Playing on the first meeting

[realcplub2]

Originally Posted by iapr

IMHO the term "we don't play on the first date" is a euphemism for "we reserve the right to not fuck you if you turn out to be a smelly, dirty, obnoxious pig once we meet in person.."

No friggin true..

Now there are people that truly do have an actual policy against playing on a first or second or 15th date and their reasons and rationales are valid but I think for many that is just their way of saying that they do not want to feel obligated to have sex with someone just because they have agreed to a meeting.

Exactly..

In the end it always comes down to attraction, chemistry and comfort and none of those things are ever guarenteed untill you are there live and in person.

We have in our profile that we DO play on the first date if all are interested and yet there have been countless first (and 2nd and 3rd etc etc) dates where we have not played. And there have been times that we have played on the first date with people who have "we don't play on first date" plastered several times in big bold print all over their profile.

From the first communication with any prospective play mates we state it clearly, that while we have before, and never rule it out, we would PREFER to wait for the next "date"... We early on came up with a motto, when heading out the door for any meeting, first second or 35th..

"plan for anything, expect nothing"

Are there times when it has bit us in the ass, ABSOLUTELY.. but then there are also times when because we waited, the anticipation built and made the night even hotter..

[cvcple]

For us in our limited experience, we have played on the first meeting with some and not with others, it just depends on the situation. One couple in particular that we met at the local club, we had talked to a few different times over a month or so and finally got together with. It was better than expected and we wonder what took us so long! So as far as no play on the first date, not a rule for us.

[DecaturAreaCpl]

When we started swinging the way you met people was to go to weekly "socials" held at a local bar or hotel. The idea was to meet another couple, talk for a few minutes, then head for one or the others' home (or to a local hotel/motel.) If you didn't play, the evening was a failure. Where did the idea of courtships come from? I don't know about other people, but we don't have a lot of free time. When you are able to go out every two or three months at best, you damn well don't want to waste the night on cocktail conversation. You find out what you can by email and pics, then meet to play. If the real thing is pretty much like the advertisement, off come the clothes!.

[2inVT]

Originally Posted by DecaturAreaCpl

When we started swinging the way you met people was to go to weekly "socials" held at a local bar or hotel. The idea was to meet another couple, talk for a few minutes, then head for one or the others' home (or to a local hotel/motel.) If you didn't play, the evening was a failure. Where did the idea of courtships come from?

I see your point, Decatur. Our style isn't so much of a "courtship," really - and we have known folks who wouldn't get down to sex til you'd met them half a dozen times. That's what I'd call courtship LOL.

We're always a bit envious of the folks who do the meet and play. We've just found by trial and error that it doesn't work well for us.

We rarely play on the first meeting - but if we set up a second meeting, it's definitely to play.

[SJCPL1]

It depends on the situation