swingers wedding vow ideas

[sigh35]

Okay, I read all the archived threads I could about this, but didn't find my answer. If you could write your own vows as a swinger, what impportant lines would you include that allow for the swinging lifestyle without seeming too obvious? Also, what swinger destination would you reccomend most for a honeymoon?

[Tybee Swing]

Interesting questions! My husband and I weren't swingers when we got married, but we had different ideas about vows and about our definitions of marriage when we were married less than four years ago. When we married, we'd each already been through a longterm marriage and a divorce in our pasts. The innocent notions that are in most wedding vows didn't seem to fit for us, so we wrote our own. We did focus on our love and commitment to each other.

Since a wedding isn't about swinging but rather on the commitment only the two of you are making to each other, why not focus on that? You don't have to have traditional vows. You don't have to say "keep thee only unto thyself as long as you both shall live", or anything else alluding to sex or sexual fidelity. These days, anything goes with vows. Write your own.

"Also, what swinger destination would you reccomend most for a honeymoon?"

Personally, something like a honeymoon would be only for the two of us, a time for bonding as a couple. We feel the same way about our wedding anniversary. Swinging has it's place, but our honeymoon and anniversary are not the time and place for that.

If you feel differently, there are lots of resorts that are swinger-friendly.

[sigh35]

I agree mostly...I was just looking for alternative ideas as we have been together for a while and already have kids. We will have to save up for at least 3 years for our honeymoon anyways, so in a realistic view, it may be our only vacation ever or for a long time so I was just thinking we could combine special alone time with an experience to remember.

[havefuninsun]

We got married this summer and wrote our own ... like Tybee said, too, we were both married and divorced, so our vows didn't say anything about forsaking others (the thought is funny -- LOL), and they made us feel like we weren't losing our identities by getting married.

We got married in Key West, spent four days there and then went to New Orleans for a few days. I collected a LOT of beads in NO; KW was by far a great place to go. Although we didn't include any swinging, we had fun talking to a lot of people who had fun, carefree attitudes.

Oh. Kids didn't come. In fact, kids had no idea we were gonna get married when we were on vacation.

[Tybee Swing]

Originally Posted by sigh35

I agree mostly...I was just looking for alternative ideas as we have been together for a while and already have kids.

Are you a blended family, with your kids being from your past relationship? That was the case with us, and we worked that into our vows. Were you planning on having the kids be a part of the ceremony? The more we know, the more ideas we might be able to share.

[sigh35]

He has 2, I have 2 and we have 1 together. There's no big hurry on anything, but if we do it, I want an actual honeymoon vacation. Not sure if we will have the kids there or not, but I know my teen boys have no interest in being a part of the vows. Not cuz they don't like him, but they just aren't emotionally attached to him.

[WesternSwing]

I've always chuckled to myself about this subject when I get in a discussion regarding swinging and "didn't you listen to your marriage vows? To be faithful and not forsake your spouse?!"

Umm... Yeah.

Faithful:
- adjective
1. strict or thorough in the performance of duty: a faithful worker.
2. true to one's word, promises, vows, etc.
3. steady in allegiance or affection; loyal; constant: faithful friends.
4. reliable, trusted, or believed.
5. adhering or true to fact, a standard, or an original; accurate: a faithful account; a faithful copy.

Forsake:
–verb (used with object), -sook, -sak·en, -sak·ing.
1. to quit or leave entirely; abandon; desert
2. to give up or renounce

I don't see how swinging plays into either of those. We are faithful to each other since we are true to our word and promises to each other. There is no deception going on between us, just honesty, affection, loyalty, and we are "faithful friends". To be unfaithful means to deceive someone, to back stab them, to be disloyal and perfidious; none of which we are.

We by no means forsake each other since that would mean to abandon or desert each other. We have no intentions of ever doing that.

So I think you're safe still using those or related words in your vows. Websters says so, at least.

Mr. WS