Changing Plans

[JustAskJulie]

Ok, so this last weekend we had every intention of getting to a local social here that we haven't had the chance to get to yet. With socials only happening once a month it's often hard to get our schedules to match the date that a social is scheduled for. We try to plan ahead (as in this case) but even then it doesn't always work out.

We had every intention of going Saturday night... then here's how our Saturday went down. I woke up at 5am with a splitting headache... which, of course, forced Pet to wake up within the hour and rub my back. I was out of bed and online by 8am... and at the gym by 9:30. Once I was done there I had to run to the next county over to ride some land with a colleague (which turned out to be a lot of fun)... I finally got home at like 6:30... and the social was set to start at 7pm. We rushed around still trying to make it there. Got dressed and headed to get some dinner. So we sat down at dinner, ordered a drink and enjoyed our dinner .... and by the end of it Pet now had a headache! So we headed home and after my day started so early I was litterally asleep on top of the covers by 10pm.

So, after we had gone through the trouble of putting the date/social in our Swing Lifestyle profile to let others know we'd be there. Had talked to several couples who also planned to be there that we looked forward to meeting... now I fear we look like total flakes. I'm sure we aren't the only ones this happen to... we can't be - there's always twice as many people signed up for every party than actually show up! So has this happened to you? Full of great intentions for a night only to poop out and land in bed early?

[good times]

Yea, about two weeks ago in fact. Mrs. GT had been suffering with the flu but seemed to be getting over it by mid week. So we signed up on Swing Lifestyle for one of the local clubs for Friday night. Friday night we were still debating going about an hour before the party but it seemed like I might be coming down with it and Mrs. GT was pretty tired so we decided to pass.

As you said, it happens all the time, so I don't think anyone will think much of it.

[two4youinswva]

We once had this amazing run of attending about 15 or 16 straight socials. Then, one night while on the way to the party, our babysitter called and had to leave, hanging us out to dry.

Since then, it has been hit and miss on a monthly basis. We sign up, and are usually able to make it, but sometimes, shit happens.

Many folks are in the same situation, so like GT said, most won't think anything of it.

[Thrax]

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

...Once I was done there I had to run to the next county over to ride some land with a colleague (which turned out to be a lot of fun)...

The stuck-at-14-years-old part of my brain -- a pretty big chunk of a shrinking mass -- giggled at this line. ("Ya wanna ride some land with me?")

Anyway, I've only ever missed one lifestyle event that I committed to. I made it to all the other lifestyle meetings with couples and single females, house parties, club visits, campouts, etc., but I had promised a couple I'd be at a Meet & Greet a couple of years ago, but my car broke down. It sounded like a lame excuse, but they were kind enough to accept the truth and we did meet and play later on.

One of the many knocks against single males (and what I think is a lot of married males posing as single) is the fact that a number of my cohort are prone to cancelling meetings and potential playdates. Some excuses may be legitimate, but there is the rightful suspicion that some of those guys are "playas" in cyberspace, but are too afraid to leave the parental basement and actually engage in the sexual adventures they agreed to.

And then there are the married guys posing as singles who find out that they forgot about junior's baseball game, or a PTA meeting, or their anniversary dinner, none of which they can get out of. Or they just can't leave the house because the spouse is suspicious.

So, as a single male, I have extra incentive to be where I've promised to be unless I truly can't make it. Although, to be truthful, I don't make commitments lightly.

Would I opt out of a meeting or playdate if I was so beat from some unexpected activity that I didn't think I couldn't perform in a way I thought was acceptable? Yes, I would opt out and explain why. Lifestyle people that I know already would know I'm being honest with her/them. And if a single female or couple I was unfamiliar with didn't accept my excuse, then there'd be nothing else to do but write her or them off.

Thrax
P.S. That's not to say I haven't botched some scheduled encounters I have had. But that wasn't the question, was it. Hey, I made it there, but I messed up! Sorry!

[MRSfun]

We haven't missed very many, sometimes it happens but we try to make every scedualed event. Like you say there are always more on the list than actually show up.

[Pepper & Drew]

That's why we rarely sign up. That way, if we show, it's awesome. If not, no one was expecting us.

As for breaking plans, we've only done so once. I know the couple thought we were total lame-asses, but we had an issue come up. I felt terrible, and they never contacted us again.

Pepper

[sweet_tna]

We don't sign up for any events until we have a sitter secured. And so far, we haven't missed an event/date that we made plans for--yet. Life happens, and sooner or later, it'll be our turn. Most foks (I would think) would understand and be okay with it. If they don't, they probably aren't worth your time.

=)

[Greg & Sheryl]

Once, we went to bed late one afternoon for a pre-party nap, which is normally a good idea because we no longer have to energy to stay up as late as we did when we were younger. Unfortunately, on this occasion we neglected to set our alarm clock, sowe ended up missing a party we had committed to because we overslept!