Do you choose a target couple and lock on?

[Chicup]

We were sort of 'stalked' by a couple last weekend.

Mind you it wasn't too weird, but we were most definitely their prey. It started when he asked me to guard his wife while he went to the bathroom. I figured they were newbies and I looked safe or the like, but in conversation it turns out they weren't newbies so why would he need me to guard his wife? She wasn't drunk and the club is pretty safe seeming. Ok, well he comes back, and then says to guard her more while he goes to I don't know where. I'd been gone from my group for a while and after a bit excused myself after a few more minutes to rejoin my wife and the group at the other side of the bar (my wife thought I was only getting a drink after all).

Well when I get back to the group there is no room to stand next to my wife and I put my arm around a long time friend of ours and I see the other couple looking our direction. Not a big deal of course.

Fast forward about an hour or so and my friend and I are dancing and its semi crowded on the dance floor. While we are up there the stalking couple (not that I knew it at the time) starts to dance as well (they didn't get on the floor till after we did) and with the volume of the music they must not have known how loud they were while talking and I hear them make brief plans to split us up and dance. Now again, nothing 'weird' about it, though I'm not sure you want to let your target know they are a target I'm now pretty sure the whole 'guard my wife thing' was a set up of course too.

A couple of women fell over on the dance floor which broke up our dance early and we rejoined the group again, never really having exchanged much with this couple beyond a brief dance and a few words. We had no plans in playing with them as we were with a group of old friends and new ones who all came together.

It did get a little odd in the play rooms. We were in a private room but we had 9 people in there at one point, and at 1am with as much drinking as we had done people had to make a run to the bathroom now and then so the door didn't always stay locked. The male of the stalking couple sticks his head in the door and just kinda gives a hard stare around the room, he pulls his head back and another guy does the same. I tell them its occupied and lock the door. Some time later we are just about done and a couple had left earlier (so the door was unlocked again, sigh) This time he does the same thing looking in and kinda pushes his wife into the room too. Luckily we were finishing up so we all left at that point without having to say get out.

Now outside of the swinging etiquette fopaw (at this club closed door means stay out) and the fact that this guy was already told we were occupied once, do others pick out couples early in a party and attempt to 'get with them' in a calculated manner or are you more likely to just go with the flow and see what develops? Personally I have no problem with being 'singled out' we just weren't interested and the end got a bit creepy.

[EvilMJ]

I don't think it is unsual for people to get 'picked out', I mean hey, aren't we all there for one reason.

But I can understand the creepiness of being singled out by a couple that you don't realy want to hook up with. I had a couple come up and introduce themselves to me once and tell me that they thought I was a very attractive woman. I thanked them for the compliment, couldn't really introduce them to my husband as he was on the dance floor shaking his stuff and at some point moved on. I caught them watching me several times during the evening and then at one point I was getting naughty on the dance floor with a play friend of mine when I saw them dancing right next to us. He was watching with a huge smile on his face and motioning for his wife towards me. At that point I just left with my friend of the dance floor (he's really good about protecting me from the creepies, I have saved him a few times too ).

It's not that I didn't think they were nice people, In fact they were quite polite about the whole thing, and sure I was flattered at first by the attention, but sometimes it gets a little weird when you have someone so zoned in on you like that. I met them again at another dance, he complimented my outfit but I was with my usual group so they didn't hang out long.

I guess if I was attracted to them I may have considered spending more time talking to them and getting to know them, but as it was there was no spark (his wife was pretty, but I wasn't attracted to her either). THis was also early on in my 'swinging career' and I was still too nervous to know how to turn people down.

Man this is a long answer. Now I have been known to go to an event with my 'mental list' of couples, or singles that I want to hook up with. My friend thinks it's funny but she addmited to doing the same thing. However, I don't stalk them or make them nervous...now days I just invite them up to our room for drinks. Seems to work.

[curiousduo30]

We go with the flow....I don't set targets and neither does Mr., I think it is a bit creepy to do so, but I have seen it done and try to avoid those situations. As for the peeping into the play room....now that is going a bit too far....imho...

[Carol_Danny]

If we are being honest here, almost all of us will notice a nice couple, and "lock on target". I am not saying that we stalk them, but we will go over and chat and see where things go. If things don't feel right, we just move on. In our experience, that is the typical way things happen at clubs.

We have also had the unfortunate event of being almost stalked at clubs. More than once, we have had couples follow us around, and just not leave us alone. Sometimes you just have to be firm, with a not-so-polite "Go away!"

-- Danny

[BodyScape02]

I have honestly had someone tell me he was “cutting one out from the heard" Ick. Sounds a bit like what has been described in this thread.

In my personal experience, I recall having gone to say hi to a couple I know (and like )and they were sitting across from another couple who were ... well staking their claim, on my friends for the night... I got nasty looks for talking to and kissing them both .

My friends were then pressured into a room by them soon afterward. Because -they had specifically come there to meet them, therefore- They felt obligated... that was when they were new to the lifestyle. It did not go well.

The entire experience caused them to re-examine their "rules" .

I would say from what I have read that there appears to be a fine line between seducing another couple and being stalkers/hunters at the club.

I can only hope I am sensitive enough to know the difference myself.

Ms B.

[Floorman56]

Originally Posted by Carol_Danny

We have also had the unfortunate event of being almost stalked at clubs. More than once, we have had couples follow us around,
-- Danny

Well aren't you a little.......famous?

[BodyScape02]

Originally Posted by Floorman56

Well aren't you a little.......famous?

Well don't you sound a little ....jealous? ( ROLFLMAO)

( take it as a freindly ribbing... it was how it was ment)

[mrs good times]

Because we live in a tourist town we see this alot. Couples come in that are only going to be in town for the night or weekend and you can see the look on their faces as soon as they come in the front door. They scan the room, pick a couple and head that direction. They are quick to ask if there is any interest and don't linger if the answer is no. They start scanning the room again and move to the next couple and so on until they get a yes. When we were newbies we were targeted like this but we have since learned how to pick them out and avoid them if were not interested. We do enjoy watching them though as it can be quite humerous.

[Carol_Danny]

Originally Posted by Floorman56

Well aren't you a little.......famous?

All events mentioned happened prior to the "fame"

We actually fell out of the Lifestyle for a number of years, due to the "fame" (or infamy). Carol never knew if people wanted to be with her because of who she really is, or because of the perception people had of her. As a few people here who know us personally can attest to, Carol has always been the reluctant "Porn Star". She loved the "job", but hated the loss of anonymity. She's been "semi-retired" for a while now, and so we decided to get back to having fun.

-- Danny

[Jamie&Kieth]

We went to Hedomism lll once with two other couples, my girl friend and I were stalked in the sence they wanted to see how we act & what we would do. While we enjoy sex with other couples, it is a strange feeling to have a guy & guys stalk for the simple sake of a screw or a bj.

At the same time we have been to many parties (non swingers & a few swinger parties) where yes we do find them attractive and make an effort to talk & get to them but I consider that like boy/girl meeting at a dance.

I guess that is why we prefer to stay with friends rather than going out for a little "adventure". Oh well

[Floorman56]

Originally Posted by BodyScape02

Well don't you sound a little ....jealous? ( ROLFLMAO)

( take it as a freindly ribbing... it was how it was ment)

You bet he has a hot wife and his hair!!!!

[Pepper & Drew]

Originally Posted by Jamie&Kieth

We went to Hedomism lll once with two other couples, my girl friend and I were stalked in the sence they wanted to see how we act & what we would do.

The first year we went to Hedo II there was a cople that we called the "barracudas". I swear, it was like watching lions looking at a slow hyenna. They'd move around the pool trying to hook up. If it was a miss, off they'd move to the next target. It got to the point where we were introducing unsuspecting couples to them in order to get them off our backs. Now, with a few years under our belts, we'd be more direct.

Pepper

[SoulmatesNky]

Looking back, we have been targeted in a blunted manner three times. Once it was a couple that we felt were heavily scheming when they 'hit' us. The second time, I actually noticed the couple whispering hurriedly between themselves before they came at us again and the third time it was by a couple we were attracted to. Needless to say, it was a thrill when the third couple pointed came on to us and seduced us . The others rather immedietely turned us off.

We DO NOT enter a swing club or party and between us "plan" attacks. We dance and flirt and see who clicks. If it clicks, we pursue a bit, if they withdraw or seem disinterested we move on. We take the hint and others seem to too. The idea of 'targeting' heavily is all wrong for us. If you are targeting then you are focused more on the play time (not that we don't enjoy that too!!!), but we like to keep to playing with friends... not people we do not know, hence have to target us.

Soulmates

[savannah_bi_fem]

Interesting thread!!

We are the type to meet and mingle, chat and dance, and if something sparks, we just take it from there.

Last weekend at our local off-premise event, a new couple showed up. They sat away from the group for quite a while, just watching everybody. When they came over, the woman told my husband literally, "you are the target for the night". I didn't hear it, but our friends were with him when she said it to him. Hubby and the friends told me later. We thought it was funny. We proceeded through the evening, and both of them hitting on both of us, heavily. Felt very icky! They said it was her birthday, and I think they were just bound and determined that something was going to happen that night, no matter what. It didn't happen for them. LOL

[WildMiCouple]

Originally Posted by savannah_bi_fem

We are the type to meet and mingle, chat and dance, and if something sparks, we just take it from there.

This is exactly how we are. We go to the off-premise dances with no expectations other than have a fun evening out. I watch Tammy be her usual flirty self.....which is a lot more enjoyable at a dance than a vanilla bar ....while I work on being more outgoing with the ladies. With the "no expectations" mode, there's no disappointments at the end of the night It also makes Tammy feel more comfortable. If we happen to click with others that night.....great. But we would never "lock on target" with another couple.

Brett