Our first experience

[m9sept74]

This is a long post but I think it will be helpful for all those newbies.
First a little about us; we are in our late 40’s, have been married for 30 years, only marriage for both. The whole swinging thing was brought up by me, the male half. The wife at first was shocked, but after considerable hours of talking over a period of time and reading numerous post on SWINGERS BOARD, she agreed to explore the possibility of swinging.
We dabbled in this for a little over two years…going to strip clubs, a couple of on-premise clubs and a private house party, but our playing had been limited to watching and being watched. We have profiles posted on a couple of different websites and we have met several couples from the websites with only one no show. All the couples we met have been very nice, but we just could seem to find the couple where all “clicked”. We were to the point where we were about to give up and forget the whole thing when we made contact with a couple via an Internet site. We exchanged some e-mail to get to know each other. We found that we had a lot of things in common and it seemed like a good fit. We set up a dinner date, which went very well. The other couple only had a couple experiences over a two-year period so they were very selective as well. We met a couple of more times and exchanged more e-mail messages.
This past weekend they invited us to their home for the weekend. We accepted with reservations. The wife was looking forward to the experience, but she also had some major emotional feelings to deal with due to her very strict moralistic upbringing. Through chatting on messenger, we had all agreed that my wife was the slowest member of the group and that she would be the one to set the pace. On the way there, my wife and I talked about limits and signals to each other so that we knew if one or the other was uncomfortable with what was happening.
We spent the day with the other couple shopping, grilled steaks on the grill and then settled in to watch a porn movie later in the evening. We couldn’t have picked a better couple for our first experience. They were very patient and let us set the pace and make the first moves. My wife was on the sofa with the other husband and I was on the floor with the other wife resting our backs against the sofa. I was kissing the other wife when my wife got up off the sofa and lead the other husband into the bedroom. What a signal!!!
I guess you can say the rest is history. But the best part was the ride home the next day. The wife and I talked about our experiences and I was shocked that she had no regrets and was looking forward to her next experience. The following day we had another long drive together and whole conversation revolved around our experience and the experiences to come.
So my advice to all the newbies, have patience, communicate and when the right time and couple comes along the rewards will be many.
m9sept74

[BradAndJanet]

That's a great story, thanks for posting it! I'm sure it will give hope to a lot of people who are looking.

I'm glad you had a nice experience.

-B

[Alura]

What a great experience, M9Sept74! Y'all handled your introduction into the lifestyle perfectly! We look forward to hearing more from y'all.

Alura

[LikeMinds321]

Thanks for sharing your story with us.

It's a reminder that taking time to find a good match is very worthwhile.

There will be many more good times to come.

Happy New Swing Year 2005!

LM

[puneswings]

Congrats on your great intro to the lifestyle! Our first experience too was a great one, with a very patient and pleasant couple, but we unfortunately had screwed things up by our own immaturity (of course we are older and wiser now!) . I'm glad you had a good experience!

[intuition897]

That's a great story m9sept74! Our introduction to the lifestyle was very similar.

[mack033]

Wow, I was just going to make a post asking for some input and your story "nailed" it. My wife and I have been married over 20 years as well, and the morality issue will be a big one for her to overcome as well. It may take me two or three years as well but even if I can get to the soft swinging it will spark up out sex life. After being together so long I need one and I don't want to cheat. Wish me luck!!

[DBL D]

Hi m9sept74,

What a nice experience! And right near where you were about to give up. We have been pretty selective too and sometimes I have felt like it was too much work. Just when things were at a low point, we met a few really nice couples and now things seem to be heading in the right direction. We almost feel like pulling ourselves off the market...Not!

I'm happy for you!

Male D

[tommyb643]

that a great storie and i am happy to hear that everything worked out for you i am looking for some advice on how to talk to my wife abot the whole subject is there anyone here that could help me in my quest to make my relationship with my wife grow to a knew understatnding ?

[tommyb643]

hello can i ask u some ?
about swinging ?

[Spoomonkey]

Originally Posted by tommyb643

hello can i ask u some ?
about swinging ?

Go ahead, but my advice is if it is a general question, start it as a new thread. You will get more responses that way.



Spoomonkey

[m9sept74]

Originally Posted by tommyb643

hello can i ask u some ?
about swinging ?

I would be happy to answer any questions that you may have, but I think Spoomonkey made a great suggestion of posting your questions on the board for others to answer. It's better to get as much input from as many people as possible.
There are bunches of posts in the archives that make great reading for couples who are new and wanting to explore this lifestyle. We spent a considerable amount of time reading and researching (even bought the book "The Lifestyle" by Terry Gould). In our situation we took everything in baby steps, over a two year period.
To say the least, it has been an adventure. We have met a lot of nice couples that were very open to discussing the lifestyle and answering our MANY questions. My only suggestion would be to go out meet some people, talk, talk, talk, have fun and if something more than friendship evolves, great.
m9sept74

[rounder]

Great story, m9Sept74! If it would tickle you to share more details about the encounter, please do...reading about first-time experiences is a great turnon for other couples! Would love to know how the night proceeded and what your actions/reactions were!

[m9sept74]

Just wanted to give you an update about our second meeting with our new "friends", another great date. We went out for dinner, then to a movie and back to their house. We sat around chatting and flirting and then off to the bedroom where the guys gave the girls full body massages (together on one bed). My wifes fantasy of having another man give her a massage finally fulfilled!! She loved it!!!

My wife and I have both read on this and other websites about how the lifestyle can enhance a married couples own love life. All I can say is that a short time after arriving home from our play date my wife and I had the most mind blowing love session and she experienced her first female ejaculation, what a gusher!!!!! We were both surprised and her only response, "What have you done to me!"
m9sept74