Swinging Pros & Cons

[JustAskJulie]

If you were to make a pro/con list for swinging, what would it look like? What your pros for swinging be? And your reasons against it?

Did anyone actually make such a list before they got into swinging?

[bbarnsworth]

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

If you were to make a pro/con list for swinging, what would it look like? What your pros for swinging be? And your reasons against it?

Did anyone actually make such a list before they got into swinging?

We didn't make such a list. But, we did read other similar things.

For us, there's been no serious cons. If there's a con, it's that it's been hard at times to play what is in essence the dating game.

Pros:
* The sex after playing has a whole different energy to it that we thoroughly enjoy.
* Meeting other people in a nice, open environment.
* Lots of great in and out of bed talk for us on swinging in general.
* Lots of laughter over all sorts of swing related things.
* Having a great time during play.
* As a couple, we already had a phenomenal relationship before getting into swinging. Swinging's added another dimension of intimacy to us.
Etc.

[2inVT]

We didn't make any such lists. But this is what my lists would look like:

Pro:
Living out fantasies
Meeting new friends
Not having to hide who we really are
Learning more about our own sexuality and emotions
Trying new things
The enjoyment of seeing your husband/wife enjoying themself
Learning to deal with feelings of jealousy, insecurity, etc.
Improving communication with your husband/wife

Con:
Once you open this door, it's not easy to close it again.
Your marriage/relationship needs to be very solid before you start to swing.
You need to develop enough confidence to say no, and to hear no, without taking it personally.
Need for discretion.
You must be able to be honest with your husband/wife.
It can be hard to slide back into that vanilla personality if you are used to partying with swingers.


A lot of these pros/cons can sort of go either way.

[Chicup]

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

Did anyone actually make such a list before they got into swinging?

I'd say swinging is something you can't write the list for until AFTER you do it.

Before swinging list....

Pro - I'd like to have sex with other people.
Con - I might kill the guy having sex with my wife and end up in PMITA prison.

Its a leap of faith really, as most of the real issues don't make themselves clear until after you do it.

One con I've posted about a while ago, was that after swinging, sexual things that were real turn ons for you become normal and far less of a turn on. Your arousal point increases. Thats one you can't really figure out until you are already there.

[ratimadan]

We did not make such a list prior to our first swinging or partner swap experience where we had sexual intercourse with another couple's spouse or mate. The one thing we did discuss was what it would be like to play with another couple for sexual fun with the intention of swapping mates for the purpose of having sexual intercourse and what it would feel like for her to let another guy sink his dick in her pussy and for him what it would feel like to insert his cock in another woman's vagina and fuck her to orgasm.

After the fact, swinging has definitely improved our social as well as sexual skills. Socially we are now more open with other couples, the opposite sex as well as more adept at doing foreplay and intercourse with your partner in a vareity of ways so as to give and receive the maximum in sexual pleasure for him and her to reach orgasm and for him to hold back on ejaculation of his semen in her vagina until she has reached her orgasm.

[ncmd_couple]

Pros & Cons?

At least as swinging is concerned, there aren't any really, life is lived, so is swinging. We each address our challenges as they come along, and that includes swinging.

S

[shy_couple]

No list before jumping in but this is what is evolving.

Pros:
-Great sex with new people.
-Greater sex as a couple. Quality and quantity.
-Better communication in all aspects of our relationship.
-More confidence inouselves which improves all areas of our life.

Cons.
-Dating new people but as a couple. Difficult since we never really dated anyone but eachother and havent done that in 20 years.
-Finding time to meet everyone we would like to.