Have you ever played with a vanilla couple?

[Newpants]

Recently I posted a situation of ours involving some old vanilla friends (Sorry, I do not know how to reference another thread as a link) and that whole situation has got us thinking about vanillas in general and there is still some interest and communication taking place between us and the vanilla couple we discussed previously.

We have mentioned our vanilla situation with a few of our lifestyle friends and as it turns out most of our swinger friends have had encounters with vanilla couples at some point or another.

So my questions are first off have you ever had an encounter with a vanilla couple? And if so how did it come about? How did you get from point "A" to point "OH YEAH!"?

Also, were there any unique problems or challenges that present themselves in approaching a vanilla couple? Were there any problems or fallout in the aftermath?

I should point out that I am mostly interested in situations you may have had with vanilla couples and not vanilla singles. Singles are a whole other situation.

[Newpants]

Anyone? Come on, someone out there has had to have played with some vanillas at one time or another. Is there some kind of secret vanilla code out there that only a chosen few are privy to?

[ncmd_couple]

Newpants,

Many years ago, my ex-wife and I did, kinda, sorta. But back then, I had never heard of swingers.

S

[AshNFiona]

But if you have played with a couple, how can they still be "vanilla"? They have swung at least once!

[ncmd_couple]

AshNFiona,

Being "vanilla" or being a "swinger" is more than stumbling into a situation where sex and swapping was involved. Those terms refer to their state of mind really. And knowing what you were going to be involved in in advance. So, at the very most, way back then, the only thing you could have called us would be "potential swingers"

S

[LFM2]

Nope. We haven't ever played with a vanilla couple. We've all met at swinger functions.

[lardub]

Can't say as we have, have we flirted with members of vanilla couples as well as couples themself yes. Most humans flirt and watching them now is extremely humorous as the functions are fairly boring and always end the same everyone goes home wet or with heavy balls.
Have we ever ended up having sexual relations with a vanilla couple I doubt it as we tend to think of vanillas as those who would look down on you if they found out you had sex with other people in the company of your spouse while they engaged in sex with someone else. They all think of it, fantasize about it and most likely masterbate over it while their partner is asleep or out but would condem you with out a second thought if they found out.
I'm thinking that their was a time when we even would have felt that way, that we would have looked down on swingers and thought to ourselves something there is not right, its obvious they don't love each other.
Where did all that change I don't know how we got here to where we are, I have know idea why but I do know that we love each other as much if not more, have more respect for each other, and our sex life is out of this world, we can talk about anything and make sure we do....

[fun4Ds]

No, not exactly... but we have tried.

I think we tried to take Aluras approach a time or two, with just finding what we believed were the right people, to say the right thing, at the right time. We admired a few things we heard them say to others like "how do y'all feel about swinging."

Unfortunately we failed....

One vanilla couple we felt were maxing our "playdar", said to Mrsfun when she asked the other female,
"no, we don't go that far".

The next of all things, was a single female who just pulled up beside us while camping and became or camper neighbor over a three day weekend. A very independent gal our age... Mrsfun and I were finishing up a card game at the camp table and when I looked at the woman sitting next to her campfire... Mrsfun said " I know what your thinking, you should go talk to her " So I did..... I asked her if she would like to borrow a book I was reading.... and I believe, I offered firewood that first conversation.

We really had a great time that weekend all three of us around the campfires and a few boat rides. We have a new friend now, but not a playmate.

The thing is although we dont have the knack for warming other 'vanilla' people up to swinging, neither or these times ended in drama. I know its risky but we always like to try things in a different way. I can't say under the right circumstances we wouldn't do it again, but I think preparedness for rejection is best made ready for.


Fun4ds

[JustAskJulie]

Just for reference, I'm linking your original thread that you mentioned above:
Our vanilla friends not so vanilla or are we just imagining it?

To answer your question...yes I have a few times. In each case it was AFTER they knew that we were swingers and we'd talked about it and they'd expressed and interest in trying it. And in NOT one instance did it turn out anything better than awkward afterwards.

[EagerCouple]

Our first time was with a vanilla female, married but played alone. She was the mom of our son's best friend and she eventually became our best friend hanging with us almost daily, kind of like a 2nd wife. One day I was on one couch, she was on the other and wifee was in the shower or somthing. That Showtime/HBO whatever cable channel special came on that focused on swining, forget the title but it lasted for an entire season and followed a lot of mainstream media coverage of Pologomy back in 2004 or so.

She started giggling about the swinging stuff and I said boy that would be interesting but where would we find someone into the Girl/Girl thing and would want to get involved with us...parents of young children! All of the sudden this arm shot up in the air like a little schoolgirl trying to answer a question in class. She sat up like a bolt and started hopping up and down with a smile from ear to ear. Took about 1-2 months of planning and careful strategy but eventually everything fell into place and not only was it our first swing but it was my wife's first Girl/Girl on her birthday. After dinner we told her the entire story while giving her a birthday backrub all 4 hands and she could not say no after that and we have never been the same since...life changed for the better.

Nothing bad ever happened either with Ms. Vanilla...we eventually moved away and then drifted from each other due to 600 miles between us but no drama just some sadness, she became more of the triangle than just a swing buddy. Nevertheless...sweet memories....

[oc1234]

We haven't played with a vanilla couple, but we have been the vanilla couple that our swinging friends played with.

[NWAtlSwing]

Yes and the fall out was not pretty. We are not going to even try that again.

[Newpants]

Originally Posted by oc1234

We haven't played with a vanilla couple, but we have been the vanilla couple that our swinging friends played with.

Then maybe you may be able to offer some insider information then from a vanilla's point of view. How did your swinger friends get you to come over to the dark side?

[Newpants]

Originally Posted by NWAtlSwing

Yes and the fall out was not pretty. We are not going to even try that again.

You can't just say that and leave everyone hanging How did things go wrong and what were some of the lessons learned from that experience?

[oc1234]

Originally Posted by Newpants

Then maybe you may be able to offer some insider information then from a vanilla's point of view. How did your swinger friends get you to come over to the dark side?

It happened a little over 20 years ago. We and the other couple had met at a nudist resort several years before and had become very good friends.

It was very common for us to get together with them at either our house or their house. And when we got together, we usually got nude. And when we got together it was not unusual for my wife to talk mainly to him and for me to talk mainly to his wife.

On this one particular night, we were drinking a little, but none of us were drunk. We were just feeling relaxed. My wife and our male friend were sitting on the floor in our living room, and they started rubbing each other.

At the same time, the other wife and I were on the floor across the room, and I was gently massaging her. I really wasn't paying much attention to my wife and our male friend until I started hearing some moaning and other fun-type sounds coming from across the room.

I looked over and saw that my wife and friend had advanced past the massaging state and he was having intercourse with her, and she was really into it and enjoying it.

I pointed them out to my friend's wife whom I was still massaging and she seemed happy with the situation, so I started playing with her breasts and her pussy. After a while, I started rubbing my penis over her pussy and started inserting it inside. At this point I asked her if she was on the pill since I knew her husband had had a vasectomy and I had not. She said that her tubes had been tied. This was in the 80s and before HIV.

Since the floor was feeling hard, she and I went into the bedroom and continued our play. After we had finished, we went back into the living room where my wife and her playmate were still playing. When they saw the bed was free, they went into the bedroom to continue their play.

My playmate and I sat on the sofa and listened to our spouses continue to play in the bedroom. At that point, my playmate told me that her husband had wanted to have sex with my wife for years. I was glad to hear that since I had wanted to have sex with his wife, my playmate for the evening, for years too.

When we woke up the next morning, both of us asked the other if what we thought had happened had really happened. That evening was all we could talk about for the next few weeks.

What was really amazing about the evening is that my wife and I had never discussed swinging before, but we both really loved it when it happened. And neither of us had any jealousy.

Since my wife did not work at the time, and our friend worked at night and was home during the day, the two of them got together several times over the next few weeks to play. Yes, his wife, who worked during the day, was fine with the idea too, and the thought of my wife having sex with my best friend really turned me on too.

For some reason, even though we liked each other, his wife and I got together to play only a couple more times, and at those times our spouses were with us and playing too.

Our friends divorced a number of years ago, but we are still friendly with both of them. He is my best friend and we have continued to have him over to play. It started with he and my wife playing and has evolved to a mfm threesome.

Anyway, I hope this shows that with the right friends, swinging can bring people closer together.