Lifestyle Quirks

[cubnamy1995]

Since we've been doing this, we have noticed some pretty funny things about our hobby. Never before have we gone about getting laid in a task-oriented fashion before. Hearing us talk about profiles almost sounds like we are in a marketing meeting or something. This prospect is more within our age range, but this one has a hot tub...

I also now have three different ringtones on my cell phone, one for work, one for lifestyle friends, and one for everyone else.

It is also funny like we are in some kind of secret society or something. It's like we joined the Masons or something.

What little quirks about the nature of the lifestyle do you find amusing?

[GoNatural]

Just the other day I was thinking about how the choice to meet or have sex with someone in the lifestyle is highly based on logic. What I mean by logic is that we base our choices on certain criteria. That is generally the first filter in the process, then personality and physical attraction are considered.

In the typical singles dating scene, relationships spring up for all sorts of reasons, and logic is often overlooked.

What quirks do I have?

Well, I'm sick of reading "We are not Ken and Barbie", among other overly used lines. I've seen some profiles that are filled with these cleches. I'm sick of them, but oddly enough I can't think of any others at the moment. There are one or two more cleches that I often see on these Ken and Barbie type profiles. Those lines are a turn-off for me.

Step out and write something original for once! Show that you have some depth of personality.

[fun4Ds]

we belong to the groups and clubs that fit our comfort. we have our reasons for joining (we like to explore new places in hopes of finding compatible people)

but we have found that some places, we see so many people that are all about the (social status) of the lifestyle.

[ShellyM]

Originally Posted by cubnamy1995

Since we've been doing this, we have noticed some pretty funny things about our hobby. Never before have we gone about getting laid in a task-oriented fashion before. Hearing us talk about profiles almost sounds like we are in a marketing meeting or something. This prospect is more within our age range, but this one has a hot tub...

I also now have three different ringtones on my cell phone, one for work, one for lifestyle friends, and one for everyone else.

It is also funny like we are in some kind of secret society or something. It's like we joined the Masons or something.

What little quirks about the nature of the lifestyle do you find amusing?

The acronyms lol...its like I'm back in the Army.
And the fact that I do NOT fit into any of them lol.
HWP: Nope, not me
BBW: Not that, either
What am I then? In between I suppose

Yeah, we've joined the Templars.

[intuition897]

Not sure if it's what you mean, but we've just looked at life a little differently since we started swinging, and I think it's the effort involved in trying to hide the bright red cape under the Clark Kent disguise that really underlines our differences. We're not superheroes. I just mean that swingers tend to lead pretty extraordinary lives, and we put on the Clark Kent disguise to blend in, to make those around us more comfortable, so they wouldn't be discomfited by something that - really - there's no need to get their panties in a knot over. But knowing people as we do, we know that they'd freak out about it. So we watch how friendly we allow ourselves to get, we watch what we say, and for the love of God, we watch how much we drink at parties. We notice other couples who drop words like "playdar" and "vanilla" and who are almost unnaturally synchronized in their behaviour. We watch for anklets, belly button rings, tanned skin, good manicures, good hair, unusual license plates, Mars and Venus-type jewelry, or anything else that would lead us to believe that they were on a first-name basis with their waxing technician.

I love the lifestyle. It's like being two kids and world is our candy store.

[JustAskJulie]

Just stumbled upon this thread while looking for something completely unrelated and thought it was quite funny. The mention of marketing is so true. It does feel like we are marketing ourselves and really we are... it's all about making ourselves appealing to those we want to appeal to (and not to the rest...lol).

Then add to that the sneaking around aspects and the whole new language that goes with it and it does kinda feel like we've joined our own little cult.

[knb2004]

Not sure if it counts as a quirk... well, I guess it does.

Looking over either our IM friends list and/or cell phone contacts and/or a random napkin with names and phone numbers on it.

Honey, any idea who this is? Ummm, no. Shoot, how about this one? I dunno, from that party at the beach? Ummm, who are all these people.

Also, for the ones who you DO remember they're all listed as couples. Joe & Jane, Bill & Sue, Rick & Betty. And that's how we refer to them, too. I didn't speak to "Rick", I spoke with "Rick & Betty".

As I opined in another thread, we're strange lol.

Mr. Knb2004

[sweet_tna]

We've run into several friends with the same names, so we have begun referring to them as a couple or as a combo of their first name and sls name--like "Bob & Bambi", or "hot4u Bob"*

*These names are completely fictional. They are figures of the author's imagination and do not knowingly resemble any real persons. Any resemblance to a real person or persons, is purely coincidental*

=)

[JustAskJulie]

Originally Posted by knb2004

Also, for the ones who you DO remember they're all listed as couples. Joe & Jane, Bill & Sue, Rick & Betty. And that's how we refer to them, too. I didn't speak to "Rick", I spoke with "Rick & Betty".

And you never seem to have the last name.

[havefuninsun]

Not only have we referred to people by "Rick and Betty," we also do initials -- "hey honey, have you heard from P&P lately or N&R?" I think this comes from how most of us sign emails until we feel more comfortable with "Rick and Betty."

[lustylearning]

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

And you never seem to have the last name.

And when you go to dinner, and the hostess asks you for the name of the other couple, you feel really dumb cuz you have no clue, so you have to play the seek n find game

[prettylady]

I was sitting in Tim's with Dog one day and we were talking about board stuff when I mentioned "Spoo's" comment. I thought we must sound like morons sitting here talking about The Spoo's, justaskJulie, fun4D's, sweet tna. If anyone was nosey enough to listen they would be baffled by the names.
I also find it strange that the people I open up with the most to, I have no idea what their real names are.
One other thing is, we were out last night with a vanilla friend,(damn I wish he wasn't a vanilla friend) and the fact that I was checking out the guys and commenting as well as some of Dogs comments about women, I think our friend was a bit shocked.
Your friend,
Prettylady

Tim's means Tim Hortons. Here in Canada we just say Tim's and everyone knows what you are talking about.

[sweet_tna]

Originally Posted by prettylady

I was sitting in Tim's with Dog one day and we were talking about board stuff when I mentioned "Spoo's" comment. I thought we must sound like morons sitting here talking about The Spoo's, justaskJulie, fun4D's, sweet tna. If anyone was nosey enough to listen they would be baffled by the names.
I also find it strange that the people I open up with the most to, I have no idea what their real names are.

Same here, and feel free to talk about me anytime . . .

=)

[socolais]

On the other side of quirkiness, I find it very comforting to observe that swingers as a group tend to be much more considerate and thoughtful of others than the general population. I guess the swinger's initiation (as a couple) forms a filter where the less selfish folks pass through more easily.

I have to agree with the comments about folks being logically task oriented and I think that's consistent with the distribution of personality types in the lifestyle. I sometimes find myself being more task oriented in the playroom than I would prefer....

[good times]

We have the same problem, and have had all of the experiences the other posters have listed. The most awkward one for us though, is when we are out and about town with one of our swingers friends, and a vanilla friend happens across us and the time comes for introductions. About that time it usually dawns on us that even though we know our swinger friends real well, we hardly ever know their last name. This is usually very apparent, because in the vanilla world it is customary to introduce someone using both their first and last names. We usually try to avoid embarrassment by introducing our vanilla friends first while hoping our swinger friends are quick enough to jump in and introduce themselves.