First date with another couple

2for2nc · 09-01-2008, 11:06 AM

Well this is kind of tame for a lot of you I know but it was exciting for us. We had our first date with another couple! Met them on Swing Lifestyle and made a date for dinner and drinks. The best part for us is that they turned out to be a very "normal" couple. Being new we were kind of worried about meeting some stalkers or something.

Conversation was great and we decided to go dancing afterwards. The only downside to the evening was that it went by so fast. Nothing really swing related happened. It was just two couples out together having a good time.

The only mistake I think that we made was sending them a couple of messages the day after. Nothing weird just saying we had a great time and would love to do it again sometime. We were just excited to meet someone we were interested in and wanted to know if they felt the same way.

I hope we didn't come across as too agressive...

Now I'm worried that they are going to think we are stalking them or something.

I guess we will just lay off for awhile and let them make the next move. What do you guys think? I feel like I'm in the 7th grade again..lol

**lustylearning** · 09-01-2008, 11:19 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 2for2nc

Well this is kind of tame for a lot of you I know but it was exciting for us. We had our first date with another couple! Met them on Swing Lifestyle and made a date for dinner and drinks. The best part for us is that they turned out to be a very "normal" couple. Being new we were kind of worried about meeting some stalkers or something.

Conversation was great and we decided to go dancing afterwards. The only downside to the evening was that it went by so fast. Nothing really swing related happened. It was just two couples out together having a good time.

The only mistake I think that we made was sending them a couple of messages the day after. Nothing weird just saying we had a great time and would love to do it again sometime. We were just excited to meet someone we were interested in and wanted to know if they felt the same way.

I hope we didn't come across as too agressive...

Now I'm worried that they are going to think we are stalking them or something.

I guess we will just lay off for awhile and let them make the next move. What do you guys think? I feel like I'm in the 7th grade again..lol

I wouldn't worry about it. Be yourself. If you stay true to who you are, you will draw those that like you for you, and "appearances" will become less important.

realcplub2 · 09-01-2008, 11:22 AM

Stop worrying..

There is no set etiquette, But, what you did was well within the realm of acceptable..

If you hadnt written, taken DAYS, if not a week or two, then you would have been on the opposite end of the spectrum, that rude inconsiderate couple..

So RELAX

midnightplayer · 09-01-2008, 11:25 AM

Congratulations on the successful evening. You can never go wrong being kind, considerate and appreciative of their effort to make the evening great. Chill out and enjoy the memory of the evening and go for a second one with the same couple or another

socolais · 09-01-2008, 11:44 AM

I remember how exciting it was - there were times I wasn't sure if my thinking was controlled by the big head or the little one. It doesn't matter if "official sex" was involved, just the sexually charged encounter where everyone knew sharing sexual pleasures is a very REAL possibility. Pay more attention to each other and less about following some unwritten rules with others - the friends you want to spend time with are quite likely to be completely understanding of your inexperience.

Hang on for a fun ride.......

2for2nc · 09-01-2008, 12:09 PM

Thanks guys. That makes us feel a little better. I've forgotten what it's like to "date" It's been 12 years or so for both of us since we went on a date with anyone but ourselves. I guess the same rules apply whether it's two people or two couples.

**fun4Ds** · 09-01-2008, 03:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 2for2nc

Thanks guys. That makes us feel a little better. I've forgotten what it's like to "date" It's been 12 years or so for both of us since we went on a date with anyone but ourselves. I guess the same rules apply whether it's two people or two couples.

Thats cool everything went great

2for2nc · 09-01-2008, 06:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by fun4Ds

Thats cool everything went great

It really did! The time just flew by so I take that as a sign we were having fun.

**fun4Ds** · 09-01-2008, 08:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 2for2nc

It really did! The time just flew by so I take that as a sign we were having fun.

That depends, on where talking ends and more fun begins

bbarnsworth · 09-02-2008, 09:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 2for2nc

I hope we didn't come across as too agressive...

Now I'm worried that they are going to think we are stalking them or something.

I guess we will just lay off for awhile and let them make the next move. What do you guys think? I feel like I'm in the 7th grade again..lol

I wouldn't try to out think yourself. Do yourself a big favor and don't over analyze this. There's a saying that doesn't apply to this lifestyle, but there's wisdom in it related to this topic; "If you believe there's a conspiracy, you just need to dig hard enough and you'll find evidence of one, even if there isn't one"

If you over analyze, you'll start seeing shadows as real, and read so far into each word you hear/read you'll cast the impression you're a wacko to the people you're trying to please.

Relax. Take a deep breath. Have a drink or two.

If they contact you back, they contact you back. If they don't, you'll never know why and it doesn't matter. That's just like dating; move on to the next, and stop sweating the details.

2for2nc · 09-02-2008, 07:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bbarnsworth

Relax. Take a deep breath. Have a drink or two.

If they contact you back, they contact you back. If they don't, you'll never know why and it doesn't matter. That's just like dating; move on to the next, and stop sweating the details.

That's exactly what we decided to do. I think we just got a little excited the day after. We'll play it much cooler next time.

mervsmom97 · 09-02-2008, 09:14 PM

We are new to this too, and I have felt the same way you did. We found ourselves asking, "Were we too aggressive.", or,"Maybe they just didn't like us." In the end everything worked out for the best, but I really felt like I was dating again. Silly, but if you felt that way, and we felt that way, chances are most of the people here have.

mixtupcpl · 09-02-2008, 09:47 PM

Congratulations! Sounds like you guys had a great time and did really well. Im sure there was at least some chemistry since they wanted to go dancing with you.

My wife and I are hoping our first time is like this. For us, this aspect of it is actually kind of more exciting than the sexual aspect

ShagUsThx · 09-03-2008, 06:57 AM

We definitely like to hear back from the other couple and would not see it as aggressive at all. I know what you mean though... too much? not enough? Like the others said, when in doubt.... relax! Its all good and in the end, it's way better than regular dating. You are not alone going to the date and how ever it ends you're not going home alone either. (You win either way, and you have a story!)
As you are looking back to your dating days, remember how difficult it was to find the right person to "click" with, well now there are 4 people (maybe 3 maybe more) trying to "click"!
It is nice to hear of your success and it won't be your last. Good luck!

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09-01-2008, 11:06 AM	#1 (permalink)
2for2nc Registered Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 6 Location: NC Status: Married Couple	First date with another couple Well this is kind of tame for a lot of you I know but it was exciting for us. We had our first date with another couple! Met them on Swing Lifestyle and made a date for dinner and drinks. The best part for us is that they turned out to be a very "normal" couple. Being new we were kind of worried about meeting some stalkers or something. Conversation was great and we decided to go dancing afterwards. The only downside to the evening was that it went by so fast. Nothing really swing related happened. It was just two couples out together having a good time. The only mistake I think that we made was sending them a couple of messages the day after. Nothing weird just saying we had a great time and would love to do it again sometime. We were just excited to meet someone we were interested in and wanted to know if they felt the same way. I hope we didn't come across as too agressive... Now I'm worried that they are going to think we are stalking them or something. I guess we will just lay off for awhile and let them make the next move. What do you guys think? I feel like I'm in the 7th grade again..lol

09-01-2008, 11:22 AM	#3 (permalink)
realcplub2 Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Aug 2007 Posts: 521 Location: North Central Florida Status: Couple Swing Lifestyle Name:putnamcocpl Blog Entries: 17	Re: First date with another couple Stop worrying.. There is no set etiquette, But, what you did was well within the realm of acceptable.. If you hadnt written, taken DAYS, if not a week or two, then you would have been on the opposite end of the spectrum, that rude inconsiderate couple.. So RELAX __________________ Reality Checks written Upon Request

09-01-2008, 11:25 AM	#4 (permalink)
midnightplayer Here to Stay Join Date: Jul 2006 Posts: 81 Location: Scottsdale Status: Married Male Swing Lifestyle Name:Midnightplayer	Re: First date with another couple Congratulations on the successful evening. You can never go wrong being kind, considerate and appreciative of their effort to make the evening great. Chill out and enjoy the memory of the evening and go for a second one with the same couple or another

09-01-2008, 11:44 AM	#5 (permalink)
socolais nothin special Join Date: Mar 2007 Posts: 939 Location: Dallas Status: M. Male - half of a novice swinging couple Swing Lifestyle Name:Bruce_Melissa Blog Entries: 12	Re: First date with another couple I remember how exciting it was - there were times I wasn't sure if my thinking was controlled by the big head or the little one. It doesn't matter if "official sex" was involved, just the sexually charged encounter where everyone knew sharing sexual pleasures is a very REAL possibility. Pay more attention to each other and less about following some unwritten rules with others - the friends you want to spend time with are quite likely to be completely understanding of your inexperience. Hang on for a fun ride....... __________________ I like her because she smiles at me and means it

09-01-2008, 12:09 PM	#6 (permalink)
2for2nc Registered Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 6 Location: NC Status: Married Couple	Re: First date with another couple Thanks guys. That makes us feel a little better. I've forgotten what it's like to "date" It's been 12 years or so for both of us since we went on a date with anyone but ourselves. I guess the same rules apply whether it's two people or two couples.

09-02-2008, 09:14 PM	#12 (permalink)
mervsmom97 Swingers Board Addict Join Date: May 2008 Posts: 109 Location: Maine Status: M.Female Swing Lifestyle Name:friskymecpl	Re: First date with another couple We are new to this too, and I have felt the same way you did. We found ourselves asking, "Were we too aggressive.", or,"Maybe they just didn't like us." In the end everything worked out for the best, but I really felt like I was dating again. Silly, but if you felt that way, and we felt that way, chances are most of the people here have. __________________ "I'm sorry, but I think that some women pride themselves on their dick taking abilities"-Superbad

09-02-2008, 09:47 PM	#13 (permalink)
mixtupcpl Swingers Board Addict Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 175 Location: Pennsylvania Status: Couple Swing Lifestyle Name:mixtupcpl	Re: First date with another couple Congratulations! Sounds like you guys had a great time and did really well. Im sure there was at least some chemistry since they wanted to go dancing with you. My wife and I are hoping our first time is like this. For us, this aspect of it is actually kind of more exciting than the sexual aspect

09-03-2008, 06:57 AM	#14 (permalink)
ShagUsThx Active Member Join Date: Aug 2008 Posts: 43 Location: Colorado Status: Couple	Re: First date with another couple We definitely like to hear back from the other couple and would not see it as aggressive at all. I know what you mean though... too much? not enough? Like the others said, when in doubt.... relax! Its all good and in the end, it's way better than regular dating. You are not alone going to the date and how ever it ends you're not going home alone either. (You win either way, and you have a story!) As you are looking back to your dating days, remember how difficult it was to find the right person to "click" with, well now there are 4 people (maybe 3 maybe more) trying to "click"! It is nice to hear of your success and it won't be your last. Good luck!

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