Ok, Guys your thoughts on Gang Bangs

[tncinmd]

Originally Posted by hilltop

tncinmd,

Nicely said. Really good post.

Once in a while, the old folks get it right .

[tncinmd]

Originally Posted by TNT

I have every intention of doing so one day...but damn, with our schedule and the schedule of the men I would want to be there, finding a time that is good for everyone is very hard.

Oh well....all good things come to those who wait.


Teresa

Yes, that is the biggest problem, otherwise we'd have already done a big one. Gotta get them to add a couple more days to the weekend .

[Chicup]

Originally Posted by tncinmd

What you've failed to explain is, if all are using protection, how being with a woman in a gangbang as the 15th guy is any different from being her 15th partner in an mfm or one-on-one. If her having multiple partners is your concern, it should be a concern whether it's the result of a gangbang or multiple encounters.

I'll tackle this one, in fact I already did in my post.

The difference would be in how selective you are. When we look for couples we are very selective. We filter out those who we think are into risky behavior as best we can. We take the time for at least a conversation before we get naked. I'm sure its not perfect, but it helps.

Now lets say you had a gang bang with the guys from the 15 couples you 'screened' prior. You are correct that there would be no difference, but I rather doubt anyone has too many pre-gangbang-interviews. You find a bunch of guys online, in a club and hope it works out. The only criteria will be 'has a penis that works'. As such a gangbang will increase the chance of STD's if nothing else.

We all have levels of risks we are willing to take in the lifestyle. We like to limit them as best we can. We can’t eliminate it of course, but for us it means having/partaking in a gangbang is out, and we wouldn’t be comfortable with a woman who makes a habit of them.

This is in itself not a moral judgement at all. From a moral stand point 15 is 15 for whatever that is worth. Just a safety standpoint.

[tncinmd]

Originally Posted by Chicup

I'll tackle this one, in fact I already did in my post.

The difference would be in how selective you are. When we look for couples we are very selective. We filter out those who we think are into risky behavior as best we can. We take the time for at least a conversation before we get naked. I'm sure its not perfect, but it helps.

Now lets say you had a gang bang with the guys from the 15 couples you 'screened' prior. You are correct that there would be no difference, but I rather doubt anyone has too many pre-gangbang-interviews. You find a bunch of guys online, in a club and hope it works out. The only criteria will be 'has a penis that works'. As such a gangbang will increase the chance of STD's if nothing else.

We all have levels of risks we are willing to take in the lifestyle. We like to limit them as best we can. We can’t eliminate it of course, but for us it means having/partaking in a gangbang is out, and we wouldn’t be comfortable with a woman who makes a habit of them.

This is in itself not a moral judgement at all. From a moral stand point 15 is 15 for whatever that is worth. Just a safety standpoint.

Not trying to convince anyone to do anything or to play with anyone they don't want to. Not our mission in life.

Whatever your comfort level is is fine by us. We don't go to clubs simply because that is not within our comfort level. We prefer making friends one at a time, be it couples or singles. We don't think you're crazy if you choose the club scene.

For her to do multiple partner, for us at least, she has to know and like the guys and have been with them before. They're as interested as I am in her having a good time. Again, this is us. Others have different comfort levels. We don't judge others' appoach, but we'll only do what is comfortable for us.

[JnCC]

Originally Posted by Greg & Sheryl

For the record, the living quarters and datability of those who choose to participate in gangbangs are not factors in our feelings about that activity.

No, but the color of their skin IS...

Some Thoughts About Swinging and Race

[JnCC]

Originally Posted by tncinmd

As far as being upset about your "trailer park", etc remarks, I think they were dumb and unkind, but not personally upsetting. If you are serious and stick to the actual questions and points, you get more reasonable results, hopefully, a frank and spirited discussion of the issues.

Probably not. There are certain people who react to me, personally, far more than they do to the ideas I put forth. Even if I were to post "Have a nice day!" and blow rose petals up their asses they'd find some way to initiate an attack upon me. You don't have to go any farther back than this very thread to see who the individuals are, or the pattern to their responses.

It doesn't bother me anymore. It's actually kind of amusing in it's predictability. I have a neighbor who's much the same way...a former community board member who's always the first, and longest-winded, to make a speech at the annual block party or city council meeting. "Bullhorn Bob" we call him. He's a man of many words but very few original thoughts, none of which are of any consequence. His kids are total 'tards and his wife has a better job than he does, but you'd never know that by how he comes alive when he's behind his little 9-volt, voice-activated bullhorn!

As for the comment about "not living in a trailer park"...It was a figure of speech, nothing more. Nowhere did I say that people who lived in trailer parks were "bad," only that there is a common perception of the behaviors of people who live in them that I do not wish to be affiliated with. I am not responsible for that perception. If anybody has a problem with that, let them take it up with Jeff Foxworthy, Bill Engvall, Roseanne Barr, Bob & Tom, Brett Butler, Drew Carey, or any of literally hundreds of comics and showbusiness personalities who have contributed to that misconception. I'll deal with the comments about people living in Kentucky (many of which are unfortunately true, BTW) myself.

Originally Posted by tncinmd

I've seen here references to 15, 20, 30 strangers, which surprises me. Most (I did not say all) "swingers" who've been in the "lifestyle" for an extended period of time would have accumulated way more partners than that.

Sheer numbers of partners don't concern me as much as do the circumstances of the encounters and the likely sexual histories of the participants. (Remember, the woman in question was believed to be a prostitute)

My experience as a "swinger" may be atypical, but in the 7 years we were in the lifestyle, we were with less than 20 different couples in total. I don't recall ever being with more than 2 in one evening, and that was when we were still involved in the club scene. I now know single guys who are "successfully" dating 4-5 new women each month.

Unfortunately, I'm not one of them.

Don't get into the "it has it's own name" thing. Believe me, you don't want to go there. I've seen arguemnts break out over whether it's a GB if it's less than X number of men, whether you know them or not, whether it's one at a time ("standing in line") or several at once, etc. You see, there are no end of people who want to be the arbiters of what a particular activity is.

My response was based on the definition put forth in the "Dictionary of American Slang" by Robert Burchfield, PhD.

"gang bang 1 n phr An occasion when several males do the sex act serially with one woman; a train"

Also by the gang bangs I've witnessed, in which the women appeared not to have any personal relationship with or knowledge of the males involved.

Originally Posted by Spoomonkey

I've never genralized and ridiculed and entire group of people simply because I didn't like what they did.

And - when you learn to spell "Quayle" maybe we can have an intelligent debate

Not likely. Even if I learned how to spell "Quayle" there's no assurance you'd learn how to spell "generalized" or know the difference between "and" and "an"...

Originally Posted by hilltop

This will be my last regarding your poor social behavior but I wanted to say these things because: I used to be just like you.

That was before you moved downwind from all that volcano gas, I presume?

[XMonkey]

Just because a couple organises a ganbang for the lady doesn't mean that they do so indiscriminately - we have organised 4 'friends' for Thursday night, so that, including myself, there'll be five guys and my lovely lady. And all will treat her with respect, or leave! And she'll enjoy every moment!

And if you wouldn't enjoy the scenario, don't do it, but don't reserve the right to judge us.

PS - We're a bit far for the majority of you, that's why no invite

[CA91709]

Originally Posted by JnCC

That was before you moved downwind from all that volcano gas, I presume?

Mr. CA is reponsible for this post...
JnCC, in my opinion, you're cluttering some good points on the issue with attacks on individual posters. Isn't a `swing' life style supposed to involve the word `tolerance'? This doesn't mean that one HAS to do something they don't want to. I VERY seriously doubt that you and I will ever meet personally while standing together in a `GB line' somewhere, but that's OUR choice.

Let others make their own choices. Grant us the Strength NOT to get involved in something that may be unsafe and the Wisdom to keep our opinions to ourselves and our significant others.

[JnCC]

Originally Posted by CA91709

JnCC, in my opinion, you're cluttering some good points on the issue with attacks on individual posters.

Re-run the tape...I wasn't the first one who came off the bench in this melee. The topic was "OK, Guys your thoughts on Gang Bangs," NOT "OK Guys, Your Thoughts on JnCC" Unfortunately, phrases like "ignorant," "predjudiced," "brainless," and drawing inferences from my deliberately vague profile lead us into personal conflict and away from the topic.

Isn't a `swing' life style supposed to involve the word `tolerance'? This doesn't mean that one HAS to do something they don't want to.

That's been my point from the beginning, and one that gets lost when people want to use this board to make personal attacks or "join the herd."

Come to think of it, that's the perfect word for it..."herd"

It rhymes with "turd"...heh-heh-heh-heh

Grant us the Strength NOT to get involved in something that may be unsafe and the Wisdom to keep our opinions to ourselves and our significant others.

This is an internet forum, not a lifestyle social. It ought to be OK to express different opinions here, maybe even rib each other occasionally about our differing viewpoints. Some people just don't seem to understand that.

Coud we just get back to the subject now, PLEASE?

[Mr.Hyde69]

All I can say is those who attempt to engage in repartee with JnCC end up on the short bus of the stick. I do genuinely appreciate an adept quipster.
Props G

Now...

Swinging and tolerance are two different creatures. The ave. swingers views on male/male sexuality and single males are glaring examples of where intolerance is a widely sanctioned and practiced among the typical swinger populous.
The only thing that tolerance is a integral part of is... well, tolerance. It stands alone as a pricipal/virtue.

Opinions are like assholes.Everybody has one. And sometimes assholes have opinions. (That was not directed at anyone, I just like saying that.It tickles me.) But back to opinions...

How many people here have actually witnessed a true gangbang 15+ up close in person?
How many of you have argued an opinion in regard to them?

For those of you who have never witnessed one of these in the flesh, let me tell you... I have personally had the displeasure of seeing three 12+'rs in a swingclub environment and a handful of vanilla trains back in the day and they were all a far cry from the fantasy concept that most people cook up in their minds concerning this activity. It's more like a sad receptacle for some kind of depersonalized sexual fastfood drive through at McGloryHoles.

For starters... How many of you know 10 people in real life that you actually have real genuine chemistry with? Most of us would be lucky if we could claim 5. The fact is that these people are not doing this because they are actually really personally connecting with these people. What does it say about someone who will just let anything with a pulse and willing stick their stuff in them?
Most people who are okay with that level of indiscrimination are usually paid for this kind of actvity. My point is that a handful of guys in realife is one thing. The entire staff of Denny's is another.

Hyde

[Chicup]

I, personally have no problem with a woman wanting a gangbang. I could understand the fantasy aspect of it, and if someone thinks its worth the risk, thats up to them totally. Its their body as they say, its up to the men to do it, and any risk is 100% their problem. My only concern would be from an overall risk stand point to others who might become involved in her 1-1. I feel we are kinda pushing it as it is with swinging, so we don't play with or in gangbangs to lower the risk a tad.

Its not why WE got into swinging but if it works for others thats fine as all parties are in agreement. There are a lot of things we have no desire to do, some of which even gross us out (snowballing ) but seems to turn on others.

[curious24]

Originally Posted by JnCC

You seem to be contradicting yourself. Are you saying that you HAVE been in a GB, or are you "making opinions [you] just don't know anything about?

oops you caught me there. doh! I'm making opinions about something based not on GBs but other things in general and from what I know and read about GBs. IMO I just think that everyone is different and free to have their own opinion but if it differs from someone else that doesn't make it wrong. Although most of the time I apparently don't know what I'm talking about lol

[Greg & Sheryl]

Originally Posted by JnCC

No, but the color of their skin IS...

Some Thoughts About Swinging and Race

Trying to blend two completely unrelated issues purely for the sake of trying to take a shot at us is a stretch even by your standards, but the ironic thing about this is that you did us a favor. That thread had been inactive for quite a while, but your link led to three new posts on that issue. Each one of those posts was very tactful in dealing with a controversial subject, so even though we didn't necessarily agree with the posts, we truly enjoyed reading them. Unfortunately, tact is a concept with which you seem to be utterly unfamiliar.

[tncinmd]

Originally Posted by JnCC

Sheer numbers of partners don't concern me as much as do the circumstances of the encounters and the likely sexual histories of the participants. (Remember, the woman in question was believed to be a prostitute)

My experience as a "swinger" may be atypical, but in the 7 years we were in the lifestyle, we were with less than 20 different couples in total. I don't recall ever being with more than 2 in one evening, and that was when we were still involved in the club scene. I now know single guys who are "successfully" dating 4-5 new women each month.

Unfortunately, I'm not one of them.

Ok, that reference, "believed to a prostitute", isn't in the original quote in this thread, so I wasn't aware of that wrinkle. If it was in a club setting, then I'm really surprised. Unless it was in Nevada, where prostitution is legal, it seems to me they'd have been hustled out the door. From friends who frequent swing clubs, we've heard that that kind of legal trouble isn't looked on favorably by management and would pretty much lead to mass exodus by the paying customers. If it was a roleplay thing where everyone was in on it, that's another thing entirely.

Don't have direct experience with the club scene, but at house and hotel parties we've attended, where we already know the couples and singles, we've been with more than 2 on many occasions.

Good luck with joining the "4 or 5 a month" club.

Originally Posted by JnCC

My response was based on the definition put forth in the "Dictionary of American Slang" by Robert Burchfield, PhD.

"gang bang 1 n phr An occasion when several males do the sex act serially with one woman; a train"

Also by the gang bangs I've witnessed, in which the women appeared not to have any personal relationship with or knowledge of the males involved.

Like I said, dictionary definitions not withstanding, you'll get arguements. We were told on one forum that her (3 guys) experience wasn't one because there weren't enough guys and she knew them all. Maybe they ought to start an international governing body.

[tncinmd]

Originally Posted by Mr.Hyde69

How many people here have actually witnessed a true gangbang 15+ up close in person?
How many of you have argued an opinion in regard to them?

For those of you who have never witnessed one of these in the flesh, let me tell you... I have personally had the displeasure of seeing three 12+'rs in a swingclub environment and a handful of vanilla trains back in the day and they were all a far cry from the fantasy concept that most people cook up in their minds concerning this activity. It's more like a sad receptacle for some kind of depersonalized sexual fastfood drive through at McGloryHoles.

For starters... How many of you know 10 people in real life that you actually have real genuine chemistry with? Most of us would be lucky if we could claim 5. The fact is that these people are not doing this because they are actually really personally connecting with these people. What does it say about someone who will just let anything with a pulse and willing stick their stuff in them?
Most people who are okay with that level of indiscrimination are usually paid for this kind of actvity. My point is that a handful of guys in realife is one thing. The entire staff of Denny's is another.

Hyde

"True gangbang" ? You should apply for as position on that international governing body I suggested in my post to JNCC.

You might also consider in your doubts about whether one can have chemistry with 10 or more people, that there are a whole lot of people out there who sincerely doubt you can have chemistry with more than a lifelong partner. That is, they look upon any kind of "swinging" as a sexually depersonalized experience.

"Back in the day", there was a different attitude, if you mean pre-HIV. Everything could be cured with a shot of penicillin, the birth control pill liberated many of women's concerns and we had just invented sex. Oh, and drugs were a spiritual experience. A lot of things happened then which would be rarer now.