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Thread: First MFM

  1. #1
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    Default First MFM

    We finally had our first MFM this past weekend. I will break the "Event" into 2 parts since it wasnt planned as one continuous of night of MFM.
    Part 1 was the MFM, it was great. Part 2 was my wife and her date plus me, kind of a third wheel situation, was ok, but we learned that we needed to communicate more.

    Background is my wife has a regular playmate. And we've been talking about an MFM between the 3 of us for a while, but never had the situation fit very well (we had a hotel one night, but then he had family issues arise and had to cut it short, another planned night my wife was sick...)

    Anyway, we had overnight sitting all set up, so did he (he's a hall pass hubby), his wife was off at her boyfriend's place, it wasnt the time of the month, everything was lining up.

    Plans were to meet at our house, enjoy some MFM time, then head off to a party and for myself to find a gal and then finish the night as separates (wife and her date, and myself and whomever I found) playing wherever we could.

    The MFM part started at our house, and it was glorious. My wife started out being between us as we undressed her, and then kissed me a bit and started in with him. I was watching, very much enjoying seeing the passion between the two of them. Then it was my turn, and he watched. Couple hours had passed by now (we each went for about 45mins or so). Then we did the classic chain, she gave him a BJ and I did it with her from behind. It was glorious. Everyone making noises, all of us comfortable with each other.. Very fun.

    After that we all washed up and head out to a party. It was planned as my wife and him as dates, and I was hoping to find a playmate in the crowd.
    On the way to the party my wife and date did it in the back of the van. Was pretty good for me at the start, kind of a novelty to be driving with that going on in the back, but the novelty wore off quickly and I found that I prefer participating over watching, and the inability to hear what they were whispering was distracting too. I discussed this when we arrived at the party, he understood my point (he'd done the same thing with his wife and another before).

    Got to the party and we spotted 2 potential gals. Talked with the first one (married gal) a while, no go, she was a couples only same room play type, her hubby was too drunk to participate at all.
    Went over to the other gal (single gal) and hit it off, and it seemed like there was potential. She was into me, I was enjoying her, and we started to make out. Made out, lots of roaming hands, spent about 45 minutes with each other enjoying the evening. Discussed rules and preferences at that time, everything seemed good, we signed up for the playroom.


    Well 2 hours later, the playroom finally opened up, so we made our way there.. Then she drops the bomb and says she couldnt play. I asked why, and she just smiled and said she cant. Alluded to a medical issue, but wouldnt elaborate. Well my arousal dropped like a stone at this point, mainly because nearly 2 hours earlier when we discussed play rules and preferences she made no mention of being unable to play tonight. And I thought that would have been a more proper time to say so. At this point I told her that I was a bit taken back by the inability to play statement, and she said "I thought you knew that all along?" I said "no, if I did why did we go and sign up for the playroom?" She just smiled again and said let's kiss instead.
    I said goodnight, I had fun, but I doubt I could mask my disinterest at this point.

    Met up with my wife and her date and headed home.

    Got home and this is where the failure to communicate arose. My wife really only wanted to have a short session with me, then a longer one with him and wanted to fall asleep with him. But she didnt say this, and I couldnt quite tell either.
    So, we sort of went back to the MFM, she played with him and me at the same time, my hands on her, his cock in her, my cock in her, his hands.. this was about an hour or so.
    Then she rode him for another good hour, and then was done for the night.
    She fell asleep, and it wasnt surprising considering her activity level and how late it was. I wasnt really done, but she was sleeping, so I went to another bed to sleep. He stayed in our bed. I was having issues at this point, needed to talk with her.

    They woke up a few hours later (he had to leave in morning) and had sex again. I woke up around the time he had to leave, and stumbled back to my bedroom, and they were going at it. Kind of like a last hurrah before he had to leave. Was pretty hot to see, although I still had some issues with feelings of not being done myself.

    He left, we talked quite a bit, I told her all of my views and feelings on the night, she didnt realize that I felt so slighted about it. She told me that she actually felt like the MFM part of the night stopped when we left, and when we got home it should have been just him and her. I said that's fine, next time we need to plan it like that, although I did say that I would need to have one final session with her to get off at least before going to bed.

    So in the end it all worked out well, although at the time, I was feeling like a third wheel. The early part of the MFM was great, that was about as good as could be expected, it's just the second half of the night that didnt work.

  2. #2
    Swingers Board Guide funcoupledayton's Avatar
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    Default Re: First MFM

    Thanks for your story and analysis. Glad you two are able to talk through the good and bad in a level-headed manner, appreciate the good and move on to the next good time. I think most of us have been in similar situations, so you're not alone. Thanks again for sharing!

  3. #3
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    Default Re: First MFM

    Yes we definitely had a different attitude and comfort level than back when we started.

    The story ended up being too long so I cut out some parts, but one part was that when we got back home after the party my wife wanted to have the 3 of lying in bed with her in the middle, sort of cuddling. At this time though she also was on the fence with what she wanted to do, she wanted me there, on the other hand she felt done with the 3 way and really just wanted some 1v1 time with her guy. And we talked a little bit, and I told her to just go ahead and do what she wants because that way we would actually have something to discuss and learn from .

    Guess Im saying that at this stage we are at the comfort level that we can do something first and then analyze it later and tweak it for the next time. We find that a ton of discussion ahead of time works, but theory is hard to really figure out and until you actually do it, you dont know what your feelings will be about it. So we discuss things, but in the end if we are ok with it but just dont quite know we just do it and then we do know.

    Such as the car thing. Sounded like a cool idea to us. But both me and the other guy have been the driver in that situation before, and both of us have now said that being the driver is lame and actually distracting. I was seriously considering turning on the radio just to drown out the unintelligible (from my distance) whispers that I could hear bits and pieces of but not really make out. The other guy mentioned that when he did it eventually he couldnt stand it and he drove to a parking lot and parked so it was quiet enough for him to hear and watch.

    It's a funny thing. We can play separate just fine, we can play in the same room fine, but put us at a distance where we can not quite hear each other but still hear bits and pieces and it's not fine. Not a lot of situations would lead to such a thing at least.

    Other things of note were that once again communication is king. We talked extensively about the night before it happened, went through a number of scenarios, and that gave us the confidence that whatever we did, we knew that at least we had discussed it in some fashion and we could just let the night go as it may and then discuss whatever we felt about it the next day.

    Overall we are happy we finally had an MFM and now we have a rather good idea of how to make it work really well. Eventually the stars will align and we will have another. Probably with him again, although there are a few other guys on the potential list too, one of which has his own place without kids so it would be much more likely.

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