Jump to content

Recommended Posts

Hi, we are a couple in our mid forties and we have recently started swinging. Most of the other swingers that we have found have all been in our age group. That is absolutely fine, since we are very attracted to people our age and older. However, we were thinking that it would be great to also find some younger people to add a little more energy to the night!

 

The question is, are there younger people - couples and women in their late 20's to early 30's - who are swingers? I assume there are, but how do we find them?

 

So far craigslist, AFF and SexyAds are where we find people, and those people have all been older. Heck, even the porn we surf is all "Milf" sites since they just seem more real. The sites that feature younger people all seem to be pros, or fake. Last weekend we even hired an escort to have an experience with a younger woman.

 

Any advice? Will we find them at sex clubs? We haven't been to one yet, but we're thinking of trying out a club this summer.

 

Thank you!!

Share this post


Link to post

We are in our late 30s and find that there aren't too many couples in our age range and younger. There are some, but it seems like most of them are MUCH younger (early 20s) and then there's a huge gap until you hit early 40s. The general belief is that most folks in between are too busy raising kids to get out much. That said, you might want to try a few of the sites a little more geared towards swingers, as well as some area swinger clubs. I'd suggest Kasidie, SwingerZoneCentral and SLS. Kasidie is quite popular on the West Coast so you may have some luck there.

Share this post


Link to post

I would try Kasidie and Lifestyle Lounge. Those are bigger sites in California. You can also call the clubs you are planning to attend and ask their age demographics.

 

We are in our late thirties also. We almost always play with couples older than us. We run into younger couples and singles online and at clubs. Really, though, they are nothing special. They don't have more energy or better moves. They do seem to drink and cry more though.

 

Was the young escort better than your older partners?

Share this post


Link to post

We've been lucky and have found a lot of early 30's swingers lately on our Couples Cruises. MOST people on the ship are over 45, but a good number will be in the 30's range. My oldest play partner for the last two cruises was 35.

 

We tend to just fit in better with that crowd in a big social setting, but from a swingers stand point, its not any better. If anything the younger crowd is slower to pull the swinging trigger and you end up playing at 2am because no one wanted to commit before then.

Share this post


Link to post

I agree with Julie, and submit SDC. Check out all of the websites and pay for the ones that are the most popular in your area. That is a good place to start. You can also find them at Swing Clubs, I know because we go to them, but those can also be hit or miss depending on the night and what they are promoting. We avoid Craigslist for multiple reasons. Also can't support the whole escort thing, you know because there is always the chance of going to jail.

 

We are 29/30 there are a handfull of couples in our area that are in our age range but there are a lot more who are not. I think it has to do with family obligations, and most couples in our age group have not been in a relationship long enough to try swinging. Maybe youger couples (19, or 20 ish) don't have as much to loose and that is why we find them on occasion.

 

Good luck, have fun.

Share this post


Link to post

Thank you all for your responses. We will check out those sites, but swingwife - you have a good point about family obligations. We would never have been ready to swing 10 years ago! Also, who can stay awake until 2 am!!?? Chicup - I've never heard of a couples cruise, how do we find out about those?

 

Our escort experience was fun - I wouldn't say it was any better, just different and fun. Since we are new to this whole thing, we are checking out every option, and that was great since we could really be in total control. I guess that's why we are interested in finding younger women and couples - to try every option.

 

Is craigslist always really bad? It seems like we are tending away from it, but it's funny - the people who sell you stuff and have bought stuff from us are all normal and not flakey. Why is it different with sex?

Share this post


Link to post
. . . Is craigslist always really bad? It seems like we are tending away from it, but it's funny - the people who sell you stuff and have bought stuff from us are all normal and not flakey. Why is it different with sex?
I know that the subject for discussion in this thread is not Craigslist. But I cannot let this comment go without a reply. Sex has brought down governments and has had people killed. Advertising and selling a used television set to somebody has seldom resulted in anything so dramatic. When sex is the motivation, all the rules are changed.

 

Now we return to the subject at hand. There are some younger ones. They are what people used to call DINKs -- Dual Income, No Kids. You'll find them at the swinger hook-up sites that the other members have already mentioned.

Share this post


Link to post

This came up for this this week as we re-evaluate what we are looking for. I'm open to older guys without an issue. He is not so open to older women... at least not when looking at profiles. In person, he doesn't notice and doesn't think twice about the fact that most of the women he encounters and enjoys are in their mid-40s or older... but he will pass over a profile of the same. We have had little luck with the few couples we encounter in our own age range, we do good to even get a response back that says something like "we have kids so it's hard for us to get out" (which is probably the response we get most often).

Share this post


Link to post

Well we are totally satisfied with finding people our own age and older. Like I said, we surf porn together quite often, and the porn that we like is all older, "real" women and couples. If someone were to say "all the younger swingers hang out at X", then we'd check it out and see what we could find. My husband is hoping that a young woman just comes up and starts flirting with me and we end up making out - yeah right!

Share this post


Link to post

You might find that you don't enjoy the experiance with a younger couple, espically if you like to make friends with couples you play with. You may not have as much in common with the youger couples and might not be able to relate. This could lead to issues developing that 4 way connection you need.

 

I agree with SW Pa Couple about Craigslist. It is differant from a dating site or a club. You generally have to pay money for those and you can be pretty sure that everyone is there for the same thing. Not ture on Craigslist. Because it is free it is full of flakes, fakes, and frauds. YMMV and we do know couples that have had some success, but to us the risk is not worth the reward.

Share this post


Link to post

I've noticed lately there are a lot of new young (18 -24y) couples on sls in our area. They are almost all looking for girls for threesomes though.

Share this post


Link to post

Hi, this is "the husband" here. Thank you all for your great advice. We are going slow, but we are very excited about the fun we've had and will have as swingers. I have kinda a silly question - my wife is right, I have this fantasy that she will just get picked up in a bar. Some cute young woman will have a few drinks with her, and by the end of the night they are making out. Best case scenario is that I'm not even there - she just comes home and tells me about it!

 

Does this ever really happen? It kinda sounds like a penthouse forum post or something, so I'm wondering if I should drop the fantasy and move on, or continue hoping... We've been going out to bars that have a reputation as cougar hangouts in hopes that something will occur.

 

Does anyone have any experience with the "casual" hook-up, or are they mostly pre-planned?

 

How about experiences with friends or casual acquaintences? We don't know anyone in our circle that are swingers, at least not that we know of, but we sure wish a few of them are...

 

Thanks again, we appreciate all of the advice.

Share this post


Link to post

If she is looking for a girl, I would suggest going to an LGBT club. The club in our area has people of all ages (many of them college age/young 20's). It's a very sexual environment. The hottest dancing anywhere! I'm pretty sure I could pick up a girl there if I were by myself, I have picked up young guys there (made out, but didn't actually go home with them, definitely could have).

 

When I was at a conference in California I went out with a group of girls to a regular bar. I did dance with a younger girl there. We didn't kiss, but it was fun.

 

I would stay away from vanilla friends. It's not worth the drama.

Share this post


Link to post

We are in your age range (mid 40s). We have had a few playmate couples that were in their 20s over the last 8 years and all of them without exception have now divorced. That is just our experience.

 

Generally, we have found that they don't have much sexual experience and are not that great in bed. The best playmates that we have had have been in their 30s and we have quite a few playmates that are hotties.

Share this post


Link to post
Hi, we are a couple in our mid forties and we have recently started swinging. Most of the other swingers that we have found have all been in our age group. That is absolutely fine, since we are very attracted to people our age and older. However, we were thinking that it would be great to also find some younger people to add a little more energy to the night!

 

The question is, are there younger people - couples and women in their late 20's to early 30's - who are swingers? I assume there are, but how do we find them?

 

So far craigslist, AFF and SexyAds are where we find people, and those people have all been older. Heck, even the porn we surf is all "Milf" sites since they just seem more real. The sites that feature younger people all seem to be pros, or fake. Last weekend we even hired an escort to have an experience with a younger woman.

 

Any advice? Will we find them at sex clubs? We haven't been to one yet, but we're thinking of trying out a club this summer.

 

Thank you!!

 

Sure there are. In the Maine area Sinz has a lot of younger couples. There's actually quite a few groups in New England (for example) that are just for younger swingers. Though 40-50 seems to be the average age the 30's is really making quite a showing these days. A month ago we met 3 couples in their early 30's that were ready to go.

 

Start checking out SLS and going to local parties, clubs and meeting people. Took us about a month of going every week to plug in. We've since unplugged after finding an amazing couple we're now exclusive with but for the folks who are looking to make several connections there's tons going on.

Share this post


Link to post

There definitely more people above the age of 40 involved in the lifestyle then there is younger people, but they are out there! When we started out she was about 28 and I was around 41. It has always been a bit of a struggle for us finding people that are compatible, because of our age difference, but we have had younger people contact that are interested here and there. I am lucky enough to have been blessed with younger then age looks and keep my body and health in check which I think helps in that regard. One thing people need to understand and respect is that younger people usually want to play with people that are closer to their own age and not closer to their parents age. Some people really have a hard time getting that, but I am sure if they were to ask their wife when they were 30 if they are interested in having sex with someone their parents age the answer would be no for most. You will hear a lot more older people say age is just a number then you will younger people.

Share this post


Link to post

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


  • Similar Content

    • By Trophy1802
      We are heading to Cuba on May 4th and will be staying at a non-lifestyle resort. As we enjoy getting together with other couples or inviting another guy to join us for some threesome fun, we are wondering if anyone has had any luck in attracting or getting the attention of potential interested play partners at non-LS resorts?
       
      If so, does anyone have any suggestions/tips/tricks that could help us in seeing if there are other people in the LS like us that may be willing to explore the possibility of some adult fun during our stay? After all, we are sure that we are not the only LS people that frequent non-LS resorts from time-to-time.
       
      Thanks and all the best to all Swingersboard members.
    • By MadlyInLuv
      The wife and I were discussing all of our swinging meet and greet dinners that never panned out. Many of them went really well and proceeded to planning stages for a date, but then aborted close to go-time.
       
      This could be just our perspective, but to us there seems to be a lot of people that fall into one of the following categories:
       
      -- They are in it to try to find a female for the wife. They have failed finding a unicorn, and so they have moved to the couples category and think they can just 'figure it out' and tolerate the spouse. Some of them even imply that they center around the girl play and get dodgy about what the guys are going to do while all of this is going down.
       
      -- The husband is clearly into it, and the wife acts into it but she doesn't interact as much. This inevitably ends in a last minute permanent flake where they disappear from the universe all of a sudden.
       
      -- Chatters. They meet for dinner and get excited. They chat enthusiastically for sometimes weeks trying to line schedules up. Time comes around for the play date and they bail.
       
       
      It's actually a welcome relief when couples figure out that our interests don't align very quickly and stop talking. That saves EVERYONE a lot of wasted time. I have a lot of regular good ol' American vanilla hobbies in my wife and I really don't want to waste weeks of energy for something that isn't going to go anywhere.
    • By Sawman
      I am at the mature end of the swinging demographic as are my play friends. The ladies have their share of curves and character lines and often prefer to wear something when younger, fitter ladies prefer total nudity. This is just to say clothing is totally OK if it makes you comfortable. This is not a photo shoot. This is intimacy and mutual giving. Besides, a little color and texture is nice to see and feel. When I know my partner is shy I can adjust and just observe that as a boundary.
       
      Now, go shopping.
    • By lcmim
      https://www.nytimes.com/2022/01/12/magazine/sex-old-age.html?smid=nytcore-ios-share&referringSource=articleShare
       
      I am 73 my wife is 69. She just sent me this article.
         
    • By SimpIySexual
      Okay so I feel like this is probably pretty common amongst new swingers but I need to discuss it with someone cause I feel kinda bad.
       
      So me and my wife started swinging and have only had 2 experiences so far, both at the swing club near us.  Both times me and my wife went she (a social butterfly) found someone within a couple hours and completed one of her fantasies both times.
       
      The first time I wasn't present with her I was just outside the room in the main play room. I did this to let her try it without any pressure or influence from me.
       
      The second time we dvp/dped her and had a lot of fun. Like 30 people stood around watching her wanting to get involved
       
      So my problem starts a few days ago when we got into a mild argument and she said "well it's kinda fucked. You have got to see me fuck another man. I've done it twice, but you have yet to do anything with another woman."
       
      So personally I'm an extremely shy and introverted person. She always thought I was the catch cause when we met in highschool all the girls were falling over me and I only had eyes for her. Well she walks into the club and literally everyone is looking at her. I don't have "game" shit Idk how to even flirt. 
       
      It's not because I feel bad or like I'm cheating, I could honestly give a fuck less about that sorta stuff. I just don't have the confidence to go to a woman I find attractive and shoot my shot. I grew up extremely abused and so rejection to me is something that crushes me. When you learn to never ask for anything being denied when you finally do just ends your confidence.
       
      So really my question, is this normal for one partner to be the clear catch and able to go find partners where the other partner can't find anyone due to confidence? I dont want to make her mad because I don't ever do it but I also don't want to force myself to go fuck someone I don't even find attractive or something just to make her happy.
       
      I am totally content in our swinging choice and everything else. This is really just one of those things I hadn't anticipated. I hate it cause I know I'm attractive. I just have 0 confidence to test it out. 
×
×
  • Create New...