Relatives who swing

[watchem_wiggle]

After an interesting conversation with my sister during tonight's episode of Swingtown, I think she and her husband may be open to the idea of swinging. They have NO clue that we are swingers, and truthfully, I wouldn't tell them.

But I had a horrifying thought after they left: What if they do get into swinging, and join our club (New Horizons. If you swing in the NW, you know about it) and then we have this awkward situation where oops, we run into eachother....well, you can probably imagine.

So, has anyone run into this type of thing? How does one deal with relatives in the lifestyle? I really don't ever want to turn the corner at the club and see my sister bobbing up and down on some dude. Or her husband for that matter.

[JustAskJulie]

It's a lot easier to just be open about it. If you find out that they have decided to give it a try why not just tell them that you're already involved. You can help them by telling them where you've mistepped along the way and you can pre-empt any awkwardness from happening before it does.

If you all know ahead of time there's no reason you can't swing at the same club, you'll probably just want to try for different rooms.

[gatorvol64]

If I thought one of my sisters was getting ready to try swinging out, I'd come clean and talk to her. I wouldn't discourage her. Two have what appear (because you can never be sure) to be very solid marriages. One is divorced for the second time (the 2nd marriage shouldn't have happened). I like sex and that's no secret within my family. And that could explain why I get the "have you heard/tried this before" questions. However, all my sisters like sex as well. I can see any and all of them enjoying the lifestyle once they got past some of the things we were taught as children.

I wouldn't bother me to later see one of them and their husbands at a club. Sure I'd see a bit more than normal but I would be able to deal with that. If I saw them at a club and it was totally unexpected...well, same goes after the initial surprise wears off. It wouldn't take too long for the surprise to go away. They are my sisters after all and we've each given the others sex advice at one time or another.

Vol

[JustMrJ]

I agree with Julie on this one... you are probably one of the perfect couples to help guide them through some of the awkward times that new couples go through. Not in a play sense, but having like minded people you are comfortable with to talk to about different things that come up.

My wife and I were fortunate to meet some VERY nice people at our first house party and several have become playmates and a little bit friends. It's easier to talk to people in the know about the Lifestyle than to simply stumble through it. That's why you come here right?

As to the same club awkwardness, that's pretty easy too... all of you can talk ahead of time about if you're going to play, just let the other ones know where so the 'shocking visual' can be avoided. Not only that, you'd be there to 'soften the blow' of all the new sights and sounds at a club.

Good luck!

[good times]

We actually know several related people that come to the clubs regularly. Two of them are sisters, and one mother/daughter. While I can see how it might be a bit weird at first, I agree with the others, it would be best to be open with her about it.

By the way, most of the people we know that are related that swing have their own sets of rules between them. Most involve not wanting to see each other naked or having sex when they are both at the club at the same time. They tend to only use the private rooms to play.

[TropicalCpl]

I agree with the other posters - if my sisters sounded like they were going to start to try the lifestyle, I'd come clean to them and 'help' them along the way. However - I hope I NEVER run into my mother or my daughter at a club! My siblings - I can handle. Maybe someday I would be able to handle my daughter (after she has a stable relationship - right now she's not in a relationship!) in the lifestyle, but NOT my MOTHER!!

[realcplub2]

Originally Posted by TropicalCpl

I agree with the other posters - if my sisters sounded like they were going to start to try the lifestyle, I'd come clean to them and 'help' them along the way. However - I hope I NEVER run into my mother or my daughter at a club! My siblings - I can handle. Maybe someday I would be able to handle my daughter (after she has a stable relationship - right now she's not in a relationship!) in the lifestyle, but NOT my MOTHER!!

True-er words never written..

Panic at the disco, indeed.. After a very bad break up, my brother dropped a few random hints he knew about us, but never came right out with it.. and thru a purely random thing on one of the sites, I would swear my ex sister in law is on it..

Explains a lot, although in her case she never got the whole, Swinging, not cheating concept.

[talltim123]

I know a brother and his wife who ran into his sister and her boyfriend at a social. Their solution was to not attend it at the same at future socials.

[ncmd_couple]

Well, my son knows we are swingers. My two daughters don't as far as I know. My wife's daughter doesn't know. As for running into relatives at a club, it wouldn't bother us at all. Maybe we just have a much more relaxed view of things.

[herpob]

Never thought about running into relatives at a club. Could have happened I suppose but thank goodness it never did. We are open, with people who we know who are sexually active and experiment or explore and of course with other swingers, about our lifestyle but we do not discuss it with anyone else especially relatives. We keep private what is private in our lives and talking about sexual exploits with relatives is strange to us. I am talking about any relatives. Now yes of course my sisters and I talk about everything and they ask loads of questions all the time but no details about what takes place. Its more about performance assistance. We see each other naked all the time and no big deal but do not wish to walk into a room and see them sprawled out having sex with strange men or women. It is bad a enough when I have walked in on them and their husband's when visiting or vise versa. It's one of those thing - you know they do it, they are married and have kids, but you DON"T want to see it! Discussing sex and sexual issues is one thing but getting, giving, or seeing the details of it - eeuuuuuuwwwww! Simply can't imagine running into them at a club or party naked having sex (shutter) .