What are your rules?

[fun_pairTX]

1. Either of us can call a halt to activity, no questions asked.

2. We NEVER EVER separate for any reason.

[Alura]

In the early days, AIDS was not a threat and we were open to a wider choice.

Mrs. Alura had a horrible stalking experience by a college professor when she was a coed, which has had a profound effect on our rules. We've written about this in another thread somewhere.

Our primary rule is that we do nothing without talking about it first.

Couples only (unless we talk about it and change our minds), preferably only those who have been married a long time.

We play together but have before and might again do separate rooms. We must always be within hearing range of each other.

If one of us does not "click" with a play partner, we don't play with the couple at all. Both of us have, in the past, "taken one for the team" but won't again.

If either of us ever learned that our play-partner did not really want to be playing, we'd stop playing with that couple.

We only "make love" with each other. If intermarital sex were ever to approach "making love" on our part or theirs, we'd immediately end the friendship.

A play-couple must be interesting both physically and intellectually to both of us.

A new rule could be established at any time, should the need arise.

Mr. Alura

[shoreguy]

Never in our master bedroom.

We have sex with each other between playdates, unless we ever do 2 consecutive days. (most recent rule)

We do nothing with others that we don't do together. This doesn't leave a whole hell of a lot outside the normal 3 big NOs: kids, pets, and excrement, but it's there just in case we ever find something.

We keep each other aware of contact with others.

We've recently dropped the "no singles" from rule to "we'll think about it". We don't agree that you'd get more problems with single men than single women. You might have less to fear about physical violence from women, but we both feel that women are more likely to get clingy than men. Stalking is stalking.

[Spoomonkey]

We started with a list as long as Santa's naughty list...

No kissing - no genital contact - no playing at our house - etc...

But now we are pretty much down to the same rules as Fun_PairTX...

It was a lot of fun watching our rules goes out the window

Spoomonkey

[SluttyWife]

No exclusions. Safe sex always.
Which means latex for loving!



Slutty Wife

[sexypairca]

We have exclusionary rules like, no pain, no kids, no potty games, no cheaters (I'm fairly perceptive with this one) and no drugs.

Other than that, if it works for us its fair game. We don't have a signal and don't talk in code. If we like you, you'll know. If we want to leave we will. We aim for friends first and usually don't play on a first meet.

Our rules have changed over time, for the most part there aren't any. We've settled into what we are more comfortable with, not necessarily what we are willing to do.

Annette

[b_and_sc]

When we first started out we had a long list too...but when the first opportunity came up, the rules flew out the window!!! lol

But seriously, I think you'll find that most couples have the major rules (kids, pets, potty, pain).

b

[tazzie_n_truck]

Our rules we set up we feel are pretty fair.

1. No always means No!
2. We never swap on the first meet. We use the first meeting to give everyone a chance to get to know each other to develop a friendship, and to give everyone a chance to see if they are all comfortable with each other.
3. No kids.
4. No potty stuff. That's just nasty.
5. Don't be pushy with us. If you want to get together with us and the time you want to get together with us don't work with us, don't push us into changing our plans.
6. If you want to do something we are not into, don't push it. If we say no, we mean no.
7. Always, ALWAYS use protection, no exceptions.
8. If we get together a few times and we don't swap, it don't mean that we don't want to swap with you, it's because we are wanting to develop friendship. Remember, the best things in life are worth waiting for.

Well, that may seem like alot, but we want to totally feel comfortable with the other people we get together with.

[hotblonde47]

Ok, another question. Hubby and I started out with practically no rules (other than condoms) a year ago. We've found ourselves in a couple of situations that have prompted our introducing some rules, but still minimal.
Our #1 Rule is no swinging with married people unless both parties are aware and agree.
That one came up recently.
#2 - no going solo without discussing it with each other first. (and I know some of you don't do that anyways).
How about you guys? What rules are important to you? What situations have prompted them?

[VegasLee]

We tend to keep our rules simple.

No Drugs, No Drama and NO means NO.

With those simple rules most anything can fit into them when a rule is needed at the time.

[lcjtsd]

I agree VegasLee. Our only rule is that everyone enjoys what's going on.

[good times]

Dito what VegasLee said as those are the essentials, we also only play together and don't do singles.

[ALilOEverything]

We don't really have many rules, mostly just what Vegas Lee pointed out and add safe sex. We want things to be as natural and go with the flow as possible that we haven't set a lot of boundaries. We've focused more on figuring out what we should use as cues if one is us in uncomfortable than trying to figure out ahead of time what those problems might be. I won't really know until the situation arises. So far nothing has happened that would make us add any further boundaries.

[JettyCouple]

We have a few that we use:

• Condoms for penetration
• Both members of a couple must be interested
• No pain
• Nobody gets left out...for us, everyone plays, or nobody plays.

We also like to discuss sexual likes and dislikes (everyone has them) with potential play partners before the clothes come off. We have found that doing this helps in avoiding many uncomfortable situations and makes the whole encounter enjoyable for all.

D (Mr.)

[J&T Indiana]

We have a few:

1. Same-room only
2. No penetration or ejaculation without a condom (at least not ON "T" and especially NOT in her mouth)
3. No spanking
4. No anal
5. No male/male
6. RESPECT at all times.