Do you ever get used to seeing your partner with someone else?

[badbaddee]

I've been in the lifestyle now for about 2 years. I have a wonderful partner that I live with and swing with. Here's my question - do you ever get used to seeing your partner with someone else? It is not my favorite part of the deal I have to say. To me, its only fair for me to allow him to be with someone else. I have to be kept busy so to speak in order for him to do this. If I am not, I have trouble with it.

[VegasLee]

Not only did I get used to it, I looked forward to it. But not only for the reasons that most would believe. (Being the typical male pervert)

Laura loves sex, she desires it and deservers nothing but the best of it. It is great seeing her get so much pleasure and excitement with people that she does when she has sex not only with me but with others.

It does not get any better then that. Even on cable T.V.

[Vespertine]

Originally Posted by VegasLee

Not only did I get used to it, I looked forward to it.

Dito

It's one of my favorite parts of swinging.

[sweetdelite]

Mr. and Mrs. Sweetdelite luv seeing each other in moments of sweet delight....yum

[good times]

Originally Posted by VegasLee

Not only did I get used to it, I looked forward to it.

Dito

We both like seeing each other having fun with others. If we didn't, I don't think we could continue to do it. As Ves said, it is one of our favorite parts of swinging.

[two4youinswva]

Originally Posted by VegasLee

Not only did I get used to it, I looked forward to it.

Ok, I'll make it a triple Dito.

I just love seeing Mrs two4you enjoy herself. She feels the same about my pleasure.

We wouldn't swing if one of us felt like we "owed" it to the other to let them participate.

[LikeMinds321]

Hello badbaddee,

Welcome to the board.

It did not bother me the first time I saw my husband enjoying sex with another woman and it still doesn't after a year.

If you are still bothered by watching your man with others, after two years of swinging, I'd suggest trying to figure out why. Have you talked to him about how you feel?

LM

[xxoticangel]

I (male) love seeing my wife enjoy herself wheather it is in the bedroom or any other amusement park. She, on the other hand, does not particularly enjoy watching me with another woman. We have done it many times but the only time she is at peace is if she has someone to play with too. This is another reason we have become almost exclusively MFM.

[NakedInSeattle]

Ditto to all before me on this issue. It's the most magical thing about swinging - seeing and hearing my lover receiving pleasure. Knowing that it's not love that she is feeling, just lust and pleasure.

[Greg & Sheryl]

We thoroughly enjoy seeing each other with other partners. But, as LikeMinds321 suggested, if you are still having a problem with this after two years, you are going to have to discuss this issue with your partner. One solution might be to play only in separate rooms.

[lonesomedove341]

I thought I would jump in here and answer or give my two cents also..

For me personaly (the female half) we have only been with one other couple. I was so busy I really didnt get to see anything.. But I heard it all... And I must say that in itself was a huge major turn on for me. Just knowing he was enjoying himself so much and that the other woman was having a good time also. I can say that it didnt bother me in the least..And am looking forwrad to it happening again...

We have had a a few threesomes with an ex-gf of mine. Although it was just soft swap for them. It was also a turn on to see and hear that.

Amy

[bear_and_babe]

Both Bear and I enjoy watching each other with another partner. So much so sometimes we get so distracted watching that we tend to forget the partner we are with! For that reason, we sometimes like separate rooms, so we can give our full attention to our partner. But it is still fun to be able to hear each other, even if we can't see each other.

[badbaddee]

thanks for the replies folks. this helps me out a lot.

[Chicup]

At first I had no desire to see Mrs. Chicup with another man. It didn't overly bother me, but I still had that vanilla streak of jealousy which of course was insecurity.

After we played a couple of times and we really became much closer because of it, I now enjoy her enjoying herself. I've even set up MFM's for her with a good friend of ours (who is part of a LS couple we play with) and get a kick out of how much fun she has. Prior to this I would have NEVER dreamed of setting up an MFM.

Once the insecurities question is answered and you realize your marriage has nothing to do with sex but is a true union between you and your spouse, and you don't have to worry about her liking someone else better (or whatever your personal insecurities are) you can really enjoy the experience.

[Pepper & Drew]

Originally Posted by bear_and_babe

Both Bear and I enjoy watching each other with another partner. So much so sometimes we get so distracted watching that we tend to forget the partner we are with! For that reason, we sometimes like separate rooms, so we can give our full attention to our partner. But it is still fun to be able to hear each other, even if we can't see each other.

I've found myself doing this and Drew has too. But, I think if we were in seperate rooms it would be even worse, because then I'd be straining to hear what was going on.

To answer the original question, I find it incredibly erotic to see Drew pleasuring another woman. Swinging wouldn't be hardly any fun at all if we didn't enjoy that, I think. Perhaps it is time to take a step back. Is it maybe because he does something with others that he doesn't do with you? Is it something else? I think there probably something more to this and you should talk to each other to figure out what it is.

Pepper