Disproportionate interest

[Edison Carter]

Edison here--Your profile sets the tone of 'backburner'. I know if I read it, I'd say as a full swing couple, that you're more into girl- girl play and being a voyeur to that. That doesn't mesh with most full swap couples. Also, because we full swap, Susan wouldn't want to be in any potential scene where I'd be left watching. Your profile is a red flag to the type of experience we avoid. So, by putting the men on the back burner, you got just that, and it includes you. Lastly, your wife appears sexually assertive and willing in the photos, you never smile and have your arms crossed in one. This also sets a tone. This may also explain while they're really interested in meeting her, and are unsure about you.

[discoandvyper]

Hmm.. you all have made great points. When I worded our profile I didn't realize it would become the only thing we were after. I assumed that normal play would apply and people would realize this.

I am wrong here.

I'll get to rewording our profile, but as someone (I'm sorry I don't remember your username) already stated the people in our area have probably already typecast us. I've just set myself up for a long uphill battle with some carefully misplaced words.

Thanks for all your input. Watch this space, in about ten minutes I should have a repost with a new profile.

[discoandvyper]

Ok, profile is re-worded. Now to hope that the people in our area don't hold our old profile against us.

Thanks again for all your input.

[The Fuse]

Hi Discoandvyper,

A couple of suggestions to combat typecasting: you\'ll get renewed interest in your profile if you change the default photo, just because it\'s different. We uploaded some new pictures the other day, and our profile views shot up dramatically. We even got email from one couple who apparently forgot they\'d written to us already and received a polite refusal. If you do this, perhaps some people will take another look at your profile and read your updated description.

Another thing you could do is change your tag line to something like \"UPDATED: Full swap, play for everyone\", or maybe just include that in your tag line. That way it might bring the point home or at least stick in peoples\' minds. They will see this even if they don\'t click on your profile.

Good luck!

[discoandvyper]

Suggestions taken and many thanks for them!

[2jersey]

Originally Posted by The Fuse

...Another thing you could do is change your tag line to something like \"UPDATED: Full swap, play for everyone\"

Mrs. Fuse, would you mind if we stole this particular idea?

[The Fuse]

Originally Posted by 2jersey

Mrs. Fuse, would you mind if we stole this particular idea?

Please do. I\'m flattered.

P.S. Obviously, ignore the weird slashes. I\'m using a web proxy at work as a weak attempt to hide my web activity. Somehow it inserts the slashes.

[good times]

Originally Posted by The Fuse

P.S. Obviously, ignore the weird slashes. I\'m using a web proxy at work as a weak attempt to hide my web activity. Somehow it inserts the slashes.

Warning - We know a guy that just got fired from his job for that a couple of weeks ago. Just an FYI.

[The Fuse]

Originally Posted by good times

Warning - We know a guy that just got fired from his job for that a couple of weeks ago. Just an FYI.

Thanks. If I get caught, which I doubt, it\'s an \"oh, well.\" type of thing from where I sit. I suppose I\'m tempting fate a bit.

[TeamSoBe]

If you want to attract women then you need to put yourself out there. If your profile's cover photo is of your wife and there are 20 photos of your wife and one blurry photo of you at the end then people will assume that you're trying to feature your wife and they will respond accordingly.

I (hubby here) got a little sick of feeling invisible a while back so we changed our SDC profile all around so that I'm in the cover photo by myself. 'Hi I'm a boy looking for girls!!' as opposed to 'check out my hot wife!!' The rest of the photos are about half and half of each of us, not just an endless list of pictures of her like in most profiles. Then I wrote the text in the profile from the first-person so that it's clear who wrote it, and I'm clear in the ad that we're not into girl/girl-only.

It worked beautifully, people get it. I'm not the hottest guy on this island by a long shot but now people approach us with attraction to me in mind or else they don't at all. It's obvious from our profile that we expect that or else we're not interested. We still get piles of inquiries every day but we get virtually none of the sort of only-into-her noise that we used to get when our cover photo was just her. People who see us out at nightclubs don't lump us into the bi-girl-with-neutered-husband category of soft swingers any more. When we meet people in person they recognize me and not just her. People even ask if I can play alone, which I'm not interested in but I enjoy being the one who gets asked.

We experimented for a few months with using a photo of the two of us together but there were plenty of people who just didn't get the hint, so now it's just me.

[Sweet_Candy]

Not much to add here except when we used to have in our ad that Candy would do GOG play we recieved a lot of softswap GOG play request where the men watch. We reworded our profile to state "don't expect GOG play and Sweet doesn't sit on the sidelines". What a difference wording can make.