Friends VS Just Playmates - Page 2

EternallySingle · 06-14-2005, 01:42 AM

While I'd like to believe friendship can come first, my experience, much to my chagrin, has been that the sex has to come before the friendship whether its dating or swinging. Whenever I tried being friends first, or tried combining friendship with sex, I'd get the "I like you and thought of you that way in the beginning, but I don't want to ruin our friendship now by having sex" talk, both from single women and couples.

But thats just my experience. It could be that I have a more narrow view of what friendship means or that I've been meeting the wrong people.

EvilMJ · 06-14-2005, 07:24 AM

I have had friends who we swung with, and then non vanilla couples who became friends after we got together.

I have to say I much prefer becoming friends after sex. THat way if you decide at some point that you no longer want to have sex with them, it does not ruin the friendship becuase you both understand that this is just sex and not a personal thing. It is harder to tell the people who are friends first that you want to end the sex aspect of your relationship as they may take it personal and you could lose a good friend.

Then there are times when you don't want to have any kind of relationship wtih them at all and just want sex....hey, I take it case by case

xxoticangel · 06-14-2005, 08:45 AM

We have to agree with EvilMJ on this. We have had friends that became playmates and the sex was just so-so. Its uncomfortable telling someone that you have made an investment in that you like them just not "That way" expecially after we have crossed the line into sex. On the other hand we have had great mind blowing sex with people that we didn't know and after found out that we had nothing in common with.

That said, we are very selective when giving the title "friend" to someone. A friend is someone you can count on to be there in any situation. An acquaintance is something else. We have may lifestyle acquanitances, have played with some, and may play with them again.

Swinging is about sex and connecting on a primal hedonistic level. Just because we're not friends doesn't mean we can't have a good time together.

Swingers Ads	Swinger Pics	Swinger Stories	Shopping	Search Swingers	Swingers Clubs	Swinger Articles	Dictionary	FAQs	Swinger Links
Forums	Register	Swinger Events	Search	Today's Posts	Mark Forums Read	Chat Room

06-14-2005, 01:42 AM	#16 (permalink)
EternallySingle Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Apr 2003 Posts: 1,035 Location: Michigan Status: Single Male Swing Lifestyle Name:ABSingleMan	Re: Friends VS Just Playmates While I'd like to believe friendship can come first, my experience, much to my chagrin, has been that the sex has to come before the friendship whether its dating or swinging. Whenever I tried being friends first, or tried combining friendship with sex, I'd get the "I like you and thought of you that way in the beginning, but I don't want to ruin our friendship now by having sex" talk, both from single women and couples. But thats just my experience. It could be that I have a more narrow view of what friendship means or that I've been meeting the wrong people.
	__________________ "Style is not lusting after somone because they are cool. Style is loving yourself till everyone else does too." Prince

06-14-2005, 07:24 AM	#17 (permalink)
EvilMJ Pure Evil..In a cute suit Join Date: Aug 2004 Posts: 2,497 Location: Nova Scotia Status: Couple	Re: Friends VS Just Playmates I have had friends who we swung with, and then non vanilla couples who became friends after we got together. I have to say I much prefer becoming friends after sex. THat way if you decide at some point that you no longer want to have sex with them, it does not ruin the friendship becuase you both understand that this is just sex and not a personal thing. It is harder to tell the people who are friends first that you want to end the sex aspect of your relationship as they may take it personal and you could lose a good friend. Then there are times when you don't want to have any kind of relationship wtih them at all and just want sex....hey, I take it case by case
	__________________ "Well! Evil to some is always good to others." - Jane Austen

06-14-2005, 08:45 AM	#18 (permalink)
xxoticangel Hot and Horny in ATL Join Date: Jun 2004 Posts: 381 Location: Atlanta, GA Status: Couple Swing Lifestyle Name:xxoticangel	Re: Friends VS Just Playmates We have to agree with EvilMJ on this. We have had friends that became playmates and the sex was just so-so. Its uncomfortable telling someone that you have made an investment in that you like them just not "That way" expecially after we have crossed the line into sex. On the other hand we have had great mind blowing sex with people that we didn't know and after found out that we had nothing in common with. That said, we are very selective when giving the title "friend" to someone. A friend is someone you can count on to be there in any situation. An acquaintance is something else. We have may lifestyle acquanitances, have played with some, and may play with them again. Swinging is about sex and connecting on a primal hedonistic level. Just because we're not friends doesn't mean we can't have a good time together.
	__________________ Multiple orgasms are proof that God is a woman.

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Switch to Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode

Similar Threads
Thread	Thread Starter	Forum	Replies	Last Post
Friends: Possible Playmates?	Ave Satanas	Swinging with NON swingers	6	06-20-2007 04:04 PM