Interracial Sex, taboo or natural.

[Greg & Sheryl]

This is a topic that greatly affects us, not only because we are an interracial couple (bm/wf), but because Sheryl made a decision three years ago to play exclusively with black men. We announced that decision in this thread nearly three years ago, and it caused quite a stir!

We never find ourselves getting turned down by others because of Greg's race, but that is in part because we don't approach others unless they specifically state that they are open to all races or seeking black men. In fact, we find ourselves in high demand within the lifestyle because Greg is black. We don't know if this is because of the "taboo factor," but a lot of women in Colorado share Sheryl's preference for black men. For some, the desire is so strong that you might classify it as a fetish, but we are more bemused than offended by that.

[hamlet]

I was really surprised to see this topic come up, because I would have thought it to be a non-issue. As we've watched our kids grow up, one thing we've often remarked upon is that dating combinations (male/male; black/white; female/female, etc.) which were somewhat shocking when we were younger are barely even noticed by them. In fact, when we've seen them treat such pairings as perfectly natural, it's one of the few things that gives us hope for the future social development of humankind. Yet here we are (those of us on this board, I mean) in the lifestyle, pursuing behavior that is considered taboo by the vanilla world around us, and apparently even in our 'alternative" world, there's something less than 100% tolerance for other alternative behavior. I don't by any means intend to suggest that someone who happens to have a preference for black or white partners is a racist, any more than I'd call someone bigoted who had a preference for taller or shorter partners: our turn-ons are our turn-ons and can rarely be negotiated. But the notion that anyone might consider a black-white pairing to somehow be wrong is really surprising. Then again, perhaps that's only an additional piece of evidence (not that additional evidence is really necessary) that I'm entirely out of touch with what's going on out there.

[NumbskullsX2]

Originally Posted by Greg & Sheryl

This is a topic that greatly affects us, not only because we are an interracial couple (bm/wf), but because Sheryl made a decision three years ago to play exclusively with black men. We announced that decision in this thread nearly three years ago, and it caused quite a stir!

We never find ourselves getting turned down by others because of Greg's race, but that is in part because we don't approach others unless they specifically state that they are open to all races or seeking black men. In fact, we find ourselves in high demand within the lifestyle because Greg is black. We don't know if this is because of the "taboo factor," but a lot of women in Colorado share Sheryl's preference for black men. For some, the desire is so strong that you might classify it as a fetish, but we are more bemused than offended by that.

No demand here. You would not be welcome among around these parts, but not because of your color, because of your attitude. Your original post was very offensive to white males and white people overall but I'm sure you new that. Why did you bring this racist crap up in the first place? Why are you bringing it up again?

[VegasLee]

I am white, have been for a very long time and the post by Greg & Sheryl today and in 2005 did not offend me in any way.
Please speak for your self, don't think you can speak for all white males.

I have met them and known them for many years, I know personally they are not racist in anyway.

As I said in 2005, this is a public forum, they have every right to speak their mind just as everyone else that visits this site.

You don't have to like what they say but they have the right to say it.

[LikeMinds321]

Originally Posted by SCcpl40

What's odd, in different parts of this country being with certain ethnic groups seems to be taboo. What's your take?

Taboo?

Where have you lived that you found this to be so?

Around these parts there is no "taboo" talk goin' round. The forums on ad sites we belong to never talk about any race being a no-no. In fact, quite the opposite. Swingers openly discuss their preferences in playmates, whether it be the details of what they look like, how they like to play, what their kinks are, whether they are bikers, bowlers, or sports fans, whether they like to travel, barbeque and make "friends first" before they get down to sex, and sometimes they say they are really turned on by certain ethnic groups. No one objects to hearing any of this.

This thread has redirected itself to the same old issue of racism, and I think it's turning away from your original question...unless the purpose of your OP was to get a discussion on racism going?

LM

[Greg & Sheryl]

Originally Posted by LikeMinds321

This thread has redirected itself to the same old issue of racism, and I think it's turning away from your original question...unless the purpose of your OP was to get a discussion on racism going?

We don't personally subscribe to this theory, but there is a school of thought that believes the idea of interracial sex is arousing to many precisely because it is so taboo. This thinking is common among couples who engage in interracial cuckolding, which is a lifestyle that appears to be gaining in popularity. You wouldn't believe how often we get contacted by couples who are dying to have to have the wife play with a black man. Interracial sex is definitely a taboo fetish for them.

Unfortunately, accusations of racism always pop up whenever racial issues are discussed in any context. That's not just limited to this forum; that's just the way our society is.

[Pepper & Drew]

Originally Posted by LikeMinds321

Taboo?

Where have you lived that you found this to be so?

Around these parts there is no "taboo" talk goin' round. The forums on ad sites we belong to never talk about any race being a no-no.

LM

I'm not sure where you live, but it's certainly an oddity. I could give you some SLS handles, and I could also tell you some stories that would make your hair stand on end. Our profile now mentions that I'm not a Disney ride for that very reason. Lots of people have contacted us because of the taboo factor.

The swinging world will evolve no slower or faster than the rest of the world.


Pepper

[Spoomonkey]

It is natural...

But it also comes down to preferences. I am not attracted to certain things about some women - that could be size, intelligence and even skin color. The same is said for Mrs Spoo.

As for ethnic women, I am not particularly attracted. Why? No idea. But have I met black women that I would fall over for? Absolutely. I have even been with black women and dated one for a time. Sometimes the person overcomes the preference

Spoomonkey

[NumbskullsX2]

Originally Posted by VegasLee

I am white, have been for a very long time and the post by Greg & Sheryl today and in 2005 did not offend me in any way.
Please speak for your self, don't think you can speak for all white males.

Dude, it was offensive. If he came into our establishment and started spewing that racist shit, I would personally see him to the door mainly for his own protection. If "she" doesn't want to be with white men, fine, I could give a phlying phuck but WHY go into all her reasons for not doing it except to give him an excuse to spew his racist bullshit? That's what starts fights. (and keeps food on my table, thank you).

We all have our preferences. If you don't want to be with somebody, just say "no thanks" and leave it be. Don't say "no thanks, because your wife is old, fat, and ugly and mine is young and pretty" or "no thanks, because we're trying to avoid STD's therefor we don't f*** n*****s or people who f**k* n*****s"

Saying that somebody else said it then repeating it here doesn't make it right, either, otherwise skinheads could start repeating a bunch of stuff Hitler said about negros (none of which I believe, of course) and you couldn't call them racists because they were just repeating what Hitler said, not what they believe. (Yea, right )

Maybe that crap plays in your club vegaslee, but I can tell you it absolutly, positivley doesn't play in ours. If it did, we'd find another club.

Originally Posted by VegasLee

they have every right to speak their mind just as everyone else that visits this site. You don't have to like what they say but they have the right to say it.

So do I, and I just did.

[NumbskullsX2]

Originally Posted by SCcpl40

What's odd, in different parts of this country being with certain ethnic groups seems to be taboo. What's your take?

In Ohio, Indiana, & Kentucky it dosen't seem to matter. If people are cool, they'll make friends wherever they go and whatever their color. If theyre not, they won't.

Some people aren't cool and don't make friends, but rather than manning-up and admitting they are the problem, they blame it on the other persons color.

[tropicalmix]

In the end, it's all about attraction. If you won't play with another couple you're attracted to because of their race, you're stupid and it's no one's loss but your own. But many people are simply not attracted, for whatever reason, to certain body types, ages, races, etc. If there's no attraction, it's foolish to think of playing just to be politically correct.

[VegasLee]

NumbskullsX2,

We are going to have to agree to disagree. It offended you, it did not offend me.

Sheryl is not the first white women I have heard explain her reasons for not wanting to be with a white man and I was not offended when the other women explained their reasons either. Just how I am.

I take it as nothing more than an explanation, not being racist. That is how I am. I don't try to read more into people's words then what is there.

[NumbskullsX2]

Originally Posted by VegasLee

We are going to have to agree to disagree. It offended you, it did not offend me.

I agree, we'll disagree. If you're not offended by it, there's no good to be gained by trying to make you offended. I'm sure there are racists in this lifestyle just like any other, and it's to their credit that most of the time they don't bring it up where it's likely to cause problems with other people. Even if we don't agree with their racist views (whether their against blacks or whites) we at least ought to give them a high-five for keeping it to themselves in public.

Peace, brother

[Greg & Sheryl]

Originally Posted by NumbskullsX2

If "she" doesn't want to be with white men, fine, I could give a phlying phuck but WHY go into all her reasons for not doing it except to give him an excuse to spew his racist bullshit?

We posted our reasons because we felt it was an interesting and relevant point for discussion in this forum. The entire point of the Swingers Board is for all of us to delve into issues we face in this lifestyle. How and why we arrive at our criteria for chosing playmates, whether it involves race, age, size, beauty, education or social status, is a legitimate issue for discussion.

If you don't want to be with somebody, just say "no thanks" and leave it be. Don't say "no thanks, because your wife is old, fat, and ugly and mine is young and pretty" or "no thanks, because we're trying to avoid STD's therefor we don't f*** n*****s or people who f**k* n*****s"

We don't recall making any personal insults or racial slurs, so we don't think your examples are completely analogous to our original statement. However, your examples are actual reasons we've heard from others regarding playmate selection, but they are generally stated in a much more diplomatic fashion, so we respect those points of view. In giving our reasons, we tried to be as tactful as possible. Most of our colleagues in this forum understood and respected our tactfulness, but we suppose there will always be a percentage of people who don't "get it."

Saying that somebody else said it then repeating it here doesn't make it right, either, otherwise skinheads could start repeating a bunch of stuff Hitler said about negros (none of which I believe, of course) and you couldn't call them racists because they were just repeating what Hitler said, not what they believe. (Yea, right )

We're not quite sure how this example could be applied to this forum, but based on this and your "she" remark, our best guess is that you think Greg is using Sheryl to justify his racism. Nothing could be further from the truth. In fact, Greg disagreed with Sheryl's decision three years ago and we still occasionally debate it today. By limiting our play to black and interracial couples, not only does this greatly reduce our pool of potential playmates, but Greg misses out on playing with some genuinely outstanding ladies just because their husbands aren't the right color. This includes some wonderful friends we've made in our six years on this forum.

Greg's argument is that is okay to have a preference for black men and to seek them out accordingly, but it is wrong to disregard a potentially outstanding lover just because of the color of his skin. Unfortunately, Sheryl doesn't see it that way. Her decision was based on years of personal experience in the lifestyle, and she's not budging from it. If you have any doubts about this, you can ask VegasLee, because we have had this conversation with him.

Maybe that crap plays in your club vegaslee, but I can tell you it absolutly, positivley doesn't play in ours. If it did, we'd find another club.

Provided there is a decent pool of black men for Sheryl to choose from, there is little doubt that we would have fun at your club. When we go to a club, we go there to play rather than discuss our motives, so this issue wouldn't even come up. If you honestly think our reasoning is flawed, simply say so and state why. Personal attacks and name-calling don't do anything but make the Swingers Board a less enjoyable place to be.

[NumbskullsX2]

Originally Posted by Greg & Sheryl

Unfortunately, accusations of racism always pop up whenever racial issues are discussed in any context. That's not just limited to this forum; that's just the way our society is.

Greg, I just agreed to disagree with the other guy. Now I'm gonna disagree with you.

I don't think "accusations of racism pop up whenever racial issues are discussed in any context" I think they pop up when YOU mention them, and it's because of the way you mention them. If you look back at every response to this thread, everybody who has resonded (so far at least) has said either that race is no big deal, or that it's not their preference but that they don't have a problem with people of other races in the lifestyle. Then you come along and say stuff like "This is a topic that greatly affects us because Sheryl made a decision to play exclusively with black men."

Even that guy I agreed not to agree with, we do agree on one thing - that race doesn't matter to us. So why does to matter so much to YOU, and how can WE possibly fix YOUR problem with white people?

One thing I tell new people in this lifestyle is that if they want to enjoy it and not have problems in clubs or socials, they need to check their attitudes at the door. They don't like tatts or BBW's? Leave it at the door, I say. Don't like older couples, younger couples, or single people? Leave it at the door. Be nice. Don't like black people or white people? Leave it at the door, I tell them, they can pick up their racist bullshit on the way out. Don't worry, nobody else will take it because nobody else wants it.

MOst of the people in here, it seems like that what they do. But YOU man, YOU wear it right there on your sleeve! No, right on your chest, for everybody to see. (I've seen your website dude!) For the benefit of those who haven't seen it, maybe you ought to make little name tags that say, "Hello, I'm Sheryl, and I hate ALL white men because they can't keep it up" and "Hello, I'm Greg, Sheryls husband, and I also have a bone to pick with white men (but I'm not telling you what it is)" It wouldn;t make you any friends, but it wold be a good way of stirring up shit, which is obviously what you intended to do.

Whatever problem YOUR having with "racism" in this lifestyle, I have a feeling your having every where else you go.