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| Finding People Online dealing with personal ads, profiles, email and chat in your effort to find others to swing with. |
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#1 (permalink)
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| Active Member |
We are brand new. Mr. Paws and I have just created a profile on Swing Lifestyle. How secure is the site? Mr. is concerned about putting pics of us up - we are worried about his job and we have to tread lightly.. but we want to meet people, make some new friends & he's NOT the club type. Any thoughts? Advice? Thank you in advance! |
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__________________ The future is no place... To place your better days ~ DMB | |
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| | #2 (permalink) |
| Julie's Helper Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 4,717 Location: Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania Status: a very married man Swing Lifestyle Name:SW_PA_Couple
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If you are a paid member or a lifetime member at S L S, you can put up private pictures and only the people you choose can see them - very secure. If there is any concern for professional associates seeing, you should not put up public pictures. Any old clown can get a "free" subscription and see them.
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__________________ Living in Schrödinger's Cathouse | |
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| | #6 (permalink) |
| As Seen on TV |
We have a rule to never share our private pics with uncertified couples. If they are uncertified we ask to do a phone verification with the ladies. You'll find out quickly how many profiles go silent when asked to do that.
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__________________ V is Him , T is Her .
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| | #7 (permalink) |
| Swingers Board Addict | We have been free members on there for years and years and never have had a problem, even though we currently live in a small city. You have to be smart about your public profile and as long as you're perceived as REAL, the experienced swingers won't mind.
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| | #8 (permalink) |
| Swingers Board Addict Join Date: May 2009 Posts: 995 Location: Florida Status: He writes, she corrects spelling. Swing Lifestyle Name:DigginIt
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Swing Lifestyle is very safe but no site is perfect. We were very concerned at the start about our privacy and it took us a year to eventually feel comfortable with putting our actual zipcode on our profile. We used to use towns that were 45 minutes away because she works very high in mgmt with people who are very uptight. If your wife has very distinguishable hair then crop the photo vs. whiting out that area. Watch for things that are a dead give away such as tattoos. Free members can not see private pictures or pictures in emails so no worries there. Just keep the public ones clean. We only share our private gallery with people who are certified. Even those that say, we don't play the certification game it takes a lot for us to open photos because most local event organizers will certify you as, "hey, they came to our social. great couple." and that's all you need. Sorry PT...we disagree about free couples (unless certified). We don't ever reach out to free couples. If they reach out to us, we will be like, meet us at the next social. That's the extent of any conversations we have with free members. Just use common sense when speaking with people. People will say, can you send us your pictures to our YIM account. We are like fuck no. ![]() We do get a lot of requests like that. |
| Last edited by DigginIt; 01-12-2012 at 11:05 AM. | |
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| | #9 (permalink) |
| Active Member |
We've found that meeting couples via the internet alone is more difficult than it needs to be. Since our chosen means of meeting others these days is face to face through a local club, or various lifestyle events, pics are slightly less important to us. Not to say that we'd ever "plan" to meet others at the club without seeing something first, we wouldn't. It's hard enough to connect with others that are on the same level personality wise, so let's just get be sure there's a physical interest before we look for more. We can't imagine having to go back to the blind internet dating stage at this point, but can really relate to those who must do that because of a lack of lifetyle venues nearby. When we lived in a small town back east, we played the blind date scene, and it grew to be frustrating in having to deal with so many flakes, fakes and wannabees. In our opinion to try and do that without any pictures in your profile would just further stack the odds against you in finding any suitable playmates. Like others have said, you have total control over what you choose to show as public on Swing Lifestyle. For instance, we've personally elected to blur our faces in our public album, and have arranged our pic order so the first 5 shots are private. This keeps free members from viewing them, or used to anyway, as when they open a profile they can only see the first five pics. We've nothing against free members, and happily open our pics if they e-mail us, but it helps keep the lookiloos, who set up a free membership just to see if they recogonize anyone they know. It's helped tremendously to weed out the BS e-mails and chat invites too. Additionally, we only open our private pics to those we already know or actually have planned to meet.
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| | #11 (permalink) | |
| Swingers Board Addict | Quote:
![]() LOL, I think, considering where you're from, that's a legitimate approach. Here in Alabama it's not worth the expense. Too many people are not what we're looking for....Montgomery is the fatest city in the country and Alabama is the fatest state in the country. So, something like your "meet us at the social" line doesn't work because we're not spending $100 for a social full of people we're not attracted to. Now, if we can ever get to the Emerald Coast socials that's another story ![]() I just think you have to take it with a grain of salt. There are a lot of good/legit free members & easy ways to weed them out. You have to deal quick and heavy with them (usually in one template email we use) & you, as the free member, have to be willing to risk a little bit of privacy to establish yourself online. We have plenty of certs on Swing Lifestyle so that helps us be perceived as real in that community with guys and most couples, but some couples still aren't sure. Those are the folks you have to take the extra step of allowing them to call, etc. To each his/her own; we would just caution about ignoring free members because they're free. TRUST ME; there are MANY paid members on Swing Lifestyle (especially couples) who are nothing more than the male sneaking a credit card payment past his wife so he can troll the internet for ways to be unfaithful. Payment does not equal 'legitimate'. | |
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| | #12 (permalink) | |
| Swingers Board Addict Join Date: May 2009 Posts: 995 Location: Florida Status: He writes, she corrects spelling. Swing Lifestyle Name:DigginIt
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No need for tears!I think we get about 5 new people a week around here that mysteriously never seem to pay, add photos, etc. They are just signing up, like you said, to 'troll' the site. The ones that do add a picture only add a single picture of a girl. Things that make you go...Hmmmmmm ![]() I agree about the paid people can be fake as well which goes back to the "we only share our pictures with certified people" comment. Even the ones who are paid and uncertified we look at cross eyed..."See you at the Social" ![]() The main thing is free people can't see your pictures and we won't send off site. Here is something funny. We had one free couple all hot to trot to meet us and I'm thinking 'dude, we could be majorly ugly' so either you will fuck anything with a pulse or you'll fuck anything with a pulse. No thanks. | |
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| | #13 (permalink) | |
| Swingers Board Addict | Quote:
We'd just move on. | |
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| | #14 (permalink) |
| Swingers Board Addict Join Date: May 2009 Posts: 995 Location: Florida Status: He writes, she corrects spelling. Swing Lifestyle Name:DigginIt
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Sandy_paws - I posted this somewhere else. Get a Google Voice account. It's absolutely free. You can give the GV Number out to people you are not sure you want to have your phone number yet. On the control panel for Google Voice you just set all calls to forward to your cell phone. They never get your real #. When you see the Google Voice forwards their phone number and caller id information so it's 'set and forget' If you need to call them, there is a Google Voice app you can download and dial from the Google App on your phone and the number shows up as your assigned Google Voice number and not your cell phone. It's awesome!! |
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| | #15 (permalink) | |
| Better than Ice Cream Join Date: Oct 2004 Posts: 6,722 Location: va Status: Couple. He posts, She reads
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sandy_paws, I think if you follow the advice given by the previous posters on how to go about posting the pictures, you'll be fine. | |
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__________________ Knew a girl named Nikki I guess you could say.... | ||
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