Ok, Guys your thoughts on Gang Bangs

[midnight hour]

Originally Posted by JnCC

So I guess this means I won't be hearing from you when you and the Mr are looking for that "Special 16th" for your next GB?

Boy you sure don't read thru the posts do ya..you just assume and assume..ahh..love that...can't get a nicer guy then that..
I bet you are one of the swaggers...
I would say you would never have to worry about hearing from me for being the first one...

midnight hour

[JnCC]

Originally Posted by Spoomonkey

Easy...

I've never genralized and ridiculed and entire group of people simply because I didn't like what they did.

Spoomonkey

They've been waiting for you over on the "Married Men Who Cheat" message board.

No, wait...it was the "Wife Beaters" message board.

Or was it the "We're Child Molesters, What's it to Ya?" message board?

Seriously...your response was priceless!

You're not related to Dan Quale, are you?

[JnCC]

Originally Posted by midnight hour

I would say you would never have to worry about hearing from me for being the first one...
midnight hour

Awwwwwww shit! Now what am I going to do with these 3 tickets to the Jeff Foxworthy concert?

[tncinmd]

Originally Posted by JnCC

My question to you is..."Why are your preferences a "matter of personal taste," while mine are "based on ignorant prejudices or too many visits to a certain swim club?" Is that how you and Mrs Monkey respond to new couples at your club who aren't into the same things as you, or who don't play by the same rules as you do?

I gather from your previous posts that you and Mrs S insist on the use of condoms in your play. I assume that you avoid people whom engage in high-risk behaviors as well. Apparently, this is where your "preference" becomes my "ignorant prejudice"...I don't play with the partners of people who engage in high-risk behaviors either.

NO method of protection is 100% effective in protecting against STD's (about 15% of all new cases of syphilis are transmitted through oral sex). If adding another layer of protection makes me "ignorant and prejudiced," then ignorant and prejudiced I be. But I won't be bullied or coerced into doing something that could put my personal health, or to that of my subsequent partners, at risk.

What you've failed to explain is, if all are using protection, how being with a woman in a gangbang as the 15th guy is any different from being her 15th partner in an mfm or one-on-one. If her having multiple partners is your concern, it should be a concern whether it's the result of a gangbang or multiple encounters.

So, unless you're insisting on being her first ever, you're taking exactly the risk you seem to be so hell-bent on avoiding. Also, you failed to explain how being involved as a single male in "swinging" is any less a case of not being a "datable" guy than waiting in line as an indicator.

Afterall, "swinging" is a couples-based activity. You are invited in, if at all, to provide that extra in a sexual context only, not as "dating" for the purpose of marriage or an ltr. So, what say you ?

[EvilMJ]

Originally Posted by JnCC

They've been waiting for you over on the "Married Men Who Cheat" message board.

No, wait...it was the "Wife Beaters" message board.

Or was it the "We're Child Molesters, What's it to Ya?" message board?

Seriously...your response was priceless!

You're not related to Dan Quale, are you?

Okay, until now I never jumped into these arguments because I feel that we all have a difference of opinion and that what makes these boards a good thing, honest debate of a subject.

For the first time ever I feel you have stopped making an argument and started getting offensive. There is a huge difference between people participating in an activity that all participants are in agreement, and an activity where someone is being hurt or abused. You attempt at humour has become very poor in taste and not at all appreciated. You are making judgements on people you know nothing about - you assume because people live in a trailer park they are to be looked down upon as low life and welfare recipients. You judge others without knowing their situation; well guess what, there are any number of unforeseen circumstances that could leave you living on the streets with nothing to your name.

And this goes to all board members as well, there is no need for name calling, judgments or rudeness when a subject is being talked about or debated. Yes it is okay to disagree with someone, chances are you are not going to sway them to your side of the argument, but I don't think that gives anyone the go ahead to resort to name calling, insults or any other offensives behaviour.

Now, if you want to disagree with my point of view, have at it, I love a good debate, but let’s leave the crap at the door people and act like intelligent adults.

[Spoomonkey]

Originally Posted by JnCC

They've been waiting for you over on the "Married Men Who Cheat" message board.

No, wait...it was the "Wife Beaters" message board.

Or was it the "We're Child Molesters, What's it to Ya?" message board?

Seriously...your response was priceless!

You're not related to Dan Quale, are you?

Wow you are brainless...

Cheaters, child molesters and wife beaters come from all social stripe. I do not agree with any of that, but I would not devolve to a mouth breathing idiot as you have done by assuming where they all live and what that must say about them. And if you can't figure it out, go back and read your comments about trailer parks - or even the one above about Jeff Foxworthy tickets.

And - when you learn to spell "Quayle" maybe we can have an intelligent debate

Spoomonkey

PS - See, I picked on your inability to spell without even mentioning that you live in Kentucky...

[hilltop]

Hey guys,

I'm thinking we may need to cut JnCC some slack.
The best thing we can do for him is to ignore his attacks.

He's standing in front of that complex machine called life.
And being unsure of it's purpose or how it works, he just starts pushing buttons on the front of it.

He pushes those buttons because he want's it to react. Although he's desperate for those reactions and the attention they bring, he's afraid.

He's hoping he can damage the machine somehow so that it will be less threatening. It's sad really because he seems to have a mind capable of understanding the true nature of it..

Lacking substance in his life he substitutes it with attitude and the false sense of superiority it brings. Look at the phrase he's used in the location line of his profile . . . I'm faster than . . . I'm smarter than . . . I'm better than . . . He's a perfect example of how we've all been trained to chase our own tail and not pay attention to the things that really matter.

JnCC, there's a better way man. I hope you discover it someday!

Post what you want, say what you will, I won't respond to it.

This will be my last regarding your poor social behavior but I wanted to say these things because:

I used to be just like you.

[Chicup]

My favorite swing partner (outside of my wife), who's swinging cherry I broke a few years back, and who I currently play with about once or twice a month, most likely has had sex with at least 10 different guys since then. I don't have a problem with this.

On the other hand if I found out she had a 10 guy gang bang I most likely would have a problem with this. The reason would be her lack of being selective in partners. When you are meeting new couples etc, you can be selective, when you are mailing 20 guys, or getting all the single males in a club together, you are no longer being selective beyond 'has penis'.

Sure its not a 100% guarantee, but its better than 'anything goes'.

[JnCC]

Originally Posted by tncinmd

What you've failed to explain is, if all are using protection, how being with a woman in a gangbang as the 15th guy is any different from being her 15th partner in an mfm or one-on-one. If her having multiple partners is your concern, it should be a concern whether it's the result of a gangbang or multiple encounters.

If the only criteria is "whether or not all are using protection," what difference does it make WHO the woman is having sex with? Could be 15 guys, could be 150. Could be a Kennedy, could be homeless guy. It could even be me, if I were into that. If understand you correctly, you're saying that "dick is dick," and so long as it's wrapped, it doesn't matter who you're sharing it with.

Sorry, but for me, that's false security. I've NEVER known a woman to ask a man to put on a condom before oral sex, which is important, because almost every STD of significance can be passed through oral sex. Avoiding those who live on the "edge," or who practice what I consider "high risk" behaviors, is my first line of defense against STD's, and a line I observe in consideration of ALL my potential sexual partners long before the issue of condom use is raised. If you want to have gang bangs, fine, more power to you! Your choice of men will be governed by what's available to you. If you can get frat boys, that's fine. If you have to settle for homeless men and guys too cheap to pay for an hour with a hooker, that's fine too, because I'm not responsible for your sexual health, only my own.

I'm not interested in being the "number 16" of anything, either. Being the #2, 3, 4, maybe even the #5 among a small group of carefully selected gentlemen might work if I knew the woman and there were a similar number of other women at the party. But to stand there among a bunch of guys I don't know and who probably don't know each other, yanking our puds, checking out each others equipment, and waiting our turn to fuck a woman who probably isn't even opening her eyes just isn't my cup of tea. I know you'll never understand where I'm coming from, and that's understandable. But places where ANYBODY can stick their dick are generally places where I won't.

If there's no difference between 15 men over a period of time and 15 men all at once, why does that specific activity have it's own name?

If I'm in the minority among single males in feeling as I do about GB'S, why do couples have to invite 20 guys to get three to show up?

Here's another question I have that will surely piss you off...of the 3 that DO show up, do you honestly think it's the best 3, or is it the 3 who don't have anything else to do? Where are the other 17? Jacking off in some porn theater? Invited to a "better" GB, perhaps? My guess is that most feel as do, and have more respect for themselves (or more dating options) than those who show up.

* As an aside - If I invited 1 guy to "come fuck my wife, PLEASE" and he didn't show up, it would be a real dissapointment. If I invited 20, confirmed 10, and only 3 showed up, most women I know would be in tears...

So, unless you're insisting on being her first ever, you're taking exactly the risk you seem to be so hell-bent on avoiding.

Where do you get that idea? It's certainly not from anybody who works in public health, that's for sure.

I've tried explaining it the best I can, but apparently my words fail. If you truly believe that people who make a habit of having sex with 15 people at once don't carry significantly more risk of STD's than those who have it with 1, or perhaps a few carefully selected individuals over time, PM me and I'll find you some links. Better yet, ask your family physician or anybody at your local public health organization. They'll probably recommend that you be tested imediately.

Also, you failed to explain how being involved as a single male in "swinging" is any less a case of not being a "datable" guy than waiting in line as an indicator.

That's why I don't consider myself a "single male in swinging." Being single and being a swinger is in may ways the same, the difference being that a couple knows who they're going home with all the time, while I don't know who I'm going home with until I'm somewhere into the date. Even then, it doesn't always work out.

Some single males who prefer swinging to dating are "dateable," sometimes very much so. The reason they're at the clubs every weekend is because swinging offers them an opportunity to do something dating doesn't...fuck another mans wife in his presence. It's not important for me to "take" something from another man. When it comes to sex, I'm a sportsman, not a poacher. I don't need to hang around a club waiting to cop a feel in the dark from a woman who is half-aroused, half-naked, and half drunk or stoned.

Afterall, "swinging" is a couples-based activity. You are invited in, if at all, to provide that extra in a sexual context only, not as "dating" for the purpose of marriage or an ltr. So, what say you ?

I say you are absolutely correct...I also say that with those very few couples with whom I'm still an occasional "third" that's exactly how it works. HOWEVER...and I credit this thread for bringing this to mind...the reason those people keep me in their pool of occasional play-partners may be precisely because they know I'm discrete about who I'll fuck. If passing up an occasional GB or prostitute, and staying away from some of that other borderline crazy shit that other guys are aparently into keeps me on their "good" list, it's a price I don't mind paying.

Something in my response to this topic has obviously struck a chord with a few couples in here, and I don't think it's my comment about "trailer parks." Could it be that I, as a single man, is saying "No thanks" to something you all think we should be happy as pigs-in-shit to get?

[CA91709]

Mr. CA here.... the Mrs. is at work right now.

I can understand where your coming from JnCC. Standing in line is NOT my idea of fun. Don't think I'd get into it either. But if someone wants to get something going, its up to them to do it right. I don't think that many women would want to have unprotected sex with a large group of `Stray Dog' men. It just seems that it would be a minority of people that would get into something like that on a whim or a lark.

Is a Gangbang that is run with protection any riskier then an multi-partner Orgy? Don't know, there are so many variables such as how well you know your partners, etc. That being said, a GB does have only a single focal point which is being watched by all. A condom slipping off is noticed. The unrestrained indulgence of an Orgy has plenty of opportunity for mistakes and slip-ups with condom use that may well go unobserved. As with any behavior, risk versus reward should be weighed IMHO.

[tncinmd]

Well, JNCC, thanks for taking the time to actually address the points I made.

As far as being upset about your "trailer park", etc remarks, I think they were dumb and unkind, but not personally upsetting. If you are serious and stick to the actual questions and points, you get more reasonable results, hopefully, a frank and spirited discussion of the issues.

Prersonally, I don't care if you choose to particiapte in an activity or not. No one should ever be put in a position where they are uncomfortable. No activity is worth that. But to denigrate anyone else for their choices, well, that goes beyond personal preferences. There are no end of people that will tell you you are no less indulging in risky behavior by not practicing chastity before marriage and monogamy forever thereafter. I'm sure you're more than able to make our own choices and defend them, which should lend you more understanding of the choices of others.

I've seen here references to 15, 20, 30 strangers, which surprises me. Most (I did not say all) "swingers" who've been in the "lifestyle" for an extended period of time would have accumulated way more partners than that. And, of course, they were all strangers prior to meeting and you basically have taken their word for their past, unless you've done extensive research or hired a P.I.. Now, we feel that multiple partner sex with a whole bunch of strangers is beyond our comfort zone, but we have enough partners to ensure a successful adventure with surety that they will show up, if we want to induge in that activity.

Don't get into the "it has it's own name" thing. Believe me, you don't want to go there. I've seen arguemnts break out over whether it's a GB if it's less than X number of men, whether you know them or not, whether it's one at a time ("standing in line") or several at once, etc. You see, there are no end of people who want to be the arbiters of what a particular activity is. Besides, everything has it's own name, gangbang, orgy, threesome, swinging, etc. We always use definitions to communicate an activity, then endlessly argue about what they really mean.

So, anyway, good luck to you. I just think you'd get better results without the offensive references if you are really interested in a frank discussion.

[hilltop]

tncinmd,

Nicely said. Really good post.

[TNT]

I have been following this thread closely and thinking..What do I feel about GBs ?

Basically I am of two minds, much like Julie's quote below.

Originally Posted by JustAskJulie

IMO, there's two different types of GB's, a GB where the girl is the center of attention and getting said attention from more than one guy at a time (and giving attention to more than one guy at a time) and a train. The latter, unfortunately, is what most people envision when they think of a GB, a long line of guys waiting, cock in hand, to have sex with a girl as she lies back and takes them on. That's not my idea of fun.

In the first scenario, where the woman is the center of attention, hell yes I would like that...especially since I have worn out three men before (yes, in one play session ) and a few more would have been a welcomed addition that night .

The second scenario, the train, nope...not appealing to me at all. I'm selfish and want the men I have sex with to make sure I'm having a good time and in this particular scenario I could not be assured that they would.

It seems that a lot of people assume that when a woman wants to have a gang bang that she chooses the men indiscriminately. I am sure there are women who do, but I'm equally as sure that there are women who don't. Either way, it's her choice.

Why the hell does it matter if a woman has sex with 5, 10 or 15 men in one night or 5, 10, 15 men over a period of two or three months? If she knows all these men, practices safe sex and enjoys what she is doing the outcome is the same...she had sex with a lot of different men. It’s not the woman that has changed, only your perception of her.

There are women out there who love GB’s and there are men out there who love them. If you don’t , NO BIG DEAL! You don’t have to participate in any way shape or form. You don’t even have to play with those who do enjoy them.

It still amazes me that even in this day and age and in this particular type of lifestyle that there are so many people who still look at a sexually liberated woman like a piece of shit, if she happens to enjoy having sex with more than one man at a time or has had sex with many men throughout her life....funny, but it’s still more acceptable for a man to have had sex with 15 different women than it is for a woman to have had sex with 15 different men; regardless if it was all at once or at different times.

Teresa
(who is very, very glad that she has a husband who looks down on no one for the number of people they have sex with at any given time).

[jcbicouple]

Originally Posted by TNT

In the first scenario, where the woman is the center of attention, hell yes I would like that...especially since I have worn out three men before (yes, in one play session ) and a few more would have been a welcomed addition that night .

You should try it! It's as much fun as it sounds! As we've said before, we've never had one where the men acted disrespectful, and we always try to have sex with people who can hold a conversation......Otherwise what would you do during "rest for a minute" time?
We must add though that it can be somewhat trying (to the point where we just flat gave up for awhile) to find enough guys that we would have sex with and would really show up. It is about 50/50 show/no show.
Before you start JNCC: It's the same for setting up ANY meeting (couples or individual singles) not just the gang bangs!

[TNT]

Originally Posted by jcbicouple

You should try it!

I have every intention of doing so one day...but damn, with our schedule and the schedule of the men I would want to be there, finding a time that is good for everyone is very hard.

Oh well....all good things come to those who wait.


Teresa