Honesty about the lifestyle

[ALilOEverything]

We went out of town this last weekend to visit family several hours from us. Friday night it was insisted that my husband and I have a date night out Saturday night and they would watch our children. We got to thinking about what we wanted to do and found there was a hotel party not too far away. We didn't bring any clothes with us so we had to sneak off to get a couple outfits. All day we were so excited. We hung out all day with friends and family later on in the afternoon a friend of my inlaws asked what we were doing for the night and we mentioned we had a date night planned. She wanted specifics and I can't really lie on the spot like that so I said we were going to go out dancing. She ended up waning to come which made everyone else want to go too. We really didn't know what to do and decided it wasn't in the cards to go to the club so we would just have a fun time out with family.

We went out to a vanilla bar and we were just bored to tears. My inlaws were spending more time with their friends than us and since we had plans the next day we decided it would be better to just take off. We felt really disappointed and called it a night. The next day my sister in law told us that they were out the entire night and described a situation her and her husband got into in a hot tub. They ended up having the fun six-some we were hoping to have that night . She was really open about the whole thing while being discreet about it at the same time.

We after much talking over the last couple days we decided to talk more to my husband's sister about this. We came out about everything last night and had a great laugh. She wasn't that shocked and was really excited to have someone to talk to about the lifestyle. She said next time we're there we'll all have to go to the club together (for the dance part, not the after party)

I really wish we had just been upfront about everything on Saturday, it could have all played out a little differently. Hindsite is always 20/20 though and it's amusing how it all played out so I guess it's all good in the end. I never would have guessed they would have gotten the fun we were seeking out instead.

Does anyone else have a story where they wish they would have just been honest and up front about it from the beginning?

[bbarnsworth]

Wow. That must have been disappointing...all set up, then it doesn't happen, and you find out your SIL and BIL had the fun you wanted. Oof! Ironic to the painful level

[VegasLee]

And another has found out that:

The Truth shall set you FREE!

[JustAskJulie]

Ouch! I think I would have had to stick to "Hey it's our Date Night... we'd like to keep it just us". It does suck that they ended up having your fun, but at least it will make future trips easier.

[Newpants]

Originally Posted by ALilOEverything

I really wish we had just been upfront about everything on Saturday, it could have all played out a little differently.

Does anyone else have a story where they wish they would have just been honest and up front about it from the beginning?

So what you are saying is that you wished you would have come out and said that you found some of these people sexually desirable and wish you would have either propositioned them or at least made it known that you were open to an erotic experience??

Gosh, we have been to a lot of actual swinger parties and clubs that could have used that advice and maybe someone would have actually played there

[ALilOEverything]

You know Lee, I was thinking of you when I posted this

Originally Posted by Newpants

So what you are saying is that you wished you would have come out and said that you found some of these people sexually desirable and wish you would have either propositioned them or at least made it known that you were open to an erotic experience??

Played out differently in the way we could have gone to the club and they still would have had their great experience. Being that one was a family member I'm sure that would have put an end to any erotic fun if we were there.

[charms123]

We got an last minute invite to a graduation party last night. We already had plans for hosting at your local swingers club but the graduation was for my husband's good friend's son, so we went.

We planned to say about 2 hours as there were lots of people going that we knew. it was all last minutes as there was a death in the family of the friend.

Long story short, (yes, I am getting to the point) we said we had to leave early and EVERYONE wanted to know why and where we were going. "We have a previous obligation we just cannot get out of tonight" did not see good enough. How so I wanted to say "Well I am going out to a club tonight to get fucked by two guys and hubby is going to watch and encourage me!"

What did I say? the same old mantra, "we just have another obligation but wish we could stay here, this is much more fun than we will be having."

I envy you guys! I wish I had someone close that I could talk to about the lifestyle, someone outside the clubs and websites where we belong!

[TwoLittleBirds]

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

Ouch! I think I would have had to stick to "Hey it's our Date Night... we'd like to keep it just us". It does suck that they ended up having your fun, but at least it will make future trips easier.

Exactly.

"Maybe some other time. This is our date night, and I'm sure you wouldn't want to intrude."

[Meetussoon]

Honesty is great, but timing is key. If you had gonr the other way and openned up before you knew about the 6-sum it could have been tragic. Congrats and count yourself as lucky.

[SecretAsianMan]

I've had to "obscure" the truth a bit when talking about what I was planning on doing when friends ask if they can join me for events/parties.

If they're one of my adult-friends, I explain that it's an "adult party" and there will be swingers / polyamorists / nudity / sex going on.

One time, my date's 14 year old daughter was pouting about being left behind because mom & her date were going to a "pool party" and she wanted to go. We had to explain that it was for grown-ups only & she couldn't come along.