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  1. #1
    Swingers Board Addict OhioCouple's Avatar
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    Post Anticipating First Meet With Another Couple

    We Welcome Your Advice,

    My husband and I are anticipating our first "encounter" with another couple. My question is...Is it normal to be nervous? And is there a dress code? We have checked out the clubs. (not been but looked into them.) I am more nervous than he is, as he is very comfortable. Am I being too critical for wanting to know how to dress....and wondering what my husband may think of me with another man/woman. Will I be compared to others or how he/they recieve attention? I have no jealousy issues and he doesn't either. Is this Normal?
    Thanks for any advice and opinions.
    Remember that human beings are complicated creatures. We like our bedtime routines but dislike routine in our bed times. - Sallie Foley, M.S.W.

  2. #2
    Founder JustAskJulie's Avatar
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    I would say you are quite normal.
    The question of how to dress... I think every woman goes through that before any big meeting or outing. If you are going to a club, check with the club on their dress code if they have one. Usually it's "dress sexy". You may want to take a change of clothes (even sexier than you wear) for later once you feel more comfortable. If you are just meeting a couple for the first time. Dress like you normally would going out. Be yourself, don't try to dress in a way that you normally wouldn't if going to the same place. You want to be comfortable so that you can focus on getting to know them and not worry about what others think of what you are wearing.

    All the other questions, those are normal too. I don't have any easy answers to them, they will just have to come in time.
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  3. #3
    Swingers Board Addict OhioCouple's Avatar
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    Julie,

    Thank you! Your response has eased some of my anxiety!

    ~Lori
    Remember that human beings are complicated creatures. We like our bedtime routines but dislike routine in our bed times. - Sallie Foley, M.S.W.

  4. #4
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    [QUOTE]Originally posted by OhioCouple:
    My husband and I are anticipating our first "encounter" with another couple. My question is...Is it normal to be nervous? And is there a dress code? We have checked out the clubs. I am more nervous than he is, as he is very comfortable. Am I being too critical for wanting to know how to dress....and wondering what my husband may think of me with another man/woman

    OHIO COUPLE
    My wife and I started going to swingers clubs about 11/2 yrs ago.I still get anxious(nervous) considering the possibilites for an evening. I'm sure your husband may not be outwardly showing it but inwardly is also nervous. I would agree with Julie wear some-thing sexy but comfortable for you. One of my wife and my little pleasures is shopping together at a sexy ladies boutique prior to going to a club. When she tries the sexy outfits on I get to watch the guys tongues drop in the store and also get to fantasize about how guys at the club will be drooling. I personally had no difficult feelings about my wife with another guy but I think each person has to make that decision for themselves.You seem to be saying that if you go to a club you have to swap that first time-don't put that pressure on yourself.Go and enjoy the sexually charged atmosphere and if you find a couple fine if not another opportunity will come up at a later date.

  5. #5
    Swingers Board Addict OhioCouple's Avatar
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    Jimcat,

    Thank you for your viewpoint. It is nice to know that these feelings are normal. Also great advice on the "dress". We recently ordered some things on line (for me). Perhaps at some point we will be able to "shop" together in a store. I am more reserved than he is, not really sure why....just a girl thing I suppose.

    ~Lori~
    Remember that human beings are complicated creatures. We like our bedtime routines but dislike routine in our bed times. - Sallie Foley, M.S.W.

  6. #6
    Swingers Board Addict danc694u's Avatar
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    Cool

    Between the 2 of us, we have about 7 years in the lifestyle. We still sweat this stuff.

    Dress comfortably. If a couple doesn't like you, there will be another. Face it, we can't all be irresistable to everyone we meet. That's a basic fact of life.

    You'll always be compared to someone or something. There's nothing to worry about, it's normal. It's how we decide whether we want to do a repeat.
    Phonies and Fakes Need not apply. We're as real as it gets, and don't have time to be wasting on dumbasses.

  7. #7
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    Default Re: What to wear?

    When we go to parties, only two as yet, she wears nice normal undies. We don't like the "fake" underwear in sex shops. We get turned on shopping for the "right" panties, bra or whatever. I do not like guys in thongs unless they are 100% physically. So I wear something black and tight fitting.
    A party is just a party [so far], though maybe we will get to feel more relaxed and talk to others. - Severe case of butterflies, high voltage sexual excitement together!

    In the past, with my ex, we did a weekend swinging visit. So we did a whole range of things including separate room overnight and hot tub, beach and drop in to meet their friends. The only aim was to look normal but attractive. I liked this idea, though we found it difficult to maintain a dialog with people we had nothing much in common with except, of course an interest in sex!

  8. #8
    anything boys can do....
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    Default Re: What to wear?

    NUMBER ONE: be comfortable in yourself, and sexy will shine through anything you wear. facelick
    I have a girl friend who drips sexy. Everything about her is sexy. I joke that she is sexy and I am cute. But that works for us. I tired recently to do the sexy thing and could not even walk around the house with out trying to cover up. I was not going to last outside. She, as usual, was stunning. But you know what, I still got alot of admiring looks because I had confidence in who I was. I looked good, my ass was smokin hot in my jeans, but I was still cute little prettylady. :rollseyes
    Go with what makes you feel good and right, and you can not go wrong
    Your friend,
    Prettylady

    ps. If your meeting at McDonalds I wouldn't suggest the micromini and fishnets, but if you go to the club, I wouldn't suggest sweatpants and oversized threadbare t-shirt either.
    Last edited by prettylady; 09-21-2007 at 09:31 AM. Reason: second thought
    To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.

  9. #9
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    Default Re: What to wear?

    Most clubs will have a dress code on their website. If not, a good rule of thumb is for women most anything goes, except for ratty jeans. If it's sexy looking it should fly. Guys are more restrictive. Usually Fridays are casual with no sandels ripped jeans, hats, etc. On Saturdays some clubs have a no Jeans policy for men, and most clubs will tell guys 'dress to impress.' Hope this helps, if you don't get an answer and have a particular club in mind send a pm, we have probably been there.

    Lol_Omg
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  10. #10
    Swingers Board Addict Sico_tiko's Avatar
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    Default Re: What to wear?

    wel the only thing we could say is dress sexy as much as u can so u could attract more males to u then u could choose

  11. #11
    Here to Stay jennifer_w_dfw's Avatar
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    Default Re: What to wear?

    Nervous is common for me. Even the couples that we know very well, and are great friends, I get, and so does DH get nervous. Its human nature to be, for the unknown that is yet to come.

    As far as dress, well that is where some of my nervous comes from. I try to dress comfortable, yet look nice. Hard to do sometimes, I wish I could go in my sweat pants, but I am sure that would look good. Wear what makes you relaxed.

  12. #12
    Swingers Board Addict ncmd_couple's Avatar
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    Default Re: What to wear?

    Can anyone suggest some online sites for nice clubwear in the 1x - 4x sizes.

    It would be much appreciated.

  13. #13
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    Default Re: What to wear?

    Can we list websites here? trashy.com is our favorite.

  14. #14
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    Default Re: What to wear?

    Quote Originally Posted by ncmd_couple View Post
    Can anyone suggest some online sites for nice clubwear in the 1x - 4x sizes.
    Not a catalog, however... I'm a Size 1X, and I've had great luck finding nice things to wear in the later hours of a party or club night in the lingerie section of Lane Bryant. Things like baby doll/thong sets, boy shorts & cami sets, and chemises.
    ~Dynamar

  15. #15
    Swingers Board Addict ncmd_couple's Avatar
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    Default Re: What to wear?

    Thanks for the suggestions. I'll check them out.


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