erotic than any porn movie could be. It is actually even more so (in my opinion) because it involves someone that you love which heightens the passion you have as a couple.

We have found that we don't reach orgasm as quickly as we did in the beginning as some of the newness has worn off. Don't get me wrong, we immensly enjoy being with others, it has just reached a different level.

Think of it as how your first sexual experience was with your first love or partner. Somehow I doubt that you were able to have a lot of endurace. (It's never been either or our experiences anyway.) Once you become more used to what to expect the endurance level builds and in both of our opinions (as my husband is actually helping and reading this thread here for a change) the orgasms become further apart but better than the initial ones ever were.


We both also agree with J&K. Never say never as we have found over time that our boundries and rules changed as we become more comfortable.

Lori and Gene

[Brit_Pair]

Our first experience was limited to the girls playing alone, followed by some own-partner same-room sex. It was during the second meeting that we experienced the sort of all-in encounter you and your wife have just enjoyed, and on that occasion, I too found myself struggling to contain my passions. I don’t think there’s anything unusual or shameful in that. Being inside the woman you love and desire while she is pleasuring / being pleasured by another attractive woman should be an immense turn-on. In fact, when I told her about my struggling, my wife said she would have been insulted if I’d maintained an image of cool composure.

However, I found as I become a little more experienced, it became easier to preserve that composure. That is, until the next new exciting element adds an additional layer of frisson!

Like you and your wife, we started out very slowly. Initially, it was solely about the opportunity for some erotic female to female activities while the men watched from the sidelines. We quickly moved into our lightweight version of foursomes, where all persons are on the bed together, the women pleasuring each other and their own partners, while the men pleasure their wives. A few toys were introduced, particularly a strap-on and a double-dildo for the women to explore with. And now we’ve reached the point where the women casually masturbate the other woman’s husband during foursomes. As the other two posts have pointed out, ”Never say never.”

I don’t think I’d advocate the use of artificial desensitisers. Try to avoid any feeling that you’re competing with the other male to last longest (if he’s got additional experience, he’s got an advantage in the short term.) If you blow, you blow. Just accept it, enjoy the sensations, and then devote yourself to watching and helping to pleasure your wife while your body renews itself for round two.