Finding Third for MFM and making sure he's not a crazy

[SexhoundDog]

I think Mr. Naughty has given you GREAT advice.

And along the same lines but from a previous post, how are things progressing between Mrs. Naughty and the Waterboy, Mr. Naughty? After your initial post, I had this image of her body painted in leopard spots stalking her prey, only with her cowgirl hat on! Hot image!!

He hasnt been back yet. I think he is coming this week, though I am not sure. We will update that thread after his visit. Mrs naughty is looking at it as a challenge and she LOVES a challenge.

[akamgaxoxo]

I absolutely love the advice Mr. Naughty!! You two sound like a trip, too bad you are so far away!
Yes there will be drinking, but the hubby and I agreed that since these are good friends of ours not to get carried away. I had emailed the invite out about the party to the prospective M. No response as of yet..but he did tell me the other day that his computer was freezing up?! I am not sure if that is a load of shit or not! But I will find out tonite!
I love the sexy but lite approach that your wife has to breaking the ice and doing some flirting. Nice!!
My hubby had the idea of buying condoms where the M works and flopping them down on the counter and just smiling. Just to see what he does. HAHA...don't think I will take that approach tho!
Thanks a bunch!

[EternallySingle]

I've been this guy, everyone. Even if he is active in swinging, he is not thinking anywhere along the lines that mrs. akamgaxoxo is looking to swing with him. He's probably thinking (hoping) that she and her husband is sizing him up for a single female friend that they have, or maybe his or her sister or cousin.

As for taking him to a party, now is not the time. Not until you get an idea of what he is willing to do sexually. While most men fantasize about a situation like this, they also fantasize about flying around the world in a balloon or riding on the space shuttle. But how many would do it if given the actual chance? Not many. So, your next step is to cut back the flirting a bit and start the nuts and bolts sex and relationship talk. First the husband, then together, then the wife. That way he will start to know what is going on and have a chance to tell you "no way in this lifetime" before you say something you can't take back.

Just my opinion, however.

[akamgaxoxo]

EternallySingle-love the advice, not sure I thought about it in that way. More over I didn't want to give him the wrong impression on my own that I wanted an affair or to swing solo. Not our cup of tea.
So are you saying that my hubby should chat out sex talk with him? Then so on and so forth? As far as my hubby and I are concerned we have talked I think every scenario and topic we could in regards to this.....

[EternallySingle]

At first it should seem like locker room talk, so you all know each others limits and fantasies. Depending on how well you know this man, your husband might jokingly mention that you two were looking to take some lessons in swing dancing, found these wife swapping sites, and thought "hmmm". From there, you would know instantly if it is something he would consider of if he'd be totally turned off by it. Don't say that you want to do it right away, but that it was something you play with occasionally by pretending to be with other people. Of course, in a guy talk kind of way (your husband will know what I'm talking about). He will know if its worth pursuing, then the two of you talk to him on a more serious level.

That will lessen the chance of him backing out or spilling the beans about you. It will also keep him from getting the impression that you want an affair.

Posted by EternalySingle:

"As for taking him to a party, now is not the time. Not until you get an idea of what he is willing to do sexually."

I was under the impression this was a vanilla party. Not a sex or swinger party.

If it is a vanilla party I see no problem having him come along. It will get everyone more comfortable getting to know each other.

If it is a sex or swinger party then I will have to agree that would be a bad idea.

As far as flirting......

We have found that mrs naughty flirting with the single male while I am around gives him the signal that I am cool with it. She doesnt just jump in his lap when we walk in the door but progressively turns it up as the night progresses. Plus its just damn fun!!!

But i do let him know that I am cool with the whole situation.

[akamgaxoxo]

Yes this is a "vanilla" party! These are good friends of ours, and yes they do know that we are interested in the M....but all parties agreed that now would not be the time to get busy so to speak. More just for fun and to feel out the situation. He did not reply to the invite, and it was written in the sense that both my husband and I were interested in him attending and not just myself. We might just stop by where he works one last time today to see if he is in. But we are not worried if he decides not to come out with us. He is a work horse (16 hr days) so I am not gonna take it personally that he might not wanna hang with us right now. I've got all the time in the world.
Thanks for all the advice!!
Have a great weekend!!

[akamgaxoxo]

Hey guys...party went great....tho the M didn't come we did have a blast with out him. Kinda unsure of why he didn't respond to our invite. But who knows. My hubby did email him and tell him in a nice way that he missed a good time, but that he could chat with me anytime. (just to kinda send a feeler out there and let him know it's cool to talk to me on his own) But we'll see!
Thanks for all the replies!

[akamgaxoxo]

Well guys, I have weeded out weirdo, or rudeness number one! So sad! I don't want to totally write this guy off, but hey when you don't write back to emails, (email address was initiated mutually) that's enough to piss someone off! Email rudeness is enough to start another thread...but maybe the hubby and I will begin our Personal ad hunt.

plus the funny thing is, I think he might have just been scared off by my hubby, not in a bad way, but the fact that he's in the mix....

Sorry things didnt work out.

But this kind of thing only works for a small minority of society. But once you take a look into that small minority you will find there are a whole lot of people out there!!!!

BTW,

I dont think he was weird for not responding to the slight advances that were made. It just might have been to much for him to handle no matter how you went about it.

To me weird would be if he was interested in what you were offering but wanted to bring his dog along.

Now that would fall into the category of weird !!!!!

[CB_n_Red]

I guess we have to accept that much of society views what we as swingers do as being weird in the first place. Sad but true.

CB

[akamgaxoxo]

See I do agree with you both, but I don't think I am a weirdo..I just wanna have fun! Hubby thinks I shouldn't write him off just yet, but the next time I see him play hard to get. Dunno if I can do that! But hey we have put our ad out there and have gotten emails...so we'll see. Now what do you all think of people posting up pics of their dicks for all the world to see? I guess you could say we are kinda discrete in that way. Very interesting to say the least!

I don't think I am a weirdo..I just wanna have fun!

Thats exactly what it is all about!!!!!!!!!!

Have fun!! Life is good!!!

I, nor does anyone else on this board, think you are weird for wanting to swing!!

You are secure enough in your self and your relationship to fullfill fantasies EVERYONE has wether they are willing to talk about it or not.

People who dont swing may say we are weird but what I think they are trying to say is they are jealous!!

As far as pics go,

We dont have any dick pics in our profile. Mainly because I am average and who wants to see that .

Anyway, when we first started on the swinger ad sites we had no pics of us, then grainy pics, then just G rated and now full nude and some soft sex shots.

We tend to evolve the further we venture int this lifestyle!!!

[CB_n_Red]

Originally Posted by Mr&Mrs-naughty

People who dont swing may say we are weird but what I think they are trying to say is they are jealous!!

Sounds about right to me!

Strikes me we get contacted by enough wannabees, so there must be an element of jealousy in it!

CB